The Alphabetical Listing of All Our Recommendations

last update 23 February 2008

Select a letter to search for a title:

A|B|C|D|E|F|G|H| I |J|K|L|M|N|O|P|Q|R|S|T|U|V|W|X|Y|Z

1 - 9 

• 101 Reykjavik Undoubtedly the best Icelandic film of the year, this is the tale of Hylrun and his rudderless life. Thirty something Hylnur (Hilmir Snaer Gudnason) is unemployed, lives at his mom's house and spends his time wisely, watching porn films and drinking beer. He has a semi- girlfriend, Hofy, played by Thrudur Vilhjalmsdottir, who eventually just gives up on him. Things start to get interesting when his mom brings home a girlfriend, Lola, a hot Flamenco dance instructor. Well, on New Years eve, mom is away and things tend to get a little rowdy in Reykjavik, and the drunken Lola (Victoria Abril) and Hyrur connect. A child ensues, and his mom and Lola decide to raise the kid as their son. That makes Hylnur the father of his brother or some such thing and he short circuits and actually moves out. This is the directorial debut of Baltasar Kormakur and tastefully laced throughout by various renditions of the Kinks' song "Lola".  90 minutes, Rated III, in Icelandic and some English w/subtitles DVD
• 12 Monkeys All right, maybe you understood this one the first time you saw it, but most of us watched it at least twice. Brad Pitt plays an excellent wacko and you can view this one just for the prison scene which shows what Terry Gilliam can do with a decent budget. Bruce Willis turns up the volume on his Pulp Fiction persona for his role as Cole the time traveling prisoner.
• 2 Days in The Valley Plenty of twists and some truly bizarre characters make this a worthwhile waste of your time. I'm fairly certain there's a bad cop in the mix. Directed by John Herzfeld, the cast includes James Spader, Teri Hatcher, Danny Aielo, Louise Fletcher but not Steve Buscemi. 1996 Rated R 108 Minutes
• 200 Motels Frank Zappa and all his buddies had a lot of fun and they videotaped it so we could all enjoy it too. Look for Ringo Starr, Keith Moon and I believe Theodore Bikel in this Mothers of Invention extravaganza. Unrated about 80 minutes (we need a copy of this)
• 301/302 Named after two adjacent apartments, this Korean tid bit is more subtle than a Jeffrey Daumer documentary. The tenants are quite different. 302 is a reclusive writer who is past bulimic, she pukes at the very thought of food. Soon-Hee is 301, a youngish divorcee who loves to cook for her loved ones. She feels 302 is rejecting her love, by failing to enjoy her intricate meals. To prove her love, 302 makes the ultimate sacrifice (in a Christ-like manner) . Even in subtitles, this movie loses very little of the emotion it jams down your throat. 1995
• 303 Fear Faith Revenge Five new students at the exclusive St George Boarding school are curious about six students who died at the school in 1952. They use a Ouija board to contact one of the dead students and they open a door to the past. All hell breaks lose and one of the five becomes possessed and the past events begin anew. Fairly stock horror stuff with an Asian flair. Thai w/subtitles. 93 minute Rated IIb
• 6ixtynin9  Tom was sitting home, bemoaning her lost job when someone leaves a box of money on her doorstep. A bit of a moral dilemma, but, she decides to keep it. It isn't long before two thugs turn up and ask for it back. Well, somehow they end up dead, and she stuffs them into the closet and goes about her business. Deciding it is in her best interest, Tom methodically arranges to get out of town, buying a black market passport to speed her departure. Thing do not go smoothly or , hell, why would you watch it to the end. It smacks a little of a Thai version of True Romance, but it is quite good. 1999 Rated IIb 90 minutes Thai w/subtitles

A

Acacia Korean director Park kyi-hung steers this unsettled tale of a middle aged couple who adopt a young boy Jin-sung  who has a strong affinity for trees. There is a barren acacia tree in their yard that he speaks with and nurtures back to health all the while carrying a beetle around in his palm. Like many Korean films it starts off slowly but from the beginning there is a subtle trace of dread, that you know will escalate accompanied by eerie music. When he is not talking to the barren tree, the boy plays with Min-jee the hemophiliac little girl next door. Before the tree bears fruit, his adopted mother becomes miraculously pregnant which results in Jin-sung acting up. The birth of the baby and all the attention lead to some obvious problems with some unforeseen consequences. Korean w/subtitles 113 minutes 2003 Rated age 15+

Addicted to Murder This one fit in the Vampire category as well as Serial Killers and perhaps Losers too. Poor Joel is a serial killer and perhaps a vampire simultaneously creating a major self image problem. Written produced and directed by Kevin Lindenmuth you may have to look in the horror section to find a copy. There is also a sequel by the same suspects oddly titled Addicted to Murder II. 1995 Not Rated 90 Minutes Brimstone Productions

Adrenaline Drive There seems to be an abundance of movies that combine large bags of money and high speed car chases. This is a Japanese entry for this new Oscar category. Suzuki has a boring life, no lovelife and a crappy job with a boss that constantly brow beats him. This all ends when he rearends a car owned by a yakuza (Japanese mobster). To repay his debt, Suzuki is pressed in to service by the mob  and his life will never be the same. Mainly it is a love story, but it would take longer to explain than if you just watched it. Directed by Shinobu Yaguchi. 1998 Japanese with English subtitles.

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across The Eighth Dimension A rather lengthy title for a durable hip Sci Fi spoof. Aurra sent us this poignant synopsis:  My favorite UFO film is the Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the Eighth Dimension. Red 'Lectroids in bad plaid polyester suits vs. Black 'Lectroids with dreadlocks and Jamacian accents. Every single one of them named John. Plus Buckaroo and his Hong Kong Caveliers, and the Blue Blaze Irregulars! Mwhahahahahaa! Thanks Aurora 1983 Rated PG 100 minutes

The Addiction What the heck is this movie about ? Directed by Abel Ferrara, it could have been an NYU film school project. This pretentious vampiress can't help but quote Kierkegard while seducing her latest victims. Anyway, her drug of choice is hemoglobin, you can sort it out. Christopher Walken is in this one, too, but then, whose counting? 1995 B&W 82 minutes

Aguirre - Wrath of God Did you ever meet a conquistador who spoke German ? Werner Herzog creates an interesting story from the slim historical record of the errant Spaniard. Klaus Kinski plays the rather Teutonic looking Aguirre. Also recommended is a film by Herzog that was called The Enigma of Kaspar Hauser, but keeps resurfacing with different English titles. It definitely needs no subtitles.

Alive In the interest of completeness, we'll include this one, but it ain't recommended. Uruguayan rugby soccer players crash in the Andes and eat their goalie and the whole forward line. Oh yeah, it's a true story.

All Things Fair Stig is an attractive young man in high school in Sweden during the war. He catches the eye of all the girls who are no competition for his flirtatious teacher. She keeps him after class and his teenage infatuation increases with her attentions. It's apparent their attraction is eventually going to get them in trouble, so if that interests you, be sure and find a copy. Most men fantasize an adolescence like this one. Directed by Johan Widerberg. Rated R

Amateur If you have never seen a Hal Hartley film, this is a great starting point. Martin Donovan wanders into a Manhattan diner, battered and amnesiac with a pocketful of Dutch Guilders. An ex-nun Isabelle Hubert interrupts her pornographic writings to tend to him. She takes him home and nurses him as the pieces start to emerge. It seems his ex wife Sophia ( Elina Lowensohn from Pulp Fiction) pushed him out a window. He was apparently her handler, drug provider, and producer of her porn movies. His name is Thomas and he is wanted by an international cartel of mobster accountants. It is all too tangled to describe and very engrossing. 1994 Rated R 105 minutes 1/99

American Buffalo A powerful David Mamet play transferred to the screen with Dustin Hoffman (Teach) and Dennis Franz (Don) in the key roles. In a junk store run by Don, they plan the robbery of a coin collection. Don had enlisted the help of a kid Bobby, (Sean Nelson) to help with the heist but Teach convinces him that he is the man for the job. You will seldom see acting this good and dialog so poignant in one place. Don't expect an action movie, it is, after all, a play.  The interior of the junk store is perfect. 1996 87 minute 

American Desi Krishnagopal Reddy (Deep Kitdare) is anxious to get out from under his immigrant parents control so he can shed the last remnants of his Indian Heritage. He and hid friend head off for their freshman year at Middlesex College in New Jersey with great excitement and big plans. Kris, as he prefers to be called, is horrified to find his three roommates are a Sikh, a Muslim and an Indian homeboy. Trying to distance himself from Indian culture only alienates his roomies, who refer to him as an ABCD short for American Born Confused Desi. It is not until he falls in love with India born Nina (Purva Bedi) that he comes to terms with the benefits of his heritage. The film is well written and quite funny. There is a similar Canadian film "Marsala" that takes a different slant on this same theme. A filim directed by Piyush Dinker Pandya 90 minutes  English 1999 Unrated 

American Movie This is the true story of Mark Borchardt's obsession with making his own films in Nowhere, Wisconsin. This man is truly  monomaniacal about finishing the film he started a few years back. He presses his aged relatives and addled friends into performing and financing what appears to be a truly awful horror movie entitled Coven. This obsession is destroying his life and his finances; yet you find yourself rooting for this guy who would just be another loser if he were stripped of this one idea. It might even be called inspirational, really. Filmed by Chris Smith and Sarah Price.   Rated R 104 min 

American Perfekt Jake (Robert Forster) can't make a decision without flipping a coin, which is pretty odd for a psychiatrist. He meets up with Sandra ( Amanda Plummer) when he helps her out in the desert. They book a double room at the nearest hotel, and we never see her again. The next morning Jakes meets Alice (Fairuza Balk) , who has come to meet her sister, Sandra. Jake says nothing about Sandra and the two of them head out together pursued by a pissed off con man. Well paced, moderately anxiety inducing and kind of entertaining. 100 minutes 1999 Rated R

Anarchy TV Directed by Jonathan Blank this is Zappa family production with no less than three of Frank's kids in the cast, not to mention Alan Thicke. Essentially a pointless romp with lots of  grandstanding, bad acting, sophomoric humor and embarrassingly pointless nudity as some radical student types retake a TV station that was co-opted by televangelist Thicke.  Somehow they even got Timothy Leary to do a walk on. Yikes. Better you should watch Blank's other film Sex,Drugs & Democracy  90 minutes Rated R 2000

Anchoress A beautiful young woman is divided between the church and the feudal lord of her medieval patch. The virgin Mary keeps appearing to her and she is persuaded by the Bishop to wall herself up in the church and devote herself to her visions. This stark Flemish/English movie give a scary visual rendering to life in feudal Europe. Directed by Chris Newby it stars Natalie Morse and Eugene Bervoets. Black & White Letterbox Unrated 108 Minutes

Angel Heart Mickie Rourke is a private detective hire by the devil (Robert Deniro) to track down someone. The detective trappings are straight Sam Spade, but Mr. Rourke redefines "a rough night" way beyond anything Sam could conjure up. Lisa Bonet plays a hot young voodoo priestess, that must have given Bill Cosby fits. Only accept the NC-17 version, the sex is essential to the eeriness of the plot. The book Fallen Angel by William Hjortsberg is also worth reading. Brownie McGhee the famous blues artist has a bit part as Toots Sweet. This is scary stuff and was nicely stylized under Alan Parker's writing and direction. 1987 113 minutes Rated R and NC17.

The Animal Room Clockwork Orange meets the Jersey shore. Recalcitrant teens are relegated to the 'animal room' in their school's basement. Doug Van Deusen is a gothic bully that enjoys beating up a fellow animal room inhabitant druggy Arnie. There are some nostalgic 60's drug hallucination sequences but little  else of interest. Filled with teenage angst. Kubrick did it better. Directed by Craig Singer. 1999 Rated R

Another Day In Paradise Rosie and Bobby are pretty happy, robbing vending machines and shooting crank. Then they link up with the professional junky/criminal couple of Melvin and Sid ( James woods and Melanie Griffiths) who take them in as apprentices. It's a tough education and you get to se every painful minute as they learn how to rob, shoot and shoot up. You know this story cannot end happily. Directed by Larry Clark , Natalie Gregson Wagner is Rosie and Vincent Karthersen is Bobby. 101 minutes Rated R 5/99

Apocalypse Now Redux If you were impressed by the original release of this classic, set a few hours aside and rewatch it, intact. Awesome.

Apostle This is the ultimate Robert Duval film. He wrote it, directed it, produced it and of course he stars in it. The Apostle is a sincere dedicated man of God who gets slightly derailed when his wife (Farrah Fawcett) leaves him for youth minister of their temple. He skips town and lets God direct him to Bayou Boutte, LA via Trailways bus. Starting over, he touches many lives with his personal brand of religion. The cast includes June Carter Cash, Billy Bob Thornton, Todd Allen and lots of extraordinary talent. All aspiring actors/actresses should watch this to see how it's done. 1998 Rated PG 13

Arizona Dream Okay, here's a quiz. What do Faye Dunaway, Jerry Lewis, Johnny Depp, and Lili Taylor have in common? The answer is "Not much", except they are all in this movie. Axel (Depp) is a fish expert working in NYC when he gets abducted back to Arizona by his cousin, Vincent Gallo. How they drive to Arizona in one evening is never explained, but they are going to Uncle Jerry Lewis' wedding to a 20 year old Polish beauty.  Axel meets Dunaway at his uncle's car dealership and they have a quixotic courtship while Lili Taylor accompanies them on the accordion. This is a very French film, filmed with an American cast under the Yugoslav director Emir Kusterica. various cuts from 120 to 145 minutes long. Michael J. Pollard gives his best performance since Bonnie & Clyde. Rated R, English 1993 Thanks to Charles for bring this film to our attention

Art House Director Leigh Slawner scraped up 200,000 bucks to make a film about a guy trying to make a film. The hero, Ray McMichael, works in a coffee shop and struggles to make his "film". His acquaintance,  and unsuccessful filmmaker, Wes Craig, teams upwith him and then rips off for his Magnum Opus script. Undeterred, Ray perseveres and encounters a few distinctive characters along his personal path to fame, including the roommate from hell. This is Leigh Slawner's first film and is released on the First Rites label. Rated R 88 minutes 2000 

Awara Paagal Deewana Loosely translated as "Honey Crazy Love" this is a rather non traditional Masala film with a Kung Fu plot, complete with monster trucks, flamenco dancers, murder, subterfuge, diamonds, wife swapping, blonde belly dancers and lots of gunfire. When Babu, the criminal underworld boss dies he leaves 10 billion rupees worth of diamonds to split between his son, daughter and her husband. Whoever gets to New York, alive can claim title to them. Vikrant is the evil son who plots to kill his brother-in-law Guru Gulab Khatri. They fight on both sides of the Atlantic and comic relief is provided by two hen-pecked dentists from New Jersey. Hindi w/subtitles 150 minutes+ unrated

Azumi "Merely killing one hundred bandits will not save this nation" advises the master. Ten orphans, trained in secret have grown into ruthless assassins and set out with their master to change the course of Japanese history. First they are whittled down to a team of five. Their first mission is to put a cap in some warlords ass. Of course, as Samurai, they actually use swords, but you get the idea. Following the assassin's motto "There are many evil people in the world. Someone has to kill them" they then attack a second, more cunning, warlord. They only succeed in killing his double which allows him to plot his revenge. He releases Bijomaru the murderous drag queen, from prison, and s/he deftly dispatches one of the team. Another assassin falls victim to the nasty Ninja trick of poisoning their swords. Azumi, the only female member of the group  then gets turfed out by their master for being too soft. The remaining two killer orphans and their master storm the palace in a futile attempt to get their target, but immortality eludes them too, leaving only Azumi to finish the task. We won't spoil the ending, but this is a great tale of war & peace. At times,the stylized violence resembles a Nintendo game but overall the film should manage to hold your interest. Think of it as a Japanese version of " Showdown at the OK Corral". Very very bloody and kinda cool. Expect a sequel, soon.

B

Babette's Feast The actors are two dimensional next to the fulsome dinner served up by Babette. You leave this film with the strange sense it was an erotic love story, yet that's not the case. Eat before hand.

Bad Hazel runs a dirty deeds business from her house in Queens. Her lodgers will kill your spouse, snuff your neighbors pet or dismember an illegal alien on short notice. When she's not booking jobs, Hazel runs an electrolysis parlor in her kitchen, because nobody likes too much hair. Probably a real shocker 20 years ago, this Andy Warhol production is still good for a few laughs. 1977 Rated R 101 minutes 12/98

Baise Moi  Two young and bored French women  Manu (Karen Bach) and Nadine ( Raffaela Anderson) simultaneously kill their roomate/lover over somewhat trivial arguments. Very soon, thereafter, the two women meet by chance at a train station, There are no trains so they take the dead boyfriends car and head for the city. They stop at the seashore and soon become fast friends. The pair decide to try a little armed robbery and kill their first victim, a woman at an ATM. They pick up two guys in a bar then go out for a little hit and run action. They rob a gun store for more fire power  and shoot the owner for kicks. Don't be lulled into thinking this is a French Thelma and Louise. The sex is gritty, the violence is, well, violent and the guys are all assholes. Their brutality starts gaining velocity when they stomp their next victim to death in a hotel room. I was still hoping for a happy ending but the ladies start drinking heavily and set out to pick up a few more guys/victims. They form a pattern of sex sandwiched between violent acts and thier next victims are two cops whom they waste at a traffic stop and they add a third woman to their party (Coralie Trinh Thi). She takes them home and she and her boyfriend take in the homicidal pair. Not to spoil the rest, let's just say it escalates. Directed & written by Virginie Despentes French w/subtitles 2002

Bajrangbali If you think Americans invented Superman, you've never seen a Hanuman film. This monkey god star of the epic Indian poem Ramayana , has all the super hero moves without having to moonlight at the Daily Planet. Bajranbali is in color and the extra-special effects will compensate for the hard to assimilate myth. Do not watch this movie under the influence of mind altering drugs, it could prove fatal. Starring the incomparable Dara Singh 175 minute Unrated Hindi w/subtitles on DVD/VHS

Barfly A Mickey Rourke Faye Dunaway film about the power alcohol can hold over people. John Majetic tells us this is a great record of depravity that rivals Drugstore Cowboy. Based on the true life story of writer Charles Bukowski who was always the life of the party. 1987 Rated R 97 minutes

Barking Dogs Never Bite Yoon Ju hates dogs, or at least he hates barking dogs. To help preserve his calm, he kidnaps dogs in his building and dispatches them in various ways. A cute little chow eaten by the superintendent while another he flings off the roof. A woman in the management office, is wise to him and sets out to thwart his dognapping. There is a disclaimer at the end which says "No puppies were hurt in making this film" but you may question that statement after you've seen this film. Oh, yeah, it's a comedy. This was a runaway hit in Korea, honest. Directed by Bong Joon-Ho. Korean w/subtitles 2002 rated IIA 110 minutes

Bandits This all women's German rock band is made up of ex convicts using music as their route to rehabilitation. They get into trouble and then they try and get out of it. Nicht ausgezeichnet .Rated R 110 Minutes German w/subtitles 1997

Bangkok Haunted There are three horror vignettes retold as stories in a bar. In story #1 Paya , the village beauty, is best friends with Gnod, the local hunchback geek. When they are grown, Gnod kidnaps her on the night of her wedding and makes a drum with her spirit trapped inside and perhaps a few of her body parts. 100 years later an antique dealer is haunted by Paya when he comes into possession of the drum. The second story is about a woman he get hold of Pye extract which is a powerful love potion. It gives her complete power over the men who drink it, but always with fatal results. Story #3 is a detective story about a girl who was found hanging in a warehouse. Convinced she was murdered a young detective finds out too late that she cleverly committed suicide by standing on blocks of ice with a noose around her neck. Rated IIB 2001 Thai w/subtitles

Baron von Munchausen This Terry Gilliam classic recounts the tales of histories most extravagant adventurer. The Baron and his friends perform the most extraordinary feats with aplomb. Recommended for fans of Time Bandits. rated PG 1989 126 minutes

Basketball Diaries Jim Carrol's autobiography of growing up as a Catholic School Basketball star. Even if you disliked Romeo & Juliet and Titanic; Leonard DiCaprio makes a pretty convincing whining junkie. Jim Carrol did most of the soundtrack and he even does a cameo role that's way too reminiscent of Drugstore Cowboy .

Basket Case I&II What's in the basket? His brother, who was connected to him but is now just a head on a stump. He will not be ignored. The sequel is even worse than the original.

Le Battement D'ailes Du Pappilon / Happenstance / (The beating of the butterfly's wings) A film about coincidence and how a small action can ripple through many peoples lives. The whole thing is explained in detail by an old man in the park but basically Irene (Audrey Tautou of Amelie fame) learns of her horoscope while riding the Metro to work. She is a poor appliance salesperson whose life brushes an Algerian restaurant owner, a philandering husband, two long lost lovers, a pickpocket, a homeless man and a pathological liar. Written and direct by Laurent Firode it is amusing if not comic and has that smirking charm that Tautou brought to Amelie. 97 minutes French 2000 Rated R

Battle Royale Think Japanese "Lord of The Flies" with lethal weapons. This is the final film of director Kinju Fukasaku and it met with a frosty reception in Japan where it was deemed too critical of the current political/social situation in the country. Perhaps it's also a bit too violent as it garnered a III rating (18 and over) which is usually reserved for porn films. Anyway, compulsory education is eradicated in Japan and a few adults feel the kids are out of control. As part of a social experiment, a whole high school class is flown to a deserted island and given three days to kill one another. There can only be one survivor or everyone dies. Get it, kind of a deadly reality show. The kids soon turn feral and after day one the 42 students are whittled down to 30. Each kid has a different weapon, from a pot lid to an M16 and you get to accrue weapons as you murder your classmates. Sound like fun, maybe Fox will pick up the rights for next season. Rated III, Japanese w/subtitles, 2001 90 min approx.

Baxter The star of this movie is a dog a French speaking bull terrier who always gets what he wants. His first owner is an old woman whom he kills to get  more interesting and active owners. His new owners are great fun until they have a child. Baxter is put up for adoption after he tries to kill their son. His third owner is a disturbing Nazi obsessed little boy who puts Baxter through his paces. Slightly disturbing. Thanks to Dustin Miller for the recommendation.  French/Dog w/subtitles 1991 Unrated

Being There Peter Sellers is magnificent as the hapless Chauncey Gardener. Chauncey has spent his entire life within the confines of a Victorian Philadelphia house and garden. When he is released into the world, his only reference point is what he has seen on television. Before long he is the president of the United States. Extremely funny and damning. From the Jerzey Kosinski novel. 1908 124 minutes rated PG

Being John Malkovich Craig Schwartz ( John Cussack )is an under appreciated puppeteer who finally decides it is time to get a  paying job. He interviews with the Lester Corp as a filing clerk on the 7 1/2 th floor of the Merton Flimmer building. It is an unusual place, with low ceilings and eccentric occupants.  At home, things are even stranger.  Craig's wife , Lotti, is a frowzy pet shop owner, a rather unflattering part for the usually gorgeous Cameron Diaz. They live in a house full of chimps, parrots lizards and other species. As Craig settles in to his filing tasks, he develops a thing foe Maxine ( Catherine Keener) his attractive office mate.   Smitten, Craig creates a Maxine puppet to express his true feeling to her wooden counterpart. His unrequited love lead them into a business partnership that is unorthodox to say the least. They discover a half door that leads into John Malkovich's head. You can actually be John Malkovich  and when it's over you get spit out alongside the New Jersey Turnpike. 2000 Rated R 

Before the Rain Almost everyone will need the sub-titles to get a handle on the dialog in this Macedonian/Albanian film directed by Milcho Manchevski. There are three interwoven tales that bring out the disparity and animosity between the Albanian/moslem community that shares Macedonia with the Macedonian/Christian community. A Pulitzer Prize winning photographer returns to his old home town and find a violent division in his once peaceful village. In another story, a young novitiate harbors a runaway Albanian girl in his monastery cell. The third tale is about a London woman whose life is irreversibly intertwined with the Balkan problems. It is an interesting film that exposes a regional problem in a very personal way. 1994 Rated R 112 minutes Subtitled in English

Benny and Joon Mary Stuart Masterson is Joon, a slightly off kilter artist who lives with her brother Benny (Aidan Quinn). When she's left alone, Joon tries to direct traffic with a ping pong paddle while dressed in scuba gear. Benny is trying real hard not to institutionalize his sister, but housekeepers seldom make it through the first day. Until, that is, they acquire Sam ( Johnny Depp) in a poker game. Depp's Buster Keatonisms and Chaplin routines are worth the price of the rental fee. 1993 Rate PG 98 minutes. Thanks to Richard Greaf II and his sister who recommended this film

Best In Show This time Christopher Guest turns his sarcastic sites on the dog show world. Basically the same cast as "Guffman" a yuppie couple, a redneck, a NY Gay couple and a childless midwest husband and wife all descend with their pooches on a mock Westminster dog show. We follow each of them as they prepare and travel to the show and as they compete. As usual guest is both accurate and unforgiving in his hilarious portrayal of this American subculture. On tape soon. 2000 Rated PG13

Big Deal On Madonna Street Marrcello Mastroianni leads a gang of truly bumbling Italian thieves in this comedy directed by Mario Monicello. 1960 B&W 90 minutes unrated Italian w/subtitles

The Big Empty First time Director Jack Perez puts a new twist on the hard boiled detective story. Lloyd Meadows is not quite sure why he is a detective, but he waits patiently for his next divorce job. A rather vulnerable Jane Danforth hires him to trail her social worker husband, Peter. Peter appears to be an angel, so Lloyd starts messing with his mind. Before long the lonely detective has pried Jane away and made Peter the lonely party. This is another First Rites directorial debut film. 96 minute Unrated 2000

The Big Lebowski Someday they'll make a movie and Steve Buscemi will not be in it. He's never the star, but here he plays Donny, an idiot bowling buddy of "The Dude" (Jeff Bridges) and Walter (John Goodman) . Joel and Ethan Coen threw this together with all the money left over from Fargo; and if it catches you in the right mood, it is a funny film. The Dude is a has been 60's activist that gets sucked into a kidnapping plot. He gets paid to recover Julianne Moore, who may have been snatched by a band of German rock and roll nihilists ( one is played by "Flea"). It gets a little goofy but the cameos make it worth watching. John Turturro plays Jesus the flamenco bowling pederast and Sam Elliot steals the show with his allotted 5 minutes. Ben Gazarra is a sleazoid Bob Guccione type . T Bone Burnett selected the music for the kick ass soundtrack. Lots of cool characters with a little bit of a story.1998 117 Minutes Rated R

Big Night Two immigrant brothers try their hand as restaurateurs in Atlantic City in the 1950's. The elder brother, Primo is a temperamental chef while the younger of the pair Segundo is a masterful Maitre'd. Business is poor and they stake their hopes on serving a memorable meal to a well known Italian performer. 1996 110 minutes Rated R

The Big Split The story of a relationship gone wrong, then right by new director Martin Hynes. Very realistic, if you've been there you'll be able to relate. A First Rites Film. 87 Minute unrated 

The Big Tease Colin Ferguson is a talented Scottish hairdresser that receives an invite to a major coiffure competition held in LA. He has a tough time absorbing the LA lifestyle and makes them play by his rules. It is a scissor sharp dissection of the west coast and the  narcissistic  fashion community. Did I mention he was gay? Lots of fun if you are in the mood. Rated PG 13  1999 about 90 minutes.

The Bird People of China It is awfully hard to classify the work of Japanese director Takashi Miike. In this one, a young business man is commandeered to travel up to northern Hunan in search of a rumored jade mine. Enroute, he realizes there is a yakuza on his tail and perhaps there's more to this mine than his boss let on. As the trip becomes more arduous the two team up just to survive, until they eventually reach their destination. Along the way, they hear rumors of people who can fly and when they arrive, there is a great deal of evidence to support the stories. After slowing to the rural pace the two men become less concerned with the jade and more interested in the rich village life. When the time comes to return to civilization, they must face the dilemma of bringing modernization to the last unspoiled place in China. Japanese Rated 1

Bitter Moon Roman Polanski really knows how to make a degenerate movie. If you think Hugh Grant is a twit, wait till you see him in this one. Grant is seduced away from his wife by a French siren (Emmanuelle Seigner) and her paraplegic husband. You might find this in the "Adult" section of your video store. 1992 140 min Rated R

A Bittersweet Life How far will you go for love? This is a true test of a young mobsters resolve, as he is asked to look after him masters girlfriend for a few days. When he catches her with another man, he does the wrong thing and is asked to pay with his life. There still another hour and a half left in the film, so needless to say, he doesn't die so quickly. This is a really funny, entertaining, violent and romantic Korean mobster film. The cinematography is superb and eventually some American studio will buy the rights to this story and screw it up. Directed by Kim Joo Woon  2005 Korean 2 hours

Black & White We have a copy but haven't gotten around to reviewing it

Black Male Bill is a twisted English twit but an accomplished serial murderer until he falls in love with Heather. He only wants to keep her happy. He finds her a real nice house by killing the occupants, and drugs her when he has things to do. Heathers boyfriend is hot on their trail and just about everyone dies by the end. Mildly amusing. Filmed in Danbury, Connecticut if you care.  90 Minutes 1999 

Blade Runner Harrison Ford before he became Jack Ryan is quite good in this aging sci-fi movie. I only mention it because it's been spiffed up and re released on DVD. Taken from the brilliant book Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep by the late and great Philip K. Dick.

Blood and Roses Mel Ferrer as a Vampire ? This is one of many film versions of the novel Carmilla. 1961 Italian 90 minutes unrated.

Blood Simple Joel and Ethan Cohens'  first full length film is due to be re-released this summer. This is a great thriller which has strains of Fargo in it's twisty plot. A younger Francis McDormand runs off from her nasty barkeeper husband played by Danny Hadaya. A plot for revenge backfires more than once and will leave you guessing the outcome. Worth a re-viewing if you saw it 17 years ago when it first came out. 96 minutes Rated R 1983

Bloody Beach 8 internet buddies rent a beach house together and head out of Seoul for a summer of fun. One is dead before she even gets off the train. By the second night, they are almost all chopped up, stabbed, run over or fallen victim to some fatal mishap. It can all attributed to "Sandmanzz" who was a malignant chat room buddy of the group. We suspect this is a Korean remake of a bad American film. Watch this only if you need another good reason to quit AOL.

Blue Velvet Dennis Hopper at his strangest in this David Lynch creepfest with Kyle McLaughlin, Laura Dern and the stunning Isabella Rosalini. 1986 Rated R 1986 

Bottle Rocket Digman is a wholesale loser who attempts to assemble a second class criminal team. They manage to rob a Barnes and Noble of their petty cash, but bungle anything more complex. Directed by Wes Andersson, with the entire Wilson family (Owen, Luke, Andrew and Teddy) in the cast. 1996 Rated R 99 minutes Thanks to Tuco200 for the recommendation. 10/98

A Boy's Life A biographical film from Tobias Wolff's book of the same title. Jack is dragged across the country by his loopy mom who is always trying to reshape her life. She latches on to Dwight (Robert DeNiro) as the perfect husband and father for her growing boy. Jack's mom has always been a poor judge of character and this proves to be one of her larger mistakes. Dwight is the step dad from hell. Aside from being a domineering asshole, Dwight is never wrong, never kind and he steals the money from Jack's paper route. It's all the more tragic, because you know it actually happened. Leonardo DiCaprio can almost be forgiven for "Titanic" after this excellent job as the young Mr. Wolff. Thanks to Jason Koenigsknecht for the recommendation

Brassed Off They closed the coal pits, everyone is broke and only the Grimley Colliery Band is left to give them pride. This is a blatant feel good movie but it does have Ewan McGregor and it is a true story. It is also a poke in the eye to the Tory government, which was well deserved. 1990 Rated R British  90 minutes

Brazil  Michael Palin, Jonathan Pryce, Katherine Hellmond and Robert DeNiro are the major names in this futuristic Terry Gilliam epic. Poor Mr.Buttle has been expunged by the master computer. They take him away and he ceases to exist. Pryce is Sam who is promoted to the Ministry of Information through his mother's social machinations. He encounters Jill who is trying to find out what became of Buttle. She is literally the woman of his dreams and he falls for her and her cause. It seems Sam's friend and coworker,  Michael Palin as Jack, had accidentally killed Buttle while interrogating him.  Bob Hoskins and Robert DeNiro have great parts as plumbers. You might want to buy this one, because you will have to rent it five or six times to get a handle on the story. The full 142 minute version is now available in a boxed DVD set versus the standard 131 minute US 1985 release. The extra footage actually adds a lot to the story. Rated R  

Breaking News A rather cynical look at how the media has perverted police work. A group of detectives are filmed in a gun battle with some tough triad members. They get the short end of the stick and look bad on that nights news. To regain public trust, Inspector Rebecca orchestrates a media circus around the capture of the gang. The criminals are a wee bit smarter than their captors and although good triumphs over evil in the end it was a close race. Cantonese w/subtitles rated IIb 2004

Bringing Out The Dead Nicolas Cage is an unraveling New York City ambulance driver in this Martin Scorcese offering. Patricia Arquette is Mary Burke, the ex-junkie love interest whose father suffered a heart attack. The sound track is kick ass but the story is a bit over the top, as New York never gets as wild as Martin would have us believe. Cage has recurring visions of a street kid that died on him, which lends itself to some overblown hallucination sequences. Some of the ambulance scenes are reminiscent of an episode of the Monkees. John Goodman is his usual self as Cage's ambulance partner. Cage fans will stick with this one to the end but the rest of you shouldn't  even load the tape in your VCR. Rated R  121 Minutes 1999

Broken English The burgeoning New Zealand film industry has given us a new twist on cross cultural love stories. A transplanted Croatian beauty, Nina (Aleksandra Vujcic) forms a romantic alliance with a Maori , Eddy, (Julian Arahanga) against the strong wishes of her old world father ( Rade Serbedzua). It smacks a little of a quirky Montague/Capulet plot I once read, but hey, how many Kiwi films have you seen? Skip the Blockbuster "R" version and go for the NC-17 cut if you can find it. What good is a love story without the steam.? 1997 Tristar 92 minutes

Broken Flowers This may be the best film Bill Murray is in since Stripes. For director Jim Jarmusch, this is a low key story, with a minimum of dialog, a little travel (almost exclusively in New Jersey) and 5 ex-girlfriends. Don Johnston (with a 't') has a dull bored suburban existence till he get's an anonymous letter informing him that he has a 19 year old son. His inquisitive Ethiopian neighbor, Winston/ Jeffrey Wright feels it is time for a quest, so he supplies Don with an itinerary and sends him on a quest. Don visits his old girlfriends, beginning with Sharon Stone and her aptly named daughter, Lolita. Next stop is Frances Conroy a childless real estate agent, Jessica Lange and Julie Delpy. Cool story enmeshed in a minimalist film without a suitable ending. Great stuff. 2005 rated R 2005 106 minutes

Brother The Yakuza follow a Japanese hybrid of Mafiosi and Samurai traditions and have spawned their own sub-class of Japanese gangster cinema. Director Takeshi Kitano, breaks out of the yakuza film stereotype in this tale of a Tokyo mobster who is forces to flee to Los Angeles. After a few days in a seedy hotel, Yamamoto makes contact with his low rent brother and by the end of the week, they have wrestled control the local drug distribution from some badass Mexicans. By the end of the next week, they have eradicated the competition and control a chunk of the city. This boy is ruthless, even by American thug standards. With a little difficulty, they merge with the reigning Japantown crime lord to become a force to reckon with. Drawing attention from the Italians, they are asked for a 50% kick back to The Mob. That's a bit too much for Yamamoto and before long they "go to the mattresses" in an all out war. It is both a brutal and and stylish confrontation, but you sense that for Yamamoto, it is a form of ritual suicide. This is a very good film and recommended, especially if  you like gangster stuff. Japanese & Englishw/subtitles Rated III 90 min

Brother From Another Planet Early Jon Sayles story of a black alien who gets pulled into some very funny situations after landing in New York. This would have made a good 1/2 hour Twilight Zone but tends to wear thin after an hour. 104 minutes 1984 

Buddha Mar Gaya Also titled  in English as You will die laughing, this might well be the Hindi version of Weekend at Bernie's. A highly irreverent look at Indian funeral practices and low comedy. It was difficult toreally know what we watched since our copy was bought on the street in Bombay and had no discernable sub titles. It may actually be a decent film, but we don't have a clue. Directed by Rahul Rawail

Buena Vista Social Club Director Wim Wenders teamed up with guitarist Ry Cooder to document the legendary and underappreciated musicians of Cuban popular music. It is a revival of past stars who have been neglected during the long years of Cubas isolation. The great music is made even better when you sense the joy wenders captures from these lifelong performers. 1999 Spanish w/subtitles 100 minutes

Buffalo 66 Vincent Gallo is the director/writer/star in a film about one of the stupidest people ever born. Billy Brown gets out of jail and can't even find a place to take a leak. He kidnaps Cristina Ricci and takes her home to prove to his parents he is not a loser. But he is and they don't care anyway, because they're too busy watching Buffalo play football. We're informed via flashback, that Billy went to jail because he made a large and ill advised bet on the same team. Two things are definite, upstate New York is depressing in the winter and Ricci is a good actress.  This movie may actually be brilliant.? 1998 Rated R Thanks to Wilbur177 for the suggestion 4/99

burnzy's last call A one day snapshot in a downtown New York bar. The director Michael de Avila knows his subject and he gets a host of cameos in his cinematic bar room. As a veteran barkeep, de Avila has a good handle on his subject and he has condensed his 15 years of anecdotes into one night. Burnzy is an elder patron who starts his drinking daily at 10 am and has occupied the same stool since 1956. He stays in place as yuppies, weirdoes, David Johansen, drag queens, Sherry Stringfield,  cops and bookies come and go. Through it all, Burnzy drinks his short beers. Johansen plays Andre the vile artist bum who is just too gross to believe. Sal the bartender is a teetotaler whom Andre likens to a diabetic in a candy store. Sal (James Mc Caffrey) makes him the drink to end all drinks. Watch this one when you're feeling thirsty. Burnzy sticks it out to closing time and you should to. You'll find it in the First Rites section. Enjoy the superb close up shots of fizzy drinks and cigarette smoke and the great sound track. 88 minutes 2000 Unrated A first rites film

The Butcher Boy Francie Brady has an easy life at home with his drunken dad and suicidal mom. If only Mrs. Nugent had not called him a pig. Pigs are a recurring theme in this totally Irish film adapted from Patrick McCabe's novel of the same name. In his childish way, Francie holds the wealthier Mrs. Nugent (Fiona Shawn) responsible for the bad things in his life, and he sets out from the start to make her and her son pay. In addition to pigs, the director Neil Jordan, has artfully worked JFK, atomic bombs and the Virgin Mary into almost every scene. In fact the incarnation of Mary is played by the ultimate Irish person, Sinead O'Conner. With that one exception, the acting is superb, and Eammon Owens is perfect as the young Francie. Stephen Rey plays Da Brady and Aisling O'Sullivan is Ma. 1997 Geffen Pictures 85 Minutes Rated R Thanks Danny for the suggestion. 11/98

C

Cabin Boy I don't know why, but this movie is really funny. Maybe Chris Elliott is always funny, no matter how bad the script. You don't need to watch this one through to the end because it's obvious Tim Burton ran out of ideas half way. The first half is just too stupid to miss.

The Castle The Kerrigan family is a strange bunch and although they are far from dysfunctional none of them are playing with a full deck. Perhaps it's the hazardous waste buried in their yard or the radar from the adjacent  airport that makes them so dim. Things at chez Kerrigan were going along fine until the local council forecloses on the Kerrigan estate to make way for a new runway.  Well Dad Kerrigan reckons a man's home is his inviolable castle and has no idea where they get off. A battle ensues. Ignore the happy ending and watch it for Aussie and anti-lawyer  humor/humour.  Directed by Rob Sitch, this might be construed as an Australian version of "The Stupids" .  84 Minutes Rated R 1998 

Cellophane Marianne is asked to destroy some letters, but she is too much of a journalist to do it without reading them. Her curiosity reopens a 25 year old murder case in which her father was implicated. She returns to her small Swedish town of Skokland in an attempt to clear her dying father and perhaps solve the case.  Swedish w/subtitles 1997 OAT1 

Central Station What a pleasure to see a film where the sets are all real, the actors are not all stunning and the language is Portuguese. A boy, Josuae is left to a life in the streets after his mother is struck by a bus in front of the Rio de Janeiro terminal. After a few days he is begrudgingly befriended by a tough old woman, Dora, who works at the terminal as a letter writer. She takes the kid home then sells him to a syndicate for organ transplants. Her neighbor intercedes and guilts Dora into retrieving the kid before he is harvested. She ends up stealing the kid and the go on the lam. Even in translation, you get good idea of the distrusting love that grows between them. 1998 Unrated 120 minutes Brazilian Portuguese w/subtitles. 8/99

Character Or more precisely Karakter in it's original Dutch, this is a strange ass story of an illegitimate son raised by his mother. That would have been fine, but their paths constantly pass with the boys wealthy and nasty father. Be forewarned, the high quality of the shadowy photography and the weird sound of the gargling Dutch may work their way into your dreams. The boy, Kazadreufe is haunted, sued and harassed by the evil Drevenhaven who is trying to harden his son to the world. Undoubtedly better on the big screen, you may be lucky enough to find a single copy in your video store. 1997 125 minutes Rater R Dutch with English subtitles

Chappaqua In hindsight an awful lot of counter culture movies from the sixties were sloppy self indulgent junk. Maybe the audiences were too stoned to notice, but most of them now seem merely confusing. Chappaqua is no exception. Pedigreed as a genuine hip film it has an all star  cast with William Burroughs, Allen Ginsberg, Jean Louis Barroult, Swami Satchidanandi, Ravi Shankar, the Fugs and Paulette Pritchard. Essentially, it is a cinematic translation of the drug rehab diaries of a spoiled rich kid, Russel Hawrith from Chappaqua, NY. Director Conrad Rook takes us on a trip through Times Square, Paris, and Central Park with lots of odd camera angles and double exposures. Essentially, we are watching Harwith's hallucinations as he goes through drug withdrawal at a posh Swiss clinic. Maybe I'm just jealous, it appears they had a great time filming this and Rook concocted the story  by splicing all his pointless footage together. I highly recommend it and many thanks to all of you who brought this gem to our attention. 1966 B&W  82 minutes Unrated

Chasing Amy Clerks was brilliant, then these guys got some money to make a full blown color film. They didn't waste the money or the opportunity. Ben Affleck is a New Jersey comic book creator that is smitten by fellow comic artist Joey Luaren Adams. He continues to pursue her even after she professes her preference for women. Love makes a serious attempt at conquering all, even sexual preference. Most of the Clerks cast can be found here, too. 1997 Rated R 112 minutes 10/98

Chicks Man Possibly a film about men's inability to fathom the mysteries of women. Directed by Jeremy Wagener. Supposedly this won the Savannah Film festival, I guess we missed that one. 93 minutes unrated 2000

Le Chien Andalou Salvador Dali had a hand in this off-the-charts strange film that is the cinematic portrayal of something only he understood.

Children of the Revolution Judy Davis is great as Joan Fraser the ultimate leftist whose affair with Joe Stalin is the death of the old autocrat. When she returns to Australia and marries one of her old communist chums (played by Geoffrey Rush), she is already pregnant with Stalin's child. Little Joe grows up unsure who his real dad is until the resemblance becomes obvious to all. Sam Neil is pretty good as the double agent and F. Murray Abraham does a plausible and funny Stalin. Directed by Peter Duncan. 1996 Rated R 101 minutes

Circus Leo has lots of problems and he could use some cash to solve them. His bookie (Eddie Izzard) wants to get paid, his brother is screwing his wife and a hit man is convinced Leo killed his girlfriend. Leo is on the run from a variety of British thugs while trying to run the biggest scam of his career. Pretty high paced but not quite a Guy Ritchie film. British 2000 Rated R 95 minutes

City of God (Cidade De Deus)  Rocket is a wannabe photojournalist who lives in a particularly rough favala in Rio. He moderates this amusing and violent story of a gang war in his neighborhood. It is well written, well filmed and especially horrific because it is based on a true story. These thugs can never win and most kids from this neighborhood are destined to die before they reach old age from a combination of ignorance, drugs and violence. Very very very good especially if you like gang stories.  Directed by Fernando Meirelles 2 hours Rated R Brazilian Portuguese w/subtitles

City of Lost Children  Directed by the team of Jeanette/Caro you can't help but think of Brazil as you watch this thing. Very funny mad scientist story about a family of clones that kidnap children so they can record their dreams for one of their members. Wild sets and courageous children who fight off the freaks with the aid of a circus giant. Also check out Delicatessen by the same guys. 1995 120 min rated R subtitled/French

The Classic  Most Korean films are either astoundingly brutal or ridiculous schoolgirl ghost stories. So when we found this endless Korean romance, it seemed worth a mention. It tells the tale of a threesome Joon-ha, Tae-soo and their girlfriend Joo-hee who had a lengthy and tortuous romance that spanned two generations. The story is told through a series of flashbacks as their daughter reads old love letters and diaries from her parents courtship. Well told, well filmed, a bit long at 118 minutes but good fodder for hopeless romantics. Korean 2003 Zhao Cheng You.

Clean, Shaven I'm still looking for this one recommended to us by Ola Lundin Anyone know where to find a copy?

Clerks You take a pack of Jersey shore losers that work in a convenience store and the video store next to it and you show us just how funny they can be, despite their boring miserable lifestyle and pointless existence. It works really well. 1994 90 min B&W 

A Clockwork Orange An honorable mention to this Kubrick adaptation of the Anthony Burgess novel about future punks. Malcolm (not Roddy) McDowell is at his best and scariest in this one. Watch it again and see if it still makes you unsettled . 137Minutes Rated R 1971.

Cold Dog Soup If you liked "Rubin & Ed", here's another dead pet movie to round out your weekend. Michael gets picked up at a health club and invited home to dinner. He's in for a 'pressure cooker" of an evening until Jasper, the family mutt chokes to death on an anchovy. Being a nice guy,our hero volunteers to bury th pooch in the park. He bags the dog, leaves Sarah and her mom, and hails a cab for the park. This is not just any cab, this one is driven by Randy Quaid. Quaid talks Michael into selling the dead dog rather than burying him. The rest of the film is spent careening through the city (what city?) trying to get a few bucks for Jasper. In a stupid sort of way, this is all very funny. From Handmade films (What happened to them?) Frank Whaley is Mike, Christine Harnos is Sarah and Mushroom the dog is Jasper. 1989 PG 13 90 minutes

Colour Blossoms In the mood for a trans-sexual murder, S&M, tri-lingual triangular ghost love story? Madam Umeki Satoko is a fading Japanese film star who takes a liking to a beautiful young real estate agent, Miss Meili. The actress buys a ten million dollar home at the top of Hong Kong on the condition Meili can locate a tenant for her other apartments in Princess Terrace. Captivated by the elegance of her client, she soon discovers that finding the "right tenant" will not be a simple task. This could almost be a travelogue as the main character sashays up and down Hong Kong's streets always meeting the glance of a silent handsome policeman or the embrace of her Tokyo photographer/male model paramour, Kim. Toss in some S&M, a hint of homosexuality, a trace of trans-gender mysticism, an old murder and some rain and you have an undecipherable mess. Written and directed by Yonfan with production help from Fruit Chan. This must be some kind of fantasy romance film that is just neither bizarre nor erotic enough for our jaded tastes. Japanese, Cantonese and bad English poetry with a Hindi soundtrack. Starring Teresa Cheung, Matsuzaka Keiko and Harisu 2004

The Cook, The Thief, The Lover, The.... Not to give anything away, but this is probably the most appetizing corpus delecti ever served up in a film. The sets and cinematography are a might strange and you may find it takes some perseverance to stick it out to the end.

Cosi Director Mark Joffe employs a terrific cast in this comedy about a theatrical production at an asylum. Lewis gets the job as the director and is way in over his head. He enlists his best friend to try and bring a little theater experience as he has none.His cast are all characters in their own rite, including, Barry Otto as Roy an indomitable thespian who wants them to enact Cosi Fan Tutti.  The only problem is no one speaks Italian and no one can sing. It was meant to be a stop gap job for Lewis but the infectious enthusiasm of his cast draws him in. His girlfriend, Lucy (Rachel Griffith from Six Feet Under) is an un-supportive law student. Art replicates life as Lewis' friend bets him that Lucy is fooling around similar to the opera's plot. The production is great. Look for Toni Collette form Muriel's Wedding as Julie the voluntary patient. Rated R 100 minutes Australian 1998

Crash Not to be confused with the Cronenburg film, this is a contemporary story of life in LA. It is a series of interwoven tales that portray the good, bad and indifferent aspects of American life. Loaded with stars, this is not typical Hollywood fare and it left me feeling a trifle depressed by the time the credits rolled. Look for Sandra Bullock, Don Cheadle, Matt Dillon, Jennifer Esposito, Brendan Fraser, Ludascris, Thandie Newton, Ryan Phillippe and Larenz Tate. Directed by Paul Haggis who does a good job of handling all this talent and keeping the story moving. Lots of surprises. 2004  100 minute

Crash If you are slightly unbalanced behind the wheel, please skip this movie. Somehow they manage to connect eroticism to car crashes in a way that might appeal to a few of us. Maybe it's the subliminal images of beautiful people ( Holly Hunter, James Spader, Roseann Arquette, Elias Koteas, Deborah Unger) fornicating between car crashes that connects those synapses. Anyway, the NC-17 version is the one to see. Absolutely all sexual combinations are explored. Remember that car wash fantasy you always had? All you Canadians will recognize the QEW, that's one really sexy road. Excellent cars. Directed by David Cronenburg because Naked Lunch was not extreme enough. 1996 100/90 Min NC-17/R

Crawlspace For Klaus Kinski fans only. Klaus crawls around in the attic. Why? Who knows. 1986 80 minutes rated R

Crazy in Alabama Antonio Banderas direct his wife, Melanie Griffiths,  in this dual tale of Aunt Lucille and the civil rights movement in the early 60's . It seems Aunt Lucille poisoned her husband and cut off his head with an electric carving knife. She sticks him in a Tupperware© cake tote and keeps him around for consolation. Taken from the Mark Childress novel, Melanie's southern accent is a trifle annoying, but hell so is mine. 1999 Rated PG13 88 min

Creep This is a first film by the young and enthusiastic British director Christopher Smith. It is your basic horror film with a tall blond woman looking over her shoulder as she runs away from a homicidal freak. The setting is the London Underground, the running starlet is Franka Potente (Yeah from Osbourne Conspiracy) and the mutant is a leftover science experiment from some subterranean medical lab. Good location shots and lots of jump out of your seat moments. Save it for when you are in the mood for a good drive-in movie. 2004 English 85 minutes

Criminal Gus is a middle aged accountant who embezzles a few bucks to help buy his family a new home. Off course his is not very good at anything, least of all crime, and he quickly gets caught. He takes his son and runs off to upstate New York. It is beautifully shot in black and white by Wolfgang Held which amplifies the depressing qualities of this poor schmucks life. 77 minutes Unrated 1994

Cronos An old watchmaker finds a curios clockwork device that has some sinister qualities. He starts acting younger and pretty soon he gets a hankering for blood. There's an odd South American slant to this film which is in Spanish intermixed with English. A nice twist from the standard vampire fare. 1992 color 92 minutes rated R

Cross My Heart and Hope to Die Otto is the odd man out. Perhaps throwing a rock at the referee's head really was a bad idea but growing up is filled with wrong decisions. This is a Norwegian version of  a  favorite cinematic theme, the coming of age film.. Since very few of us have a Norwegian perspective on growing up, it is enlightening. Not your usual happy ending boy meets girl storyline, Otto gets more of a slap in the face rather than a pat on the ass to nudge him  into adulthood. Very different and very good. 96 minutes, Norwegian w/subtitles unrated

Cross Fire Junko Aoiki has pyrokinetic powers. When her friend’s sister is killed by a bunch of rich punks, she decides to immolate them, single-handedly. This Japanese teen horror has so much moral baggage you’ll think you’re watching an American 50’s horror film. It’s refreshing to see a powerful, assertive female character in a Japanese production even if she is a homicidal bitch with flame throwing powers. The police are hot on her trail and you know she has to die but it’s done with aplomb. Japanese w/subtitles  116 min 2000 rated IIB 

Cruel Story of Youth Director Nagisa Oshima's Japanese juvenile delinquent movie is an Asian offshoot of the James Dean genre. Mayo has fun hitching rides with business men and shaking them down when they hit on her. She and her boyfriend make it into a nice business until the police intervene. Love does not prevail in this Romeo and Juliet update and they must pay for their social indiscretions. The photography is good but the social pressures and taboos seem a bit obscure. 1960 Color Japanese with English subtitles Unrated

Crumb This movie got lots of praise when it first came out, but we chose to ignore it. It is excellent, and all those nice things and top ten listings were right on the money. Robert Crumb is a reclusive comic book artist who was seminal in the underground comic world of the 1960/70s. Even if the name is unfamiliar, you will recognize his work or at least his distinctive pen and ink style. Terry Zwigoff directed and David Lynch produced this brutally honest documentary of Roberts twisted family and home life. You get a sense that Roberts twisted artwork is really indicative of his world view. This is a  very open and apparently accurate film that supports the connection between psychosis and genius. You may catch yourself rethinking this film for days afterward. 1994 Rated R 119 minutes 

Cube A bunch of strangers wake up inside against Rubics Cube. They must join forces to try and get out without getting annihilated by the fiendish devices hidden in the rooms. Very surreal, science fiction story that does not insult your intelligence. Maybe they'll make a sequel. 90 minutes 1997 rated R

Curdled A young woman's obsession with murder lures her into a job cleaning up crime scenes and soon she crosses paths with a local serial killer, bringing her dangerously close to her subject of fascination. This is an amazing screen play that draws one into Gabriella's world and holds you there until the grizzly end. Grab you latex gloves and join in her "danse macabre", it's a tango you will never forget. Starring William Baldwin, Directed by Reb Braddock. 1996 Rated R 94 minutes Recommended and reviewed by Kim Danbert. Thanks Kim, we liked it too.

D

Dark City Did someone say "Film Noir" ? If your curious about just how dark you can make a film and still have a visible image ( but not necessarily an intelligible story) check this out. The plot is the standard failing alien civilization wants to conquer earth scenario. Unlike Mars Attacks, these Nosferatu look-alikes use memory control as their tool. Keiffer Sutherland overacts his role as the complicit limping Dr. Schreber but the rest of the cast are OK. This is a niche movie which you'll enjoy if you liked Spawn or The Crow or niches. 1997 Rated R 98 minutes 1/99

Dark Water Unbeknownst to most of us, there is a well developed school of Asian horror films that rival or surpass Hollywood's recent crop of psycho thrillers. Dark Water is just one example. These modern day ghost stories are scary as hell, and they do it without assistance from Stephen King. This Japanese offering, directed by Nakata Hideo, has a tense style and close photography that bears little resemblance to it's American counterparts. Yoshimi, a recently divorced mother, is struggling to keep her daughter and herself on track. That rent a rundown apartment is a poorly maintained apartment building, where they try to set up house. A worrisome water stain on the bedroom ceiling is our first indication that this place was a poor choice. Your first reaction might be to attribute the heightening weirdness to Yoshimis' stress and active imagination. Before long, however, her adorable 5 year old daughter  begins having visions and is sent home from school when she passes out. The stain begins to grow and the fact that another little girl has gone missing from Ikiko's kindergarten only makes things worse. The foreboding never lets up, but it accelerates so slowly you can hardly perceive the change. It's not long before the dripping ceiling has you worried too and you're giving Ikuko advice about staying away from the tub. Ringu is perhaps the only film that has crossed over into American cinema (as The Ring) from this wealth of spooky Asian ghost stories, but it is just one of many excellent titles that are worth ferreting out. . We'll keep listing them as we find copies. Japanese w/subtitles 102 minutes Rated IIb  We just heard Hollywood bought the rights and is planning to screw it up

Days of Being Wild This stylish Hong Kong Film is about a rather smooth young man who lives with his wealthy aunt. He delicately balances two distinctively different girlfriends and his aunt as he pisses his life away. Eventually, his legs get kicked out from under him.  Directed by Wong Kar Wei, this won the Hong Kong Best Directors award . The translation is a little rough at times but the tale is sound, torrid and very slickly done. Cantonese w/subtitles Rated II 94 minutes

Dead Alive So many people wrote in about this film, that we could no longer ignore it. Director Peter Jackson put together this New Zealand spoof which would do George Romero proud. Lionel played by Timothy Balme is a hen pecked son of a Wellington socialite. He falls for Piquita, a Spanish grocery clerk played by Diana Penalver. He takes her to the zoo where his mom gets bitten by a hairless rat monkey. Before long Mom is a zombie and so is anyone she bites. Sound familiar ? Well, this one is over the top for blood, guts, gore and more blood. It could make a morgue attendant gag. At one point Lionel takes an upturned power mower to a roomful of zombies complete with splat and squishing noises. A real Zombie jamboree. If you like this Doug Randell recommends Jackson's earlier work entitled "Bad Taste" . 1992 Unrated

Dead Fall An awful con man movie with Nicolas Cage and James Coburn. They should be ashamed of themselves for this stinker. Cameos by Peter Fonda and Charlie Sheen were no help, whatsoever. 99 minutes Rated R 1993

Dead Man Jim Jarmusch gets off to a quiet start with this black and white western. He got Johnny Depp to play William Blake a Cleveland accountant who wanders west after his parents die. Predictably meek and mild, William manages to catch a bullet that was meant for someone else. He is nursed by an Indian named 'Nobody' who just assumes Depp is the poet William Blake. Blake proceeds to wander around killing people, becoming more adept as he goes. The scenery and the photography are extraordinary. The story is wryly comic though a trifle thin. The cutting dialog and great cinematography more than compensate and the combination will entertain most Jarmusch fans. The all star cast includes Robert Mitchum as a berserk mill owner, Crispin Glover as a walk-on lunatic, Billy Bob Thornton as himself, Iggy Pop as a cowboy in drag, plus Gabriel Byrne and Alfred Molina. 1997 Rated R B & W 121 minutes. 8/99

Dead Pet While Jake was away at Harvard, the family poodle has displaced his parents affection . They regretfully inform Jake, he can't finish school as his tuition went for experimental surgery on Miko, their 13 year old poodle (played by Raindrop). He retires to his room only to find it has been converted into a pink poodle recovery room. Soon after, the poodle dies while in his care. He leaves home, but that is just the start of his problems. Kevin Cotteleer, wrote directed and stars in this funny spoof on just how tough it is to be a twenty something. Reminiscent of "Spanking the Monkey", but far more light hearted. Music by SubLunar 93 minutes unrated1999 

Delicatessen A haute cuisine French comedy directed by JP Jeunet and Marc Caro. A landlord serves his tenants to his tenants in this futurist story of gustatory deprivation. No, we won't stoop to calling it tasty, but it's a winner. If you enjoy this one, find a copy of City of Lost Children or Amelie by the same team. Thanks to Kevin Leep for the recommendations 1991 101 minutes Rated R

Detroit 9000 A blaxploitation movie recommended by that guy who made "Pulp Fiction"

Diary of A Serial Killer Gary Bucey plays a hack magazine writer who trails a serial killer in search of a vicarious thrill/story. Boy was this a lousy movie. Bad writing, insulting gaps and enough clichés to fill out a sit com season. Just possibly this is a lame rip off of Man Bites Dog. Skip it , even if it's on HBO and you're bored.

Dick  If you ever wondered what really happened at Watergate, all is revealed in this comedy that ties up all the loose ends. Danny Hedaya does a great Nixon, although you kind of hope the man was  not that nuts. Kirsten Dunst and Michele Williams and the two teenagers that unwittingly bring down his administration. 94 minutes Rated PG 1999

Dill Scallion The jacket to this this film calls it a country western version of Spinal Tap. Granted, it is a music industry pseudo-documentary, but that's were the similarity ends. Dill (Billy Burke) is a shit kicker school bus driver in central Texas who gets a shot doing radio ads in Nashville. He rockets to the top with Henry Winkler ( I swear I'm not making this up) as his manager. He sings great tunes like "Tube Top Boogie". According to the credits Cheryl Crowe wrote the music. Some of the lyrics are hysterical. Written and directed by Jordan Brady and released on the First Rites label. 1999 Rated PG 91 minutes

The Dinner Game  Once a week, some friends gather for dinner and each of them must bring an idiot along for the others entertainment. Not actually a food film, it does revolve around one particular idiot who builds models from matchsticks. His host sprains his back and cannot escort him so they end up spending a hilarious evening together. Not unlike La Cage aux Folles which shares he same writer/director Francis Veber.. 81 minutes French w/subtitles Rated PG 13

Disco Dancer We are beholding to Adam Dugas for bringing this gem to our attention.  This must be the Bombay equivalent of Saturday Night Fever complete with disco dance extravaganzas that will make your  head spin and leave you hysterical. Johnny is a natural performer, a musician and a dancer. The reigning disco king of India, Sammy, is a drug addict and his manager ( Om Puri)  decides to replace him with Johnny.  A grudge ensues and Sammy tries to electrocute his rival by running wall current through his electric guitar. Things get nuts and Johnny gets his legs broken by some goons just before the world disco championships. What tension. If your a fan of  Indian odd films, this is your cup of tea. Thanks Adam  2 hours+ 1982 Hindi- it needs no subtitles  

The Disappearance of Finbar Finbar Flynn is a housing project kid from Ireland. He gets his big break as a mascot for a pro football team. He's back at the housing project in short order and everybody is giving him a hard time about losing his big chance. His best friend Danny is pleased to have his mate home, at least until Finbar woos his girlfriend away. Tired of all the hassle, Finbar jumps off a highway bridge and totally disappears. A search fails to find his corpse and and a year later, there's still no trace of him, until Danny gets a call. By then, Flynn's story has been converted to a rock video and his story has gone international. Danny sets off to Sweden to link up with his missing friend. Well, that's one way to get out of a dead end life. This suffers a little from poor production, a weak story and perhaps from being a hybrid Irish Swedish graft,, but hey what do we know? Rated 1 Directed by Sue Clayton 100 minutes

Dog Days ( Hundtage ) If you thought suburban American life was banal and pointless, take a peek at the Austrian Biedermanner. There are five storylines cross hatched in this film with only the slimmest thread connecting them. In one a bulimic young woman endures the abuse of her hyper jealous boyfriend, In another a hefty old widower pays his aged putzfrau to put on his wife's clothes and do a striptease for him. You'll never look at your Granny the same after you see that scene. There is also a crazy woman who hitchhikes from scene to scene irritating her benefactors as a leitmotif. Then there's a couple who torment each other sexually since their daughter died in a car accident. She invites men home for the weekend while he throws a tennis ball around the house. In the fourth, a lonely middle aged woman has a flamboyant Polish lover who humiliates and abuses her. While in another story line, a security agent offers up a surrogate as the perpetrator in a crime he can't solve. Basically everybody gets laid but nobody is too thrilled about it. If Tod Solondz spoke German he could have made this film. Anyway, it is, at it's best, a wonderful collection of some truly normal and unglamorous folks having sex. There's no airbrushing in this one, just naked, nasty, old and fat but truly democratic coupling. There is no salvation in any of these tales, just a reminder that love conquers nothing and fancy lingerie is not wasted on older women.  Directed by Ulrich Seidel 1999 Austrian in German with subtitles Rated 18+ probably because of the orgy.

Dogma Obviously, the religious right has no sense of humor if they tried to ban this film. This could be the third movie in the Win Wenders Angel Trilogy except it takes place in New Jersey instead of Berlin. Ben Afleck is a fallen angel who wants to get back into heaven on a technicality. Chris Rock is great as the 13th apostle, Rufus. George Carlin plays the gung ho Cardinal Glick. Alanis Morisette is God and Janeane Garofolo wouldn't miss a part in a Jersey movie. As a bonus, most of the cast of "Clerks" are in this, too. Outstanding comedy that may get a trifle theological at times. 122 minutes Rated R 1999 

Dogs Subtitled The rise and fall of an all girl bookie joint by director Eve Annenberg. This is a tale about Lower East Side NYC female slackers who have a plan to move them over to the lower west side. Leila Wascowicz is so broke, they take her mother's coffin to the cemetery by subway (She died of MSG buildup). After that experience Leila and her roommates decide to go into business. They link up with a Brooklyn bookie who sets them up as a satellite office. It kind of smacks of early Spike Lee, but the idea and the dialogue are pretty entertaining. God save small independent film makers. 85 Minutes 2000 Unrated.

Double Fattiness Apparently, folks in Hong Kong have no problem making fun of heavy people. Short of Eddy Murphy films, this is seldom the basis for a comic film in America. Mom runs a fast food restaurant with her husband and son. She has a heart attack due I guess to her stoutness but cannot get into heaven as the bridge collapses under her weight. She is sent back to earth on a technicality and given a sexy new body, since her old one was cremated. Dad, meanwhile acquires a new beau of ample proportions and cannot understand why this good looking young woman keeps hounding him. Meanwhile, evil real estate goons have plans for the restaurant that do not include the family. If it sounds like a Little Rascals plot, you're pretty close to the mark.

Dracula The 1931 original, with Bela Lugosi is always going to be the best. He defines what a vampire is and everyone since then has been forced to copy his imagery. If you haven't seen this, you have no business even reading this page. If you haven't seen it in a few years, go buy a copy, it deserves an annual viewing. Directed by Todd Browning, who was kind enough to also give us Freaks, it is fairly true to Bram Stokers novel and a far cry from Nosferatu. There's nothing better than a good black and white vampire film.

Bram Stoker's Dracula With this cast -Winona Ryder, Anthony Hopkins, Keanu Reeves and Gary Oldman- you'd think this F.F. Coppola film would be the defing version of this story. It's not. It is however, far more erotic than most and has all those big budget effects which never fail to impress. 192 Rated R 130 minutes

Drawing Blood Director Sergio Lapel made this trashy vampire in which an artist bites her models and mixes their blood in her pigments. Her protegé Edmund acts as her procurer until his conscience gets the better of him. Enlisting his Jimmy Durante imitating father to help him they set out to bring her down. This is a Troma produced film with all the kitsch and pointless nudity you might expect. Rated R 1999 90 minutes. 

drylongso Pica wanders around her neighborhood taking Polaroid's of all the boys in the neighborhood. She's realized that young black men are an endangered species and she needs to document them while they're still around. It's an unexaggerated view of day to day life in an African American neighborhood as seen through this young woman's eyes. Rated R 2000 81 minutes

Drugstore Cowboy This Matt Dillon classic is an excellent introduction to the depredations of serious drug addiction. It has the grandfather of substance abuse, William Burroughs, playing the role of a defrocked junkie priest. You can often find this one in the Cult section of your video store.

Dumplings If you are looking for the fountain of youth, look no further than Madam Mei's kitchen. Her dumpling have a secret ingredient that's guarantees a return to your former physical glory. If you wonder why director Fruit Chan enjoys such a cult following, here is one of his films you can really sink your teeth into.  A fading TV star will do most anything to regain her husbands affection and her former beauty. Mei helps her with her tasty dumplings until she meets the husband. This film can be found as a 30 minute version on the Three-extremes compilation or better as the full length "Dumplings" Who was it that said,"Vanity makes fools of us all"? Perhaps they meant cannibals, too. Rated III for obvious reasons.Written by Lillian Lee and starring Miriam Yeung, Bai Ling and Tony Ka-Fai Leung 90 minutes Cantonese w/subtitles

E

Earth Girls Are Easy This was made when Geena Davis and Jeff Goldblum couldn't get enough of each other. Look for an early appearance of Jim Carey and Damon Wayans. Lotsa shtick. If you think this was bad, the same crew made Transylvania 6-5000 which is way worse. 1989 100 minutes PG

Eat, Drink, Man, Woman This otherwise dysfunctional Chinese family manage to convey their love and tenderness through their preparation of meals. It may sound corny, but it works. Directed by Ang Lee, you might also check his The Wedding Feast which has a fair amount of food as well as a better story line. 1994 2 hours

Eating Raoul Maybe this was funny, but I saw it so long ago that I forget. A suburban couple develop a taste for human flesh and proceed to place classified ads in sex tabloids to lure in their evening meal. 1982 Rated R 80 minutes

Eat The Rich This may be a British interpretation of a John Water's movie. It is a none too brilliant 1980's send up of the upper classes. An androgynous waiter (Lanah Pellay) rebels and forms a half assed social movement to overthrow the aristocracy. After accruing a few followers they return to a posh restaurant , kill the diners with long bows and proceed to cook them up for the next sitting. Their are lots of inside jokes and social commentary that are both dated and incomprehensible to most non-Brits. Paul McCartney, Bill Wyman and Koo Stark have cameos. Music by Motorhead 1987 , Rated R 92 minutes

The Eden Myth Written and direct by Mark Edlitz this is a tale about family secrets. The Speck sons and daughter are all called home to the family manse for an important meeting with dad. It seems dad has arranged a marriage for his youngest son . Oddly his son has little problem with that and takes an immediate liking to the young woman. Meanwhile the sister is having an affair with the middle brother and the eldest son announces that he to is getting engaged.  The directors intro and the film jacket make a big deal about not revealing the "secret' ending. So, we won't , but we'll wager you'll figure it out long before the big revelation. Rated R 85 minutes

Elling This excellent film was suggested by John Wells, who wrote the following:  Its a Norwegian film by Peter Naess. Starring Per Christian Ellefsen and Sven Nordin as Elling and Kjell Bjarne, the primary characters in the best selling novel by Ingvar Ambjornsen. Elling is a 40ish man who along with Kjell Bjarne lives in a mental institution. The police take Elling from his home after his mother dies, appears Elling lives quite a sheltered life. He tells tales of sexual escapades to the oafish Kjell Bjarne, who has never been with a woman and is obsessed with sex. After 2 years in the institution, the two have developed a friendship and the state decides they are ready to live on there own in an apartment. they are shipped out to the city where they are met by their case worker Frank. Elling would just as soon never leave the house but Frank insists they develop a normal life. Anyway, a good film indeed, attested by the fact that I sat through the whole film in Norwegian (with English subtitles, I'm not a masochist) and was compelled and entertained from start to finish. Thanks John. 89 minutes Rated R 2001

El Topo This Jodorowsky classic is impossible to find on video but it is unquestionably a classic of weird cinema. It must be 2 1/2 hours long and is essentially a non stop hallucination captured on film. It's great, please, somebody, send us a copy, we're having withdrawals.

Elvis Meets Nixon What were they thinking when they made this movie? It is a rather tongue in cheek retelling of the bizarre piece of American pop history. It seems Elvis got pissed off one night and took off from Graceland unescorted by his "Boys". He flew up to DC  and got Nixon to make him a drug enforcement agent. For Real! Dick Cavet tells the story with some help from Wayne Newton and David Crosby. Really amazing.

The End of The Road Stacey Keach plays the dope Jack Horner who is lost in America's university system. Taken from the novel by John Barth, you may still be able to dig this one up. James Earl Jones has a small part and there's a great scene with a chicken. Directed by Aram Avakian 1970 110 minutes Rated X

Entropy n physics, entropy is the he tendency for thing to reach there lowest energy state. Director Phillip Loanou's film about a young director in love has little to do with this concept. Actor Stephen Dorff gets his big shot at breaking into working for a major film studio when his amorous obsession with Judith Godreche. Most critics liked this one, but we're not sure if you will. 110 Minute Rated R

Eraserhead This may be the only movie other than The English Patient that I walked out of. Not technically a classic, it is in black and white and may well have inspired the sets for Pee Wee's Playhouse. David Lynch made this, but he got better. 1978 90 minutes Unrated

Even Dwarves Started Small Why was Herzog booed off the stage when they showed this at the NY Film festival? Sit through it and you'll have the answer to that question. Filmed entirely with a cast of Dwarves and Midgets, this may be the tale of a patient take over at a mental hospital. Ostensibly, the film is in German, but cackling dwarves need no subtitles. This film has the look and feel of the Little Rascals on LSD. Like all Herzog films, it is apparent that everyone had a good time and the movie was just a by product. It took awhile to find this one and thanks to everyone who helped track it down. This is a must for Herzog fans. 11/98

Eva Jean Moreau plays Eve, an unbelievably cruel courtesan in this 1960's Joseph Losey film. Stanley Baker is a Welsh writer who has settled in Venice . He loses his gorgeous fiancé , Virna Lisi, when she is faced with his sordid affair with Eve. In spite of his undying love and countless sacrifices, Eve treats him like dirt. This French classic will make you yearn for the days when you could smoke in public. Recently reassembled from its many cuts, this lost treasure has just been re-released on DVD. 1962 119 minute French w/subtitles unrated

Eu,Tu,El Darlene (Regina Case) is pregnant and she leaves her small Brazilian town to have her child elsewhere. She returns 3 years later with her toddler to find her mother has just died. With limited resources, Darlene arranges a marriage with a local man, Osias, 20 years her senior in exchange for a house. They have a son, but Osias is a lazy bum  and when his cousin Zezinho, comes to stay, Darlene has another son with him. Next Ciro comes along, a homeless handsome drifter and Darlene adds a fourth son to her brood with his assistance. All three men love her and they decide to share her affections rather than risk losing her. Osias adopts all the boys so they are legitimate and they live happily ever after. The scenery is bleak, life is poor but it is an incredible and unorthodox love story. PG13 107 minutes 2000 Brazilian Portugese w/English Subtitles

 Eversmile, New Jersey Daniel Day Lewis goes riding around Patagonia with a foldout dental chair on his motorcycle to promote dental hygiene in Argentina. He is sponsored by a New Jersey charity that abandons him, but fortunately his love interests fill the gap. 1990 Rated PG 88 minutes

Every Man For Himself And God Against All One of Werner Herzog's more elusive tales based on the true story of a kid with no social skills who wanders into 18th century Nuremberg. Unable to speak and barely able to walk, he is adopted and raised by the townspeople. Kaspar is played by Bruno S. the certified schizophrenic who steals the show in Herzog's other loser movie Stroszek. 1975 110 minutes also titled The Mystery of Kaspar Hauser

Eye of God Ainsley is a rather naive counterperson in a small oil town burger joint. She meets and marries an ex con that she had corresponded with while he was upstate. He has found God while he was away, but that doesn't stop him. Not very good, even if the jacket is telling the truth about Siskel & Ebert's thumbs. 1997  88 min Rated R  12/99

F

F***/Off No we didn't put the asterisks in, that's the actual title of this comic tale of two lame bank robbers. Ah Lee is a bank teller who is in deep to his threatening stock broker. He runs into Papa who is an incredibly stupid crook wannabe looking for henchmen. They team up for an abortive attempt at a life of crime. This might be considered a Cantonese version of Wes Anderson's "Bottle Rocket". Entertaining. Chinese and English subtitles 90 min Rated IIb

Face Ray (Robert Carlyle) is a 'Face" or an honourable man in British criminal parlance. He and his mates rob things, like an armored car service, to have a little spending money. Like all entertaining crime stories, something goes wrong. First the screw up the heist by taking all the small bills and leaving millions behind. With only 60,000 pounds each, there five member gang starts to turn on themselves. By morning, only 4 left and all 5 bags of money are missing. The money's gone somewhere and three more people turn up dead, so who's ripped them off. They band together and scour the city in search of clues and their cash, but it's far from simple. Much grittier than a Guy Ritchie film and rest assured there are no pretty boys in this cast. Better than most and directed by Antonia Bird who also gave us Ravenous. 107 minutes Rates R British w/o subtitles.

Face A forensic anthropologist is being haunted by one of his facial reconstructions. As added stress he is a single parent raising a young daughter who has had a heart transplant. The girl is having recurring rejection problems due to something called a beta allergy. Well, it turns out the specialist who did the surgery had a murderous assistant who acquired hearts especially for beta allergic patients. It seems the little girl and her father are being haunted by the original owner of her heart. When dad finally solves the case the doctor is arrested and the ghost who was assisting him is laid to rest. Sort of a hybrid Asian ghost story with a little extra gore thrown in. Better than most; the photography is decent, it is not overly hokey and actually gets a little scary at times. Directed by YOO san-gon  Korean w/subtitles 2004 unrated

Fait Accompli Ling is a fertility doctor who runs a sperm bank in need of donors. Her mother in law is a meddlesome type who is desperate for a grandchild. So desperate, in fact, that she perforates the couples condom supply. There are a few funny scenes, but it degrades into a sappy melodrama after the husband dies. Cantonese w/subtitles 90 min rated III

Far From Home Sang Woo is a spoiled little city kid who is unimpressed with his mute grandmother and her rustic ways. His mother has left him with grandma for the summer and he has a lot of adjusting to do before he sees the values in country living. He is shocked that you can’t get batteries for your gameboy out there and it is intriguing to see how this odd couple adapts. It is a really well made story about a cross in generations that  truly comes across cultures. Chinese 2000 90 min Rated I

Fashionably L.A. A no holds look at working your way up or through the modeling business in LA. Directed by Tamara Olson who apparently lived through this hell before becoming a great director. Show this to your teenage daughters to dispel any illusions she may have about the glamour of a modeling career. 95 min unrated  VHS*

The Favor, The Watch and the Very Big Fish Bob Hoskins, Natasha Richardson, Michel Blanc and Jeff Goldblum compose the unlikely cast in this adaptation of the Marcel Ayme short story "Rue St. Sulpice" . Hoskins is a photographer who makes kitchy religious photos. He hires Goldblum to play Jesus and Jeff starts taking the part a bit too seriously. Richardson is their quirky love interest who has an interesting story to tell. This sleeper might have been a Handmade film, but was made after their demise. Don't give up on it, at least until you see Goldblum/Jesus walk on water. Directed by Ben Lewin  Rated R 1992 90 minutes. 

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas A total waste of your time, Johnny Depp's talent and some poor slobs money. Hunter Thompson is fun to read but his delirium does not translate onto film even with the help of Terry Gilliam. If you actually sat through this, check out "Where the Buffalo Roam" another senseless attempt to put Dr. Gonzo on celluloid but this time with Bill Murray as Dr T. 1997 98 long minutes rated R

Felicia's Journey If Happiness left you feeling uneasy, this Atom Egoyan film may affect your sleeping pattern. Ostensibly a film about a super nice, seemingly normal guy, Joseph Hilditch (Bob Hoskins) who is a serial murder of young homeless girls and prostitutes. He casually stalks them and befriends them in a slow spider like fashion. Ultimately, when he gains his victim's their confidence, they unburden their problems. After that, he helps them out by drugging and killing them. It all has to do with a slowly evolving fixation he had with his dominant television star mom. The tale is ordinary enough, but it is the ordinariness of Joseph's life that makes this such a fearful tale. Hoskin's is at his best, as this character who is truly the dark side of Humbert Humbert .  Elaine Cassidy is very convincing as Felicia. This film left me feeling smarmy and nervous. Somehow it is rated PG-13 go figure. 116 minutes 1999

Ferpect Crime The director of this Spanish comedy Alex de la Iglesia agrees that this is a stupid title for his rather silly film about a foppish department store salesman who unwittingly murders his boss. Rafael had it all, a stable of beatiful mistresses, good looks, stylish clothes and a shot at his dream job. Unfortunately it all goes awry when a rather awkward salesclerk helps him cover up his crime. She proceeds to black mail him into an awkward sexual liaison and then an unwanted marriage. His dream life becomes hell on earth. Well timed jokes and funny camera work make this farcical tale into a great laugh. Iglesia is able to project his wonderful Spanish sense of humor into his film with style and grace. Look for it. 105 minutes Spanish w/subtitles.

Fight Club Ouch! The basic rule, if Brad Pitt is in it, go see it, applies. Pitt and Edward Norton meet as seat mates on a cross country flight. Soon after that, Ed's apartment blows up destroying all his great Ikea furniture. He calls Pitt's character, Tyler Durdin, looking for some consolation and they end up beating the snot out of each other in a parking lot. Both of them kind of enjoy the drubbing, and soon others join in the fun and "fight club" evolves. Their basic rule is never tell anyone about fight club, making this bashed up crew into an exclusive group. Pitt's character, Tyler develops a "fight club' philosophy as their ranks swell and before long their macho sadistic pastime  gets out of hand. These bad boys quickly become terrorists working for the good of mankind. This is a great depiction of a personality cults that has gone wild, adapted form the novel by Chuck . Helena Bonham Carter is the serious love interest and an unusual soul. Great film. 1999 Rated R, 139 minutes

The Fifth Element By the time you read this, this movie should be out on video. Bruce Willis is beginning to dominate this genre, but he can't outdo his Yugoslavian co star in this bizarre story. Futuristic Dick Tracy type sets are excellent and don't detract from the well written sci-fi story. Nice taxicab scenes.

Finding Graceland Poor Byron (Jonathan Schaech) is driving around in a sadly scraped 67 Cadillac with a missing door. He picks up Harvey Keitel who turns out to be the reincarnated Elvis.  Bridget Fonda looks great as Marilyn Monroe.  Their trip through Graceland is the highlight . PG13 97 minutes 1998 .

Fishing With Gandhi If your head is clogged from too many slick formulaic Hollywood films, watch this movie, it is brain Drano. Gil and Roy are a none too bright set of hillbilly twins ( played by James & Rick Reichmuth)  that pick up Danno (Dan Klein) a pathetic stoner who is hitch hiking home from his mothers wedding. She married his Uncle Roy (which puts this solidly in our avuncular film category). Anyway these two "human speed bumps" make frequent stops to let their overheated pick up truck cool down. The dialogs that ensue are inane and priceless. Both a comedy and a safety film as director Gabe Weisert clearly spells out the dangers of human inbreeding. 73 minutes unrated 1999

Five Corners This movie has John Turturro, Tim Robbins, Jody Foster and a penguin . Back from prison, Turturro tries to reassimilate into his Bronx neighborhood. Its a great chance to see a lot of good actors early in their careers. There is a real nice scene when JT throws his mother out the window to keep from breaking her heart. It also raises the question are there still Indians in the Bronx. Directed by Tony Bill and, yes, 5 corners actually exists. 1988 Rated R 92 minutes 1/99

Flirt  This unusual film is the same tale told three times. Even the dialog is consistant, but the locations and genders change around, just to keep it interesting. Hal Hartley produced this directors trick of a film for his own amusement and perhaps you'll join in the fun of seeing just how much directorial control can alter the same script. 1995 Rated R 85 minutes

Floundering Ostensibly, a post riots LA flagellation movie, we follow John (John LeGros) around Venice beach while he figures out life is a complicated process that his ill equipped to handle. The cast is extensive and, yes, Steve Buscemi is among the walk on notables as are Billy Bob Thornton and Kim Wayans. One great politically incorrect line: "Where there's no hope, theres dope !" Hard to tell who's the bigger loser, John or this movie. 1994 Rated R 97 Minutes

Freaks If you are reading this, there's a 90% chance you've seen this granddaddy of le cinema bizarre. This Tod Browning extravaganza is in a class by itself. Filmed with a troupe of circus freaks it was a little too strong for modern sensibilities and lay buried for a few decades. Briefly, it is the tale of a high flying hussy trapeze artist who seduces little hans away from his diminuitive fiance. She marries him for his money and drugs him into submission. The freaks come to Han's rescue and chickenize the trapeze artist. Zip and Pip are in this. Good stuff. 1932 one hour Unrated

Freaks and Men Filmed in sepia, this Russian story of early photography revolves around the advent of pornography and a kidnapped pair of singing Siamese twins. Very cool and amazingly good cinematography. Sort of a Russian David Lynch film. 90 min 2003 Unrated Russian w/subtitles

Freeway Dad's a crack head, moms a hooker and poor Vanessa never had a stable home life. When mom gets busted, she does a Little Red Ridinghood and heads off for grandma's house. She hitches a ride with Keiffer Sutherland who is the notorious I-5 killer. She shoots him, gets busted and her troubles begin. Directed by Matthew Bright, Amanda Plummer is the mom and  Reese Witherspoon, Dan Hedaya and Brooke Shields are also on the roster. Weird stuff. There's also a sequel, but not as good. 1996 Rated R 102 minutes

Freeze Die Come To Life This Russian coming of age movie shares very little with it's American counterparts. Filmed in eastern Siberia, a young boy leads a harsh existence among the thieving brutal alcoholic adults that cheer up his day. Filmed at the tail end of the communist era, it shows Russian life as it may still be today. Filmed in black & white it helps emphasize the gloominess of the countryside. Amidst the kicks and punches, our young hero manages to keep you amused. 105 minute B&W 1989 Unrated.

Frequency Dennis Quaid stars as a New York fireman living in Queens back in 1969, the year the Mets won the series. The film flashes forward 30 years and we follow Quaids son who is now a NY policeman assigned to a serial murder case that spans the 30 year interlude. Due to unusual solar activity the father and son contact one another over a ham radio and over the three decades. They combine their efforts to catch the killer and completely screw up the future by messing with the past. Really schmaltzy stuff but the science fiction parts are excellent and worth slogging past the heavy emotional sequences. By the way, real New Yorkers can tell when you film in Toronto so don't try and tell us it's really Queens, okay. 

Frogs for Snakes Actors often say they would kill for a part, but these guys actually do. You need a scorecard to keep track of this character filled send up of the New York actor/gangster scene. If you enjoy the joke, you'll find this one entertaining. Directed by Amos Poe with Barbara Hershey, Robbie Coltrane. Lisa Marie and Clarence Williams the third to name a few. 1999 Rated R 92 minutes.

The Funeral Some films let you know up front, that they just aren't going to have a happy ending. Since this aptly titled film opens with the funeral of Johnny (Vincent Gallo) , you get an early clue. Three mobster brothers; Ray (Christopher Walken), Chez (Chris Penn) and the late Johnny, handle the unions in New York in the thirties. They are a little short on friends but they have each other. Isabella Roselinni plays Chez's wife and Annabella Sciorra is married to Ray. Directed by Abel Ferrara who gave us Bad Lieutenant. Vincent Gallo is terrific as the corpse, you never see him breathe, no matter how close you look. 1997 Rated R 99 minutes

G

The General Director John Boorman assembled a great cast for this true story of the Irish criminal nicknamed "The General'. Based on the book by Paul Williams, the movie begins at the end. There is little doubt going in, that the main character will be dying in about 2 hours. With that out of the way, we watch young Martin (Played by Eammon Owens of butcher Boy fame) rise through the junior criminal class in the Hollyfield slums. Pilfering his way into manhood Martin takes up burglary, armed robbery and eventually assembles a sizable army of henchpersons. With no allegiance to either the IRA or the Ulster Loyalists, Martin deftly plies his trade while harassing the Garda at every turn.  It's all very amusing and of course he does get killed in the end, because even in real life crime does not ....   Take note of Martin's superb collection of pig t-shirts. Brendan Gleeson is Martin. John Voigt is his nemesis Inspector Kenny and Maria Doyle Kelly and Angelene Bell are his common law wives. Van Morrison performs most of the music.   Irish 1998 Rated R 124

Ghost Dog Forest Whitaker transformed himself into an urban American Samurai who works for a withering arm of the New Jersey mob. He lives high above his Jersey City (?) neighborhood up on the roof with his pigeons and a copy of Hagakure, the book of the Samurai. His best friend is Isaach de Bankole who is a French speaking ice cream vendor whom he doesn't understand, literally. Jim Jarmusch wrote and directed "Ghost Dog" which is arguably his best film to date. This is a tale about the extinction of the warrior class in modern America. There are lots of subtle touches that will allow you to watch this film a few times before you get them all. I particularly liked  the license plates. Rated R, 112 minutes 1999

Ghost World If this art film passed your neighborhood by, wait a few weeks and it will be available at your local warehouse store. Enid (Thora Birch) is a loser who has no big plans after High School. For some summer entertainment, She and her girlfriend Rebecca (Scarlett Johansan) decide to contact someone pathetic from the personal ads. Lo and behold they stumble upon Steve Buscemi, a even bigger loser than either of them . They follow him home and make a hobby of stalking him . Before long Enid takes a liking to him, when she realizes you can actually be an outcast right through middle age. He fills her in on geek success strategies and helps her past the last vestiges of her adolescence. It is directed by Terry Zwigoff, who gave us "Crumb" and in keeping with his cartoon theme this film is based loosely on the Daniel Clowe's comic book with the same title. A lot of you gave this film an "Eh, it was okay" review but we collectively feel it is a brilliant piece of work. So if you have not done so, go see it. Look for clips and music from the Hindi classic " Gumnaam" in the opening scene. 

Go A tightly woven story in four parts that all center around a drug deal that goes wrong. The clock keeps resetting as we pick up each character at a Los Angeles supermarket and follow them through an unusual 24 hours. Ronna (Sarah Poley )is a checkout girl who likes to walk on the wild side. Simon (Desmond Askew) is an English émigré drawn to Vegas' allure. Adam (Scott Wolfe) and Zack (Jay Mohr) are TV detective and enamored with themselves and one another. Claire (Katie Holmes) is Ronna's friend who gets left as collateral in a drug deal. Very similar set up to Midaq Alley. Lots of talent, lots of action and quite entertaining. Directed by Doug Liman and brought to our attention by Charlie Sinel 1999 Rated R 110 minutes

The God of Cookery Stephen Chiau wrote directs and stars as the God of Cookery, who may be the meanest food critic of all times. He meets his downfall when he is challenged by an understudy chef and it is apparent he cannot cook. He then loses his 20 restaurants for serving British beef in this Hong Kong gastronomic comedy. He gets picked up from the gutter by Sister Turkey ( Karen Mok) who runs a noodle stand in the Temple Street market and has a crush on him. They invent a dish called" Explosive Pissing Beef Balls" which rockets them to success. In a series of scenes that skewer Kung Fu films Stephen tries to regain his crown in a master cooking contest. It's all very tongue in cheek and quite clever. Cantonese with English subtitles. VCD & DVD

Going To School With My Father On My Back If you think the title is long, wait till you see the film. This is the tale of a precocious village boy, Shiwa, whose brains and good luck afford him a decent education. He excels in chemistry at the local High School and wins a regional prize to the delight of his father and members of their village. The father, a widower, has a stroke and requires constant attention. Since his daughter has recently married, the fathers care falls on Shiwa. He tries to balance his familial duties with his desire to go to college, but it all seems hopeless. It is a touching story hat gives some insight into the strength of familial obligation that still exists within rural Chinese culture. This film manages to convey a strong emotional story without resorting to saccharine and swelling music. Chinese w/subtitles 90 long minutes Unrated 

Gothic A gothic horror film by Ken Russel. run away. 1986  87 minutes

Grave Indiscretion Sting appears in this modern human entree loser. Technically this is not a cannibal movie, they feed the corpse to the pig then have a ham dinner. It's pretty poor. 

Green Ralph gets some acid from a friendly chemist and trips with his three slacker friends. This four part movie examines the psychedelic analysis that these four undergo over the course of the evening.  Ralph ( Director Karl Hirsch's autobiographical character)  realizes his film career does not exist and perhaps he has a small problem with intimacy. Eric's trip is presented in a cool stop motion animation sequence. Best line is: "This is my life, and boy does it suck." Dave, the no where poet, does a stand up routine and Joanne just loses it. They end up in the emergency room and generally realize their lives suck. Ralph leaves town in the end. 2000 Unrated B&W/Color 91 minutes A First Rites Film.

Greenfish Mak Dong has just been released from the army and is on his way home, when he helps out a woman on the train. A couple of guys are hassling her, and he steps in  gets his ass kicked and gets booted off the train. She calls him, because she collected his luggage and they agree to meet. It turns out she is a mobster's girlfriend and she gets him a job with the gang. Meanwhile his real family consists of 3 brothers, one is a wife beating detective, the second is severely handicapped and happy while the third sells eggs. He is still getting his ass kicked on a regular basis but the mob boss Bae Tse-Yong, takes him into the family and allows his to call him "Big  Brother". Apparently this is a big thing among Korean mobsters. Now he's got two families and can't seem to handle either of them but one of them is going to be the death of him. Written & directed by Lee Chang-dong 1997 Korean w/subtitles Rated OAT II 

Grey Gardens A voyeuristic peek into the lives of  two genuine American eccentrics; Edith Bouvier Beale and her 50 year old daughter Edie. The pair inhabit a decrepit mansion called Grey Gardens in the wealthy enclave of New York's Hamptons. . They seldom go outdoors, they inhabit one or two rooms of Grey Gardens, cooking on a hotplate and singing off key show tunes.  The house is shared with a herd of cats, an attic full of racoons  and their attendant fleas. Filmed by the Maysles brothers (David & Albert) who somehow gained the trust of these unusual members of Jackie Kennedy's family. She must have been pissed when this was released. 1000 thanks to Lorette Masa who raved about this film and found us a copy. Edie died in 2002 - we'll miss you Edie.  1976 Unrated 90 minutes See February 2001 Movie of the month

Gummo A white trash holiday, this is one strange ass film about life in a lower class Xenia, Ohio. By carefully weaving real interviews and fictional scenes, the director Harmony Korishe, leaves you wondering if there is a line between the two. The opening scene is a little kid in rabbit ears and shorts, pissing off an overpass onto cars on the interstate. Then it goes into a series of slightly disconnected vignettes. The lead, Gummo, picks up cash by shooting cats with BB guns, so he can sell the meat to the local Chinese restaurant. Brilliant. 1997 Rated R Thanks to Ola Lundin

Gumnaam  Were you wondering where that bizarre dance sequence was from in the beginning of "Ghost World" ?  It came from this Hindi Classic and the song was "Jaan Pehechaan Ho" by Mohammed Rafi a well known singer who dubbed for hundreds of musicals. The movie is a lengthy suspense thriller where six people win an all expenses paid vacation in a nightclub contest. The trip turns out to be an evil scheme and they end up stranded on a desert island. The group discovers a house on the island and a comic caretaker who has been awaiting their arrival. While seated around the dinner table, it becomes apparent, each guest has something to hide.  They begin to die one at a time in a script similar to "10 Little Indians" .  If you are unfamiliar with Bollywood films, this is a good place to start. You can probably find a copy at a  local Indian grocery, if you are lucky enough to live near one. Stars include Manoj Kumar, Mehmood, Helen, Pran, Madan Puri and Nanda, Directed by Raja Nawathe and produced by N.N.Sippy.  1966 Unrated  B&W Hindi with subtitles, and really long. 

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Habit We should do a subheading of vampire films shot on the lower east side of Manhattan. Is it just a coincidence that NYU film school is in that neighborhood. This blood feast is written, directed and edited by Larry Fessenden, who also plays the lead . A talented guy. Sam is a lost soul whose girlfriend has just moved out. He meets his Vampiress, Anna (Meredith Snander) at a Halloween party. It is a little ambiguous whether Anna is into serious unsafe sex or just your average Transylvanian/New York transplant. Unless your a fan of this genre, wait for Larry's next movie, it's gonna be a lot better. 112 minutes Rated R 1997 5/99

Half Japanese For the first half of this rockumentary , we figured it was a spoof. Especially since they have Penn Gillette vouch for the artistic talents of this garage band entitled Half Japanese. By the second half,  it became apparent that there really is a band called Half Japanese and we just have been out of the loop for the past 15 years. Apparently, Jad Fair and his brother, David, decided they could make music in their bedroom and get themselves heard. The fact that they were incapable of playing musical instruments was no deterrent to these guys and they gathered a sizable cult of fans over the years. Jad has continued the band ( David became an accountant or something) and he even learned to play the guitar after a while.  Lack of financial and popular success have never mattered and tenacity matched with sheer artistry drowned out their lack of musical skills. You can find some of their stuff floating around on MP3 sites and it might be worth your while to check them out. You can skip this movie, however, unless of course you already are a "Half Japanese" fan. 90 min  DVD

Happiness Through an error in judgement, my local video store bought 20 copies of this latest Tod Solondz film. There are not twenty people in my neighborhood that will sit through this 139 minute portrayal of losers. It's a pretty good follow up to Welcome to The Doll House, as Tod continues to pound home his vision of Americans as mundane but seriosly flawed people. Lot's of folks were or will be uneasy with the frank portrayal of a child molester who is otherwise a great guy. Aside from that, Ben Gazarra is terrific as the disenchanted Miami father and Lara Flyn Boyle is wonderful as his sucessful but disfunctional daughter. Look for Marla Maples as Ann Chambers, in her screen debut (?) . Your mother will not like this film, but if you are a sick twisted soul, you'll have no trouble finding a copy.As a bonus it was shot in Livingston, Fort Lee and North Bergen, New Jersey, some truly happening places. Unrated 139 minutes 1998 5/99

Hard Eight Written and directed by Paul Thomas Anderson, this must have been a low budget affair as it is spartan in both characters and settings. Filmed in casinos, parking lots and hotel rooms it is the story of an old gambler that takes a young loser under his wing. He teaches him to get a room, get a meal and to get laid. Why? Anyway, Samuel Jackson plays his usual low rent thug who screws up the plans and livens up the tale. Kind of like an Elmore Leonard story. 1997 100 min

Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle This is the exception for your standard New Jersey drugged out idiotic road film. Sure, it is all those things but the whole thing is also a none to subtle parody of the whole genre. The two heroes are Chinese and Indian immigrants who have a healthy take on their immigrant status. They are still official garden state stoners and most of the film centers around getting high and having the munchies. I n this case they are on a quest for a few dozen White Castle grease burgers to assuage their hunger. They get lost along the way and the film follows them through a series of misadventures. Better than most and filled with lots of inside jersey jokes. From the team who gave us "Dude, who stole my car" 2004 90 minutes Rated PG13

Harvey If you are one of the few people who have missed this Jimmy Stewart/Pookah movie please find a copy and watch it. It make a strong case for excessive drinking. .

The Hairdresser's Husband A middle aged bachelor fulfills his live long destiny by marrying the hairdresser of his dreams. This mildly erotic French love story, directed by Patrice Leconte, will tweak every Romantic bone in your body. Jean Rochefort stars with Anna Galiena. These two are just crazy about each other. Recommended by Ed Hessel and he should know, his wife is a hairdresser. Not recommended for Francophobes or brutal realists. 90 minutes rated R French w/ subtitles

Haunted Office A Hong Kong horror film about an office building that has an abundance of dead tenants. In fact every year the building claims 9 lives. It all seems to emanate from the last stall on the 13 th floor ladies room. Samuel Jackson has a bit part as a low rent mobster.  Not particularly horrid or interesting

Heartbreak Hotel What do you get your maudlin divorcee mother for her birthday? Well these kids kidnap Elvis, as the ultimate pick me up surprise for mom (Tuesday Weld). A funny idea that holds up for about 30 minutes of this 90 minute joke. David Keith does a passable Elvis, but, hey, he's not alone. Directed by Chris Columbus 1988 93 minutes

Heavenly Creatures The true story of two teenage girls whose obsessive imaginary world led them to plot and carry out a grisly murder in 1952 New Zealand. Kate Winslet's portrayal is tolerable as a rich socialite, used to getting her own way. Her character is interesting for approximately 5 minutes, when the two school chums indulge in fantasy and lesbianism in the same evening. Based on the journals by one of the girls and interviews with former classmates. Recommended and reviewed by Kim Danbert.Directed by Peter Jackson 1994 100 minutes Rated R

Hedwig and the Angry Inch Hedwig is the transexual East German singer for the band, The Angry Inch. They are playing bowling alleys while Hedwig's old flame Tommy is packing arenas with Hedwig's songs. We get Hedwig's sordid tale in flashbacks all about his cut rate trans-gender operation that left an inch behind and his marriage to an American GI. It's a musical directed by Mirian Shor based on the Broadway play. 2000 rated PG 13 90 minutes

Henry - Portrait of A Serial Killer I cannot really tell you to watch this film, you would lose all respect for me. It is exactly what the title says, a very graphic depiction of what a serial killer does with his/her spare time. It could have been a little more gory, but why press the point. Not for people with serious medical conditions or a strong moral repulsion to murder. Ola Lundin recommended this one, but the Swedish version was pared down to 20 minutes by the censors. He also suggested Clean Shaven which may be just as sick. Henry-Portrait of a Serial Killer II has just been released.

Henry Fool Mr. Fool (Thomas Jay Ryan) , is a literary didact who has just been released on pedophilia charges. He rents a basement apartment in the Queen's home of the Grim family. Mrs. Grim is a stay at home manic who is lorded over by her sexually active daughter (Parker Posey) and her garbage man son, Simon (James Urbaniek). Henry gives Simon a marble notebook and tells him to write down his thoughts. Meanwhile, Henry is down the basement churning out his Magnum Opus entitled Confessions of Henry Fool. In time, Simon's lunatic scribbling gain popularity while Henry's genius goes unheralded. Their lives slowly change place with all the convolutions and weird imagery you'd expect from director Hal Hartley. If you are not a fan yet, this movie may do the trick. 1998 Rated R 3 hours Thanks to Tuco and everyone who recommended this masterpiece.

Hero From the director of Flying Daggers, Zhang Yimou , this is a fantastic visual feast masquerading as a story of betrayal and imperial intrigue. Three sword fighting conspirators attempt to revenge the Qin invasion of Zhao.Their complex plan for regicide becomes their undoing as the triad loses its unanimity. Gorgeous, interesting and memorable. Rated IIb Mandarin 2004

High Art I think the term "critically acclaimed" has often been applied to this superb film. Syd is an aggressive up and coming sub editor at a slick art photo magazine. She accidentally discovers her upstairs neighbor is a one time famous photographer Elsie Berliner,  who has slid into a heroine haze. Syd gets her a new shot at reviving Elsie's career but gets dragged down as she helps Ms. Berliner get back up. Subtle and very sexy. Rated R 90 minutes 1999

High Fidelity John Cusack is Rob Gordon an owner of an elitist record store that still sells vinyl. His current girlfriend is just about to leave him as the film begins. He monologues his way through all his past relationships and  decides to look up the women from his most traumatic break ups. His biggest problem is that he relies on rock lyrics for advice on his love life. Jack Black is excellent as his know it all employee who mercilessly torments his fellow employee Dick (Todd Louiso) . Kind of like "Bridget Jone's Diary"  from a male perspective. Very, very good. Directed by Stephen Frears and adapted from the novel by Nick Hornby. Read the book, too. 114 minutes Rated R 2000

The Hitman's Journal  Yeah, another bad mob movie, with Danny Aiello, no less

House of Flying Daggers Director Zhang Yimou has created another beautifully filmed martial arts love story that takes place in the 8th century in China. The Flying Daggers are a radical group of martial arts experts that specialize in throwing knives and overthrowing the corrupt regime. They run a well organized guerilla campaign that seems destined to succeed. A police detective infiltrates the group through a blind dancer only to find himself in love with his quarry. The resulting love triangle ends in a fantastic battle between her two lovers with awesome cinematography and amazing graceful fight scenes. Cantonese w/subtitles 2003 129 minutes Unrated

House of Yes Parker Posey and Josh Hamilton play scandalous twins who have an ongoing incestual affair. What makes it kinky is her Jacky O pill box hat and outfit. Tory Spelling give the performance of her career as the girlfriend who comes home for the weekend. Adapted from the Wendy Macleod play, I'm glad I didn't pay 75 bucks to see this one on Broadway. Freddy Prinze Jr plays the little brother in this charming family. Recommended by Lisa J. Schultz. 89 minutes Rated R

How to Get Ahead in Advertising Richard Grant is an advertising mogul who has some doubts about his profession. A boil on his shoulder begins to give him advice, then begins to bully him. Written and directed by Bruce Robinson, this could be a sequel to Withnail & I. Kinda weird. 1989 British Rated R 95 minutes

Human Pork Chop This is a horrendous Hong Kong movie about a gang of thugs who hold a prostitute hostage until she can repay a debt. Everyone is addicted to heroine and they revel in abusing this poor woman until she dies. Then they eat her, get caught by the police, confess and ask for forgiveness. Cantonese/Mandarin with subtitles 

The Hunger A treat for David Bowie fans, he's great in yet another movie that flopped at the box-office. Catherine DeNeuve plays opposite Bowie as his loyal Vampire companion. Susan Sarandon gets naked, which some people might enjoy and all in all it fits into the Vampiroerotica category. Directed by Tony Scott and recommended by Madeline K. 1983 97 minutes Rated R

Hurricane Streets Ain't seen it yet

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I ♥ (Love) Hukabees  Jason Schwartzman plays a young activist who runs a save-the-open-spaces organization. When his group is co opted by a department store publicist played by Jude Law he is lost.  His lack of focus leads him to an existential detective agency run by Lili Tomlin and Dustin Hoffman. They track their client everywhere and pair him up with another client, Mark Wahlberg. Wahlberg introduces him to Chloe Sevigny who is a competing detective that espouses an oppositional philosophy. A confusing and humorous debate ensues. Naomi Watts is very funny as  Jude's girlfriend. Recommended to all "Rushmore" fans. David O. Russel directed this 106 minute film. Great stuff. 

The Ice Storm A dated tale of sexual awakening in the suburbs. A young Christina Ricci is daughter to Kevin Klein and they all live unhappily in New Canaan CT. Everyone tries to get laid but all end up frustrated when the clock strikes twelve. It all seems so silly now, especially the clothes.

Igby Goes Down   Kieraan Caulkin plays the slightly perverse teenager Igby Slocumb, who has decided to get out while he can, from his never been functional family. Dad, Bill Pullman, was never right and has been institutionalized for quite some time. He has been displaced by DH (Jeff Goldblum) as his mom’s (Susan Sarandon) paramour. Mom is dieing of cancer and with the aid of his brother Oliver, they keep trying Kevorkian inspired suicides. So you can see why Igby wants out. In the interim he does some very un-Holden Caufield things with Suki (Claire Danes) and Amanda Peet. You find yourself rooting for the little tyke and when you see what he’s running from you’ll want to give him a boost over the wall. 90 min Written & Directed by Burr Stees 2002  about 90 min Rated R

Illtown Maybe this is a heroin cowboy movie since the shootouts far outnumber the shoot ups. Lili Taylor is Micky who runs a crew of young retail heroin salespersons with her boyfriend Dante ( Michael Rapport). They have a franchise for the discos and clubs in Miami and are doing fairly well until their ex-partner Gabriele is released from prison. He appears and disappears like the angel of the same name and his dialog gets downright biblical at times. Gabriel even gets advice from God who is portrayed ably by Isaac Hayes. This film jumps around like poor old Billy Pilgrim in Slaughterhouse Five, and it requires some effort to keep track of when and where you are. Tony Danza is the unconvincing mob boss who is the wholesaler for this disputative group of drug merchants. It all ends in a big shootout, unless of course that wasn't actually the beginning. Much of the tension gets resolved on the golf course because all professional druglords enjoy the game.Lilli Taylor is not downright mean but she's a beleivable badass. 1998 Rated R 101 minutes 8/99

Infernal Affairs A Hong Kong Cop movie about a young detective who has been undercover since his first day on the force. Implanted in a Triad gang his is well trusted by his boss Sam and his identity is know to only 1 person on the force. Meanwhile the police force also has a mole that reports to Sam in an equally timely fashion. Both moles are asked to discover their alternate selves and a great cat and mouse film ensues. You know somebody is gonna die, but which one? The DVD has alternate ending, but this may turn up in theaters before the DVD is released in North America. There are a few sequels right behind it. 97 minutes Cantonese w/subtitles

Interview This Korean Dogma 7 film is a cleverly woven story wrapped around the making of a documentary. The documentary's director, Eun Ha and his staff, wander around Seoul asking people to tell them their love stories. While interviewing a young hairdresser, Younghee, he is smitten by her and her simple tale. In fact, her real story is far more complex than the false story she has related for the camera. As the director tries to get closer to her, she artfully discourages him in an attempt to protect her lies. It all unwinds in an unlikely fashion, but it is the sequencing of the scenes and your changing perspective when some scenes are replayed that will hold your interest. It is really the editing and not the story or action that make this film so entertaining. Directed by Eun-Sok who plays himself in the film. Korean w/subtitles Rated IIA

The Adventures of Iron Pussy  By day he is a humble cashier in a 7-11 cashier, but in the off hours she is Iron Pussy, the transvestite super hero Lamduan or Iron Pussy. With her faithful scooter driver Pew, IP is keeping Thailand safe from international bad guys and local toughs. Maybe this is a spoof on James Bond films or maybe it is serious, although the former is more probable. Filled with static musical interludes and lame ass fight scenes, this bitch can kick some ass. At the request of the government, Lamduan becomes a maid in a wealthy household where she can keep an eye on the suspicious foreign visitor, Mr. Henry. Tang, the son of the wealthy home owner soon falls for her and they sing a few coquettish duets. Iron Pussy is torn between love and duty when she discovers Tang and Mr. Henry are concocting new ecstasy inducing drugs. Between crime fighting and wardrobe changes Lamduan also treats everyone to some rockin musical performances. I doubt you'll find this too readily, but if you really want to see it, we can be persuaded to part with our copy. Unrated, Thai with English subtitles

I Went Down Git gets out of prison and heads straight for his local pub. While away, his girlfriend has linked up with his best friend, Auto ( David Wilmet). Auto is also in over his head with the local bookies, who are prepared to do him some serious harm. Git intercedes, blinding one thug and breaking up another. The local mob boss is pissed that Git has been damaging his employees. To settle the score, he agrees to do a small collection job. Of course if it were simple, this would be a fairly short movie. He gets teamed up with a veteran heavy, Bunny Kelly ( Brendan Gleeson), who give him a primer in basic criminal behavior. It's a funny story and almost believable. All the actors are Irish, so this must be an Irish movie. 1998 Rated R 118 minutes

Interview With A Vampire You've all seen this adaptation of the Ann Rice novel so we'll skip it. We had to list it, however, so all you Goths would stop recommending it and clogging up our email. The book is better because Tom Cruise is not in it! Kirsten Dunst is gorgeous.  1994 Rated R 123 interminable minutes

Into The West A terrific Irish movie about a down and out ex gypsy king and his two rogue sons. The two boys are given a horse by their grandfather and they insist on keeping him in the bathroom of their third floor apartment. You'll recognize the cast with Gabriel Byrne, Colm Meany and Ellen Barkin. Great kid friendly film. 1993 97 minutes Rated PG

The Isle You probably don't get too many Korean films at you local theater, so you'll have to hunt for this one. The story has a lot to do with fishhooks, both figuratively and literally. A nameless mute woman, runs a fishing colony out on a lonely lake. The cabins are small houses on floating docks spread out over the lake. She supplies the mostly male occupants with bait, food and sex as their needs require. She saves the life of a suicidal fisherman who appears to be on the lam. A rather tempestuous affairs erupts between them with some real torrid and unexpected results. Rather gruesome in parts but an excellent film if you have a strong constitution. Written and Directed by Ki-Duk Kim, and starring Jung Shu and Yoo-Seok-Kim. Rated III, Korean w/subtitles.

Ivan & Abraham There is very little evidence left of eastern European Jewish Culture from the period between the wars. Director Yolande Zauberman rounded up the talent, money and locations to film this tale. Ivan works for Abraham's family in a Jewish Schtetl in Poland. They run away together and link up with a group of Gypsies as the boys learn a few things about life outside the ghetto. This film is in Polish, Yiddish, Russian and Gypsy. 1997 B&W 105 Minutes Subtitled

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Jade some people really liked this, but we didn't.

James and Julie An imperialist's dream, two kids, James and Julie run away from home/school to see the coronation of Queen Elizabeth the second. They beg, borrow, steal and connive their way into London for the big day. Stupid studio shots are interlaced with news footage of the actual event to help lower production cost of his funny old movie. London looked pretty cool 44 years ago with great looking busses and cars. Peter Sellers has a bit part as a goofy schoolmaster and keep an ear out for the atrocious American accents. 1955 filmed in Technicolor NR British 

Jamon, Jamon A Spanish film about sex and ham. Sylvia is the gorgeous daughter of the town prostitute, so her boyfriend's mom is opposed to their engagement. Everybody is handsome and everyone has some form of torrid sex and best of all there is a "hamicide" at the end. 1994 Spanish w/subtitles 95 minutes Unrated recommended by Jim Mele whose knows a few things about ham. 5/99

Je, tu, il, elle- Recommended by Chris, this sounds like it belongs on this page. He says it contains scenes that drag on endlessly and require as much patience as a Robert Wilson play. Anyone know where I can find a copy?

Jesus of Montreal What the hell is this film about? Perhaps it's a muddled tale about making a passion play in Montreal, but, shit, that's a guess. Forget about it.

La Jetée This 1962 short film by Chris Marker provided the story for 12 Monkeys. Using black and white stills with a French voice over montage into this science fiction story. It tells the tale of a time traveler who returns to Orly airport to try and reverse the effects of an earlier catastrophe. 43 Minutes, French w/subtitles, Unrated 1962

Johnny Stecchino Mistaken for a Palermo mobster, Robert Begnini plays an Italian school bus driver in love. The plot may appear a trifle simplistic, but the acting makes this comedy worthwhile. Ultra funny if it catches you on the right day. You can also find this same cast in Jim Jarmusch's Down By Law.

Johnny Suede Did you miss this one too? Brad Pitt is great as a ghetto dwelling retro rocker who just is clueless about life, love, work and other normal activities. He wants to be a fifties type rock star, only he's about 40 years too late. Did I mention Samuel Jackson is also in this. Excellent hairdos throughout. 1991 rated R 95 min.

Johns Did you ever wonder what it's like being a boy hooker out on Santa Monica Boulevard ? No ! Well you can spend the day with Lukas Hass as Donner and his pal John (David Arquette) and they'll tell you all about it. John is a veteran of the trade and he wisely informs us "the only true friend you have in this world is the money in your pocket". Well maybe he should have followed his own advice because in the opening scene someone steals the bankroll he keeps hidden in his shoes. His day gets worse and if you are really interested, you can  rent this movie and tag along. Directed by Scott Silver. Elliot Gould has a bit part as a john. 1996 rated R 96 minutes

Julien Donkey-Boy It is readily apparent that Julien ( Ewen Brenent) has a few serious problems, but he may not be the strangest character in his addled family. His dad ( Werner Herzog) drinks cough syrup from a slipper and tries to get his wrestler brother to wear a dress for ten bucks. His sister ( Chloe Sevigny)  is a very pregnant ballerina who spends her time shopping for used baby clothes. Harmony Korine has surpassed his excellent film "Gummo" with this Dogma certified epic. We follow Julien as he mutters on street corners, takes out his false teeth and raps with his handicapped friends. Aside from using Herzog in his cast, Korine has also taken a few directing cues from this master of absurd cinema. We think this one is fucking brilliant, but would not be surprised if you disagree. Korine's real grandmother plays Herzog's mom and if we are not mistaken, this film was shot in Queens, NY.  1999 Rated R 94 minutes

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Kafka Jeremy Irons plays Franz in this Brazil like biography of the Czech author. The story is similar to Kafka's unfinished novel "The Castle" and is shot in black and white in the streets of Prague. The film makes very little sense but the acting, costumes, background and general weirdness may help pass 100 minute that might otherwise be wasted. Steven Soderbergh directed Irons and costar Theresa Russell in the well filmed Lem Dobbs script. Joel Grey is excellent .  1991 Rated PG13  100 minutes

Kaho Nara...Pyaar Hai Rohit is a wannabe singer/car salesman who falls in love with Sonia when he delivers a red convertible on her birthday. They meet up again on a cruise where Rohit was hired to sing. They get drunk, get stranded in a lifeboat and end up on a desert island. They are rescued and her wealthy father tries to quench their romance but agrees to their marriage if Rohit can make something of himself. Her father has Rohit killed, she gets shipped off to relatives only to meet up with Rohit's double in New Zealand. There are plenty of the expected musical scenes but they are far more electric and sexually charge than their cinematic predecessors. This film is loaded with blatant plugs for a major cola beverage.  Hindi&English w/subtitles It may be 3 or 4 hours long.

Kairo (Circuit) Even with the diversion of sub titles, this film is so visually disturbing, that it will undoubtedly screw itself into your dreams. The story begins as if this were a movie about nothing in particular, just a bunch of people who work together in a contemporary Japanese setting. One guy fails to show up for a few days, so a co-worker Michi, stops by to see how he's doing. Well, he's acting kind of odd, but he works with computers all day so that's excusable. He does however, hang himself, while she waiting in the next room. She carries off a disk from his house, and the next person to see the file also starts losing it. Kind of like the video tape thing in Ring 2, but not quite. Somehow, the spirit world is spilling into the real world via 56k baud modems. Spirits begin appearing on websites and out of the corner of everyone's vision. The result is severe loneliness and depression among those who come in contact with these shadowy spirits. Those who are susceptible, become entranced and eventually commit suicide or just disappear. The director, Kiyoshi Kurasawa, achieves a slow corrosive sort of horror, that left me as captivated by the film as the viewers were by the ghostly websites. Perhaps it's not for everyone, but this will give you a really thorough fright without resorting to blood, guts and shock to pull off the effect. Japanese w/subtitles 2000 90 minutes Rated IIb

Kakashi Kauru is looking for her missing brother, Izumi.. He vanished without a word to his family. After searching his apartment she finds an address in the countryside and sets out to investigate. The small village is in the midst of some type of harvest festival and they do not welcome the nosey stranger. Her prodding only takes her somewhere she does not want to go, kind of like a Japanese Children of the Corn/Wickerman story. Direct to video and a trifle confusing. 2001 rated IIB Japanese w/subtitles

Keys to Tulsa James Spader is the hapless lad who returns to Tulsa and reunites with some unusual old friends. It has everything a good movie requires: drugs, guns, greed, pointless full frontal nudity and Mary Tyler Moore. Cameron Diaz is in this for the first 3 minutes. 137 minutes 1997 Unrated!

Khosla Ka Ghosla  Mr. KK Khasla has one dream, to buy a plot of land and build his dream house to accommodate his whole family. He's picked out the property and when retirement approaches he takes his life savings and plunks it down in cash 35 lahks  with a rather sleazy real estate developer. When he takes the family out to survey the property they find it has been fenced in and inhabited by Khurana a mafioso who demands 12 lahk before he will vacate the land. They try all legal means and a few not so legal maneuvers to regain control but nothing seems to be working. Finally the second son, Cherry, employs a group of actors to outscam the scam artists. In a kind of unorthodox comedy, the troupe does an excellent job of beating the thieves at their own game. Advertised as a black comedy, it is perhaps dark by Indian standards, but is simply funny . Directed by Dibakar Banerjee and written by Jaideep Sahni, this offbeat story has landed a number of awards including the oddfilms.com seal of approval. Hindi 136 minutes unrated 2007 subtitles.

Killer Klowns From Outer Space Alien clowns come to earth in tent shaped UFOs and catch humans for sustenance. This will realign your current perception of the circus. Written, directed and special effect by the none to famous Chioddo Brothers. 1983 Rated PG-13 ?? 88 minutesinutes

The Killer Jeff (Chow Yun Fat) is a hit man, and he's very accomplished even if he is an old softy. During a shooting spree he sets his gun off too close to a hostages face and burns her eyes. He tracks her down a few months later determined to help her. They fall in love, and because Jennie (Sally Yeh) is now blind, she doesn't realize he was her assailant. To raise money for her cornea transplant, he takes a high risk political assassination, where he is spotted by the police. They trace him to his girlfriend and use her as bait, but the two lovers escape and hide out at a fellow hit man's hideaway. The determined Inspector Li (Danny Lee) pursues him as well as a gang of thugs who want him silenced. When the thugs arrive Li and Jeff stand shoulder to shoulder, to fight them off. Against impossible odds, Jeff finally takes a bullet to save Jenie. As a final act of chivalry, Jeff he wills his corneas to Jennie. Nice touch.  It's about, love friendship, honor and guns, yeah mostly it's about guns. The final 15 minute gunfight is like the OK Corral with Uzis. It might not be to your taste, but it is over the top and a must for CYF fans. Cantonese w/subtitles 128 minutes Rated II 2000

Killing Zoe They are supposed to be a handpicked group of professional bank robbers, and initially they appear prety hardcore. They bring along an American safe cracking expert, who begins to wonder if these guys really know what they're doing. It all unwinds in a violent, stressful 90 minutes. French/English with subtitles.

King of the Gypsies Correct me if I'm wrong, I think Eric Roberts stars in this Hollywood version of New York Gypsy life. It gives some humorous insight into some of the more common scams used to raise funds for the tribe. Not as gritty as the two above but certainly more amusing.

King of the Hill A kid is virtually abandoned by his tubercular mother and his hustling father in a depression era mid west hotel. Left to his own resources and the few folks who help him out, this resourceful character hangs on. Spalding Gray plays a believable has been creepy neighbor. Outstanding and just weird enough to be captivating. 1993 110 Min. rated PG-13

Kiss or Kill Nikki (Frances O'Connor) and Al (Matt Day) have this con going where she seduces businessmen, drugs them and then they rob them. It's working pretty well until they one of their victims turns up on the 11 o'clock news, as a corpse. Uh oh. To complicate matters they've stolen a blackmailers video off the guy and are stupid enough to try and cash it in. Now they have the cops and the blackmail victim, Zipper Doyle, on their tails and corpses are piling up in the outback. Australian Written and directed by Bill Bennett Rated R 1997 97 minutes

Kiss Toledo Goodbye When the last independent video store in 100 miles, went broke last month, we bought all the films with Christopher Walken or Crispin Glover in them. This one features the former, but he'd probably try to deny it. Kevin (Michael Rappaport) is the long lost son of mob boss Robert Forster. When Forster gets blown up, dad's crew (which includes Walken) adopts him as their new Don. His girlfriend (Christine Taylor) has a problem with that. God, its really awful.

Kitchen Stories  Here's a rather odd premise for a movie. The Swedish Kitchen Research Institute set out in the 1950s to make daily chores more efficient for the average housewife and bachelor farmer. The group fielded a batch of observers to passively watch the daily activities of these selfsame bachelors. The film centers around one such researcher and the relationship that develops as he sits in his high chair making notes on his unmarried male subject.  Since any interaction might skew the study, the farmer chooses, at first, to ignore his minder. The humor is slow and decidedly dry. One gets the feeling that you are missing 90% of the inside jokes and stereotypes of the rare bird, and yet enough comes through to reward the patient viewer. Little substantive dialogue so don't count on this film to improve your Swedish vocabulary. Directed by Bent Hamer.  Rated PG, 95 minutes Swedish with Subtitles

Koma There's a scalpel wielding kidney thief preying on women in Shanghai. Ching accidentally stumbles across on of the unfortunate victims while attending a friends wedding. She incorrectly identifies a woman Suen Ling as the possible organ collector. Actually, Suen was at the hotel stalking Ching's boyfriend. Now, Ching is being stalked by the scalpel wielding ex girlfriend of her fiancé. Yet when Ching is drugged in a bar and kidnapped by a band of freelance organ thieves Suen comes to her rescue, perhaps so she an carve her up at a later date. The two women share more than a boyfriend  and after the rescue these two become friends, with some strange results. As it turns out, Ching is actually in need of a transplant, herself, and it looks likely that her boyfriend, the surgeon, may be behind the renal larceny. Huh? Nicely filmed but the poor subtitles only added to the confusion. 90 minutes Cantonese Rated IIb 2004

Kuch Kuch Hota Hai This award winning Bollywood blockbuster may well be director Karan Johar's Hindi version of Grease. It is essentially a High School love story with memorable music and three gorgeous stars. Anjeli (Kajo) is a tomboy who has the hots for Rahul (Shakrukh Khan) who in turn has designs on Tina ( Rani Mukherji) . The weird part is the scenery; which is supposed to replicate an American high school. I saw it dubbed in Burmese and still got most of the story. Better than average music. DVD and VHS Hindi/English slang w/subtitles The title means "something happened" in Hindi. 1999 Rated PG 177 minutes Hindi & English w/subtitles

Kung Fu Hustle It's the Axe Gang versus the residents of Pig Sty Alley in Steven Chow's hysterical spoof on Chinese kung fu gangster films. Wonderfully stylized with dancing gangsters and killer tailors there is something here for everyone. Set in the 1930s,the poor residents of this neighborhood are more than a match for these murderous gangs. The landlady proves to be the most formidable fighter of the lot and the special effects and over the top fights make full use of Chows martial arts choreographic skills (see Kill Bill). The film takes a mystical turn towards the end and the excellent special effects help carry it off. This was a huge hit in Asia but will undoubtedly fizzle after it's US release. Check out all the awful teeth. We loved it. 2004 Chinese w/subtitles.

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A Lamb in Despair A Hong Kong serial killer, Ted, returns home after a homicidal stint in the USA. he was apparently accused of 25 murders in the US but was acquitted on all counts. The local media hound him and a lonely social worker decides to help him out. Through flashbacks, we see how poor Ted was abused by mom, which explains the chained up sex slaves in his garden shed. He eventually gets caught by a consortium of a newspaper reporter, his social worker, his dad and the police. . There is a request at the end, that we all treat our children well. Cantonese w/English subtitles 90 minutes. 

Last Exit to Brooklyn This German/American Uli Edel transformation of Hugh Selby,Jr.'s novel could reverse the affects of a Zoloft overdose. True to the book, it is set in the docks of Brooklyn during the 1950's. Jennifer Jason Leigh steals the film with her portrayal of the burned out slut Tralala. This book and maybe even the movie were banned in a number of places. Not to be confused with A Tree Grows in Brooklyn.1990 102 minutes VHS*

The Last Movie Dennis Hoper and Peter Fonda made this addled film with the money they made on Easy Rider. It is a mess.

The Last Seduction Linda Fiorentino plays a seductress that the Pope could not refuse. Her husband, Bill Pullman is a Dentist who makes a big score selling pharmaceutical cocaine. He comes home with a shopping bag full of cash, which she steals while he's in the shower. She evades her pursuers and eventually doubles back to finish off her husband.  If Fatal Attraction did not keep your spouse from straying this one certainly will. She is so beautiful, why must she be so mean? Directed by John Dahl 1994 110 minutes Rated R

Last Tango in Paris Never got through this and when we fast forwarded to the famous margarine scene, it was way over rated. Stick with Apocalypse Now if you want to see Marlon overact.

The Last Wave Another Australian classic that is an essential viewing for all you Peter Weir fans. Recommended by Matt Kenneke who says it is....Eerie and entertaining, plus it has the omnipresent David Gumpilil. An attorney takes a pro bono case defending an aborigineon trial for murder.He gets enmeshed in wild dreams that imply he has little understanding of this mystical culture that surrounds him. 1977 110 minutes Rated PG 

Lawn Dogs The people of Camelot Gardens housing estates truly enjoy the security and banality of life in an affluent synthetic community. Everyone that is, except ten year old Devon who crosses the tracks while on a quest to sell her scout cookies. She meets up with her family's lawn cutter,Trent ( Sam Rockwell) while knocking on trailer doors. Despite their differences in social standing, he carefully initiate Devon in the 3D life available outside the gates. There is nothing plausible about any of it, and the director John Duigan reminds you every 90 seconds of the social chasm between the characters. All rich people are boring social climbing dick heads and the white trash lifestyle is honest and interesting and fatal.None the less, Mischa Burton is great as Devon and there are pockets of subtlety shining through Naomi Wallaces screenplay. 1997 Rated R 100 minutes 1/99

A Life Less Ordinary There have been an overabundance of kidnapping movies lately. You can skip Palmetto, but this one is fairly funny. The cast is great. Ewan MacGregor( remember him from Trainspotting) is the reluctant kidnapper while Cameron Diaz is his helpfull kidnapee. The story is enhanced by Holly Hunter and Delroy Linds who are angels empowered to teach humans the value of a loving relationship. There are an awful lot of angel movies around too ! It sounds preachy but they resort to automatic weapons, car crashes and time bombs to get their point across. Stanley Tucci is the orthodontist husband of Diaz and Ian Holm also has a bit part. Rated R 1997 12/98

Like Water for Chocolate An great version of a confusing book written by Laura Esquivel. Similar to the two above, this film deals with peoples relationships through their love of cooking. A younger sister must prepare the wedding feast for her older sisters marriage to the man she loves. She becomes a mystic cook that alters the behavior of her appreciative diners. Directed by Alfonso Arua,( the author's husband) the characters and the acting are superb. 1992 Unrated 112 Minutes

The Limey Why are Americans so fascinated with hard ass British criminals? Perhaps  we can't believe there are genuine social menaces lurking amongst such a polite race of people.  Regardless, Terrance Stamp is excellent as a cockney ex con who comes to LA to find his daughter's killer. Yes, he is polite, but very mad. Essentially this is a Charles Bronson movie with a UK accent. A good primer for English rhyming slang. Directed by Steven Soderbergh, with Peter Fonda, Lesley Ann Warren and Luiz Guzman. 1999  Rated R 95 minutes.

Little Boy Blue pretty good!

Live Flesh This is not truly an odd film but you may find a lone copy languishing in you local video emporium. If you want to brush up on Spanish vulgarity, it's a wellspring of colorful vocabulary. The main character gets into an argument with a rather colorful woman he'd met the night before. They get into a struggle, the police arrive and the gun goes off. He does time, and when released he tracks her down only to find she has married the wounded policeman. There are way too many coincidences for your average cynical viewer. 1997 Rated R 101 minutes Spanish w/subtitles

Living in Oblivion This Tom Dicillo film holds a mirror up to the independant film business. Steve Buscemi does a great job as the bedraggled director whose cast dissolves around him. Filmed in B&W and color it probably is pretty close to the mark. 1995 Rated R 90 minutes

The Legend of Suram Fortress This may be the only Georgian language films available on video and is a Russian interpretation of a Fellini movie. If you can find this one , let me know how you liked it.

Leningrad Cowboys Go America This may be one of the best Finnish movies you'll ever see. You might say this film is the Russian equivalent of Spinal Tap. Winner of the best hairdo award at the Cannes festival you can even show this one to small children, but they will probably leave the room. Directed by Aki Kaurismaki, if you like this on, try and find the second best Finnish film of all time Ariel .

The Little Chinese Seamstress Two urban young men Ma and Luo, are sent upriver during the Cultural Revolution for a little re-education. Peasant life if not too their liking, but they manage to steal a suitcase full of forbidden European literature, which helps pass the time. They also become enamored with a local girl who has a little more spunk than her contemporaries, and they begin reading their forbidden books to her. The boys teach her to read and she is soon aware that her mountain village is too small for her ambitions. The scenery and the photography are awe inspiring and the frankness of the subject matter shows a new liberalness that adds dimension to the tale. Even the subtitles did a decent job of showing the complexities of the poor souls who were flattened by this so called revolution. Long but not endless and the director gets in a little dig about the social and environmental damage of the Three Gorges dam. 112 minute, Mandarin 2003

Little Shop of Horrors If you are eaten by a plant, it is not technically belong on this page either. Jack Nicholsons' first major screen appearance as a masochistic dental patient. 1960

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels They need to raise a half million quid in a hurry or Hatchet Harry will start slicing off their fingers. It seems these four losers dropped a bundle to Harry in a rigged card game and they go to great criminal lengths in an effort to save their digits. This is actually a comedy and it was written & directed by Guy Ritchie . Sting is in it, too. 1998 Briitish w/American sub-titles Rated R 106 minutes

Lolita Jeremy Irons takes from radical chances with his career. This is technically a much better film adaptation of Nabokov's diaries of Humbert Humbert, the pedophile professor than the Stanley Kubrick version from 1962. It is also more disturbing. Melani Griffith plays Lolita's hot mother much better than Shelly Winters, and you may wish she had a bigger part. Not for the sexually sqeamish or anyone raising a teenage daughter. 1997 Unrated 4/99

London Kills Me This may well be the English version of My Own Private Idaho. A street drug hustler, Clint, needs a new pair of shoes so he can get a good job and give up working for his friend Muff Diver. This might be Hanif Kureishi's first film. Check out My Beautiful Laundrette and Sammy and Rosie Get Laid. 1991 106 Min rated R English

Lone Star Actually, this is a murder mystery and a good one at that. However, if you pay attention to the last scene, you'll find it may really have been about a rather unexpected extended family. John Sayles made this, but you already knew that. 1996 135 min rated R

The Lost Boys West coast punks are actually a pack of new wave vampires. Keiffer Sutherland is one of the many young actors who got a boost from this popular stylish thriller. 1987 99 minutes Rated R thanks to MadlineK for the recommendation

Lost Highway Let's see, Bill Pullman kills his wife, Patricia Arquette and he is on death row. Something happens and he gets transposed into someone else. That's the only part I understood, except of course the wild sex (be sure and get the NC 17 cut) . So, what if it's very very confusing ? This film is filled with spooky shots of some evil looking dude plus lots of fog, drapery and Lynchisms. Recommended exclusively for die hard David Lynch fans because the rest of you will just be perplexed. I watched it twice and, no, I can't explain it. Good cameo appearances by Marilyn Manson, Henry Rollins, Mink Stole and Jack the Dog. 1997 Rated NC-17/R 135 minutes

Love and a .45 Watty Watts (Gil Bellows) makes a habit of robbing convenience stores with an unloaded gun. He checks the I Ching to steel up for the task which he considers his personal art form.  It was his grandfather who told him you only need 2 things in life, you guessed it "Love and a .45". Renee Zellweger is his underage girlfriend Starlene, in case you wondered what she did before she was famous (aside from Texas Chain Saw Massacre 6). Watty has a friend named Billy ('..a speed sucking psychopath') , whom he met in prison, and they occasionally commit crimes together. One of their robberies goes sour and when a clerk gets shot, their lives turn south.  Star and Watty have to get out of Dodge, so like all good Texas outlaws, they head for Mexico. They get married enroute and honeymoon while on the lam. They are chased by a drug addled trio of low rent debt collectors as well as the full contingent of Texas law enforcement personnel.  Peter Fonda is Star's father Virgil, " a handicapped suburban hippy".  He gives them a 1000 mg Sandoz purple acid as a wedding present. This film tries too hard to be Tarentinoesque, but it has some highlights. Directed by C.M.Talkington 1995  Rated R 102 minutes

Love and Death on Long Island An aging widower author (John Hurt) steps into the wrong theatre. Instead of a stuffy art film he is treated to an American T&A college film that stars the voluptuous Ronnie Barstock (Jason Priestly) . Giles De'ath is so smitten by the young actor, that he returns the next day to re-view the film. Before long, he is buying teen fanzines and renting Ronnie's other atrocious movies. This otherwise staid British gentleman, begins adopting Americanisms eating pizza and perplexing his associates. When he can stand it no longer, Giles travels to Long Island to stalk his prey.  He meets with mixed success, but you'll have to watch it to really appreciate the subtle humor that pervades this simple plot. Ronnie's girlfriend, Audrey, as played by Fiona Leowi is every bit as good as Hurt. Rated PG 93 minutes 1996 British  

The Low Life Matt got a good education but he takes a series of temp jobs till his writing career kicks in. Meantime the Raman noodle   roommate lifestyle is wearing thin. His latest roomie is a sad soul who paints miniature soldiers and  just wants some attention. This pathetic sap makes Matt realize, hey, my life doesn't really suck after all. Directed by George Hickenlooper who made the Apocalypse Now documentary Heart of Darkness. Sean Astin, Kyra Sedgewick, Rory Cochrane and Renee Zelwegger are in the cast. 96 minutes Rated R 1995

Lulu on the Bridge Harvey Keitel is the jazz saxophonist Izzy Maurer who gets shot in the lung and can no longer play so now he wanders around. Paul Auster wrote and directed this confusing mystery/thriller/science fiction tale about a mysterious rock that Izzy finds in a dead man's briefcase. He calls a phone number that was also in the brief case and Celia Burns (Mira Sorvino) turns up. The two of them groove together as the stone glows blue and floats in midair. Willem Dafoe , Mandy Patamkin and Vanessa Redgrave are three more reasons to take this off the shelf, but don't be fooled, sometimes even surplus talent cannot save a mediocre film. Maybe DAVID Lynch got his inspiration for Mullholland Drive from here. Rated PG13 103 minutes 1998

The Luzhin Defense Based on a Vladamir Nabakov novel, this is the tale of a child chess prodigy who is lost in the real world. John Turturro is the hapless Alexander Luzhin and Emily Watson is the young socialite who tries to coax him into the real world. Set between the warsin an elegant European spa, director Marleen Gorris does a great job at pointing Turturro in the right direction. Torn between his old chess mentor and his new found love, Luzin is further stressed by the championhip he must play for the world title. The book translates well and the acting is sublime, so watch it, to see how it ends. 2000 PG13 106 minutes

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M Peter Lorrie is a whistling child molester/murder in this Fritz Lang talkie. Similar to Freaks, the street urchins band together in the cause of justice. Truly scarey. When I first saw this, I waited around at the end because I thought the film had broken. Skip the remake from the fifties if you accidentally find it.. 1931 100 minutes

Magnolia Hard to explain and really long, what more do you want to know?

Man Bites Dog Certain people will be offended by this French quasi documentary about an out of control murderer. I no longer recommend this movie to friends, and suggest you do the same. If you enjoy (?) this movie, you're going to love Henry-Portrait of A Serial Killer.

The Man Who Fell To Earth If David Bowie were not in this poorly photographed version of an excellent book, it would suck. It's the story of a brilliant alien who uses his superior technical know-how to attain wealth while stranded on earth. Wealth does not bring happiness and he devolves into an alien alcoholic. Look for the British original; it drags on 30 minutes longer than the US cut. 1976 140 minutes Rated R but just barely.

The Man Who Wasn't There Billy Bob Thorton stars in this latest Coen brothers offering set in the fifties about a simple man whose life makes a left turn  He toils daily in his brother in laws barbershop, but yearns for a little something better. He decides his way out is to go into the dry cleaning business but he is a little short of capital. To raise the cash he blackmails his wife's boss played by James Gandolfini (who's getting lots of work these days). The photography is beyond great. It would make Orsen Welles jealous. The whole thing is a wee bit too long, but otherwise this is a film lover's wet dream. 2001 Rated R  

The Man Without a Past This is an unforgettable amnesia movie by the acclaimed Finnish director Aki Kaurismaki. His sparse but funny dialogue is accentuated by grim scenery and grimmer characters that remind you of a Jim Jarmusch movie made in an indiscernible language. The main character is a nameless man Markku Peltola) who is beaten senseless as he exits the Helsinki train station. With assistance from other downtrodden Helsinkians, he takes up residence in a sea container and tries to build a present without his past. A similarly lost Irma who works for the Salvation Army takes pity on him and an awkward romance ensues. This is quickly squelched when the police discover his past and his wife. Irma ( Kati Outinen) won best actress for her part at the 2002 Cannes Festival where Kaurismaki was given the Grand Prix. We highly recommend his classic "The Leningrad Cowboys Go America" if you've never seen it. 97 minute Finish w/subtitles 2002 Rated PG13

Marebito Masuoka is a man obsessed with images, and he lives half in the real world and half through the viewfinder of a videocamera. He constantly replays his footage of a man who killed himself in a subway station. The man's look of terror fascinates Masuoka and he longs to experience that same emotion. While randomly wandering and filming around Tokyo, he discovers a maze of tunnels beneath the city. The first inhabitants he finds are homeless and afraid. Then he encounter Muriko the suicide victim from his video. Muriko explains the dangers of the Deros- short for detrimental Robots ( See Richard Shavers 1921 Sci Fi Classic) who are blood sucking inhabitants of this underground city. Further exploration brings him to an open canyon where he discovers a beautiful girl chained in a cavern. He brings her home, only to find that although she appears human , she is actually a Dero. Naming her "F" ,he taps his own blood supply  to keep her fed but before long he needs to supplement her diet. His ex wife comes around looking for their daughter and she becomes the first five liter donor. He enjoys the fear of his donors/victims and of course it all goes into his video collection. F is grateful for the baby bottles filled with blood and all in all it's a happy arrangement. But the plot, written and directed by Takashi Shimizu of Ju-On fame is far more twisted and visually disturbing than you'd anticipate. The director of Tetsuo-The Iron Man, Shinya Tsukamoto plays the lead part of the nerdy and perhaps insane cameraman. Just one more instance of sophisticated, adult scarey ass Japanese horror films that are often copied but never duplicated. The stiffs in Hollywood do not have the balls to make stuff this good, but don't get me started. 2005 Japanese 91 minutes Rated III (18 years+)

Marie Baie des Anges Meuville is a young woman at odds with her beautiful surroundings. She spends her summer on the French coast drinking, smoking and flirting with American soldiers. She gets into trouble when she helps a local kid rob a cafe and they hide out on a nearby island. It is a strange coming of age film that relies more on the scenery, emotion and beautiful actors/actresses than on a complex story. Directed by Manuel Pradal  French w/subtitles Rated R 1998

Marnie A minor Hitchcock film

Mars Attacks The jury is still out on this Tim Burton big budget spoof of War of The Worlds. A second viewing made me a trifle more inclined to like it. The cast includes absolutely everyone. 1996 103 minutes Rated PG 13

Ma Vie En Rose Ludovic is a seven year old boy that is convinced he is a girl. So he dresses as on and is prepared to marry the son of his dad's boss. This is all very awkward for the parents, and their family life strains under the harmless obsession of their son. The stressed out parents take Ludo to a physchiatrist, they cut his hair, they forbid him to wear dresses and still the neighbors shun them. Eventually dad loses his job and they move to a less affluent but more accepting town. It's all too allegorical. This is a ham fisted cutsey film that uses an unthreating kid to prove middle class Belgians are scared of anything strange (I.E. Gay). Who cares? Directed by Alain Berliner. Belgian 1998 89 minutes Rated R 11/98

Me,You,Them - Eu,Tu,El Darlene (Regina Case) is pregnant and she leaves her small Brazilian town to have her child elsewhere. She returns 3 years later with her toddler to find her mother has just died. With limited resources, Darlene arranges a marriage with a local man, Osias, 20 years her senior in exchange for a house. They have a son, but Osias is a lazy bum  and when his cousin Zezinho, comes to stay, Darlene has another son with him. Next Ciro comes along, a homeless handsome drifter and Darlene adds a fourth son to her brood with his assistance. All three men love her and they decide to share her affections rather than risk losing her. Osias adopts all the boys so they are legitimate and they live happily ever after. The scenery is bleak, life is poor but it is an incredible and unorthodox love story. PG13 107 minutes 2000 Brazilian Portugese w/English Subtitles

Memento Leonard has lost his short term memory. He compensates with Polaroid photos, lots of notes and tattooing the important stuff on hi chest and limbs. He can remember his wife and he recalls that someone named Sammy Jenks has killed her. By accumulating clues, he hopes to avenge her death. Not any easy task, when the clues dissolve before you can write them down. Natalie is trying to help him, or is she just setting him up to avenge her boyfriend's murder. There's a lot of questions here and a random time frame feeds you the answers in a disorderly sequence. If you pay close attention you may be able to solve Leonard's riddle. Directed by Christopher Nolan  adapted from the book "Memento Mori" 2000 DVD  Thanks to Jeff Giddens who insisted we bring this film to your attention.

Men With Guns John Sayles staunchly refuses to be typecast. This latest project is filmed in Spanish and Central American Indian dialects and filmed on location. It walks the moral line between the armies brutal support of the European ruling classes and the bloody retribution of the rebels on the indigenous population. The story unfolds as a city doctor ( played by Federico Luppi) heads into the countryside to visit his old medical students. Every mile and every day brings him closer to the realization he has been living a delusional life back in the city. A young boy, displaced by the revolution guides and enlightens the doctor through the jungle. This is a subtle tale that may take a day or two to sink in, it is latently disturbing and unsettling. Why is Mandy Patinkin in this film? 128 minutes 1997 Rated R 12/98

The Messenger  Luc Besson's rendition of the Joan of Arc story. Kind of a French version of Braveheart, watch this one for the great 15th century battle scenes. Milla Javovich, who was in Besson's  The Fifth Element, plays a beautiful Joan and John Malkovich is the prince who sells her out. Way too long and pandering too much to main stream cinema, it is still a talented piece of work. There are times you may think this is the Sound of Music, but stick it out to see Dustin Hoffman as God. 

Metroland Marion and Chris have been married for a few years, living out in Metroland, a London suburb that was schemed up after the war. They have a kid and a Volvo and are pretty settled in until Chris's old mate Toni turns up. Chris starts partying and he has some serious doubts about his bourgeois life. Toni eggs him on and it ends up in a serious row with Marion (Emily Watson) proving to be the toughest of the three. Directed by Philip Seville and taken from the novel by Julian Barnes.102 minutes, British 1999  Rated R

Midaq Alley A Mexican adaptation of the Naguib Mafouz novel, these are life stories of a group of tenants in a low rent building. Each story is simultaneous and loosely intertwined. The clock keeps resetting as we view a dominoes game from each characters perspective. There is something for everyone; drugs, sex ( straight and kinked ), love, passion and betrayal. This is not a traditional odd film, but it is good and you might pass it by with that lousy title. In Spanish the film is called" El Callejon de los Milagros". 101 minutes Unrated Subtitled 5/99

Midnight Fly Michele embarks on a trip through France only to find her husband will not be accompanying her. A fellow tour member, a young Japanese woman, Miki, endears herself to Michele by vomiting in her lap at the start of the journey. They eventually become fast friends and continue on to Morocco, when the tour has concluded. They spend a lot of time discussing their relationships; Michele's eroding marriage and Miki's married boyfriend. After some time they both realize, independently, that they're in love with the same man back in Hong Kong.  Meanwhile, Miki, gets kidnapped and sold into prostitution, which almost seems plausible, if it were not such a Kasbah cliché. Michele stops her life to look for her new friend, and eventually her husband arrives to take her home. She sends him packing and continues to search relentlessly for her husbands mistress. A sad but touching story with excellent performances by Junna Risa as Miki and Anita Mui as Michele.  Cantonese & English w/subtitles Rated IIA  2 hours

Mr. Saturday Night Billy Crystal plays a Borscht belt comedian who is a prick. He really did a great job with this Milton Burlish character who has no real redeemable features. Not bad for a rainy night and you can usually find a copy in the used movie bin for less than the cost of a two night rental.

Mr. Vincent Perhaps the last of the First Rites series, this is another tale of love and obsession. John Vincent is a poor song writer with a failed marriage. To make things worse, he lives in Yonkers.  John meets up with Lisa, an old high school acquaintance and they begin dating. Both on the rebound, they keep it at arms length for awhile and John seems to be doing okay. Lisa's friends and family, don't take too well to him. When she begins to cool off, he starts loosing traction. Director Robert Celestino does an excellent job of slowly exposing the depth of  John Vincent's  desperation. Before long, he is climbing through her window, reading her mail and listening to her phone messages. It gets worse, much worse and neither of them can stop the train. Frank John Hughes is Mr. Vincent and Lisa Lo Cicero plays the victimized Lisa. This gets a little scary because it's too real for fiction. Very well done. B&W 2000 Unrated 90 minutes

Moho Han This one is a Japanese serial murder mystery with a New Age twist. Amikawa is a handsome TV personality that uses his charm to lure homicide assistants and victims. Mariko falls victim and her grandfather relentlessly dogs the killers. His love of his granddaughter overpowers their high tech digital approach to murder. Very stylish and a technically exciting film that falls back on the Japanese theme of family values conquer all.

Momento Mori  Min Ah finds a diary on her way to the all girls high school she attends. After reading it , she discovers it was written by two of her classmates who are lovers. She watches them clandestinely fascinated by them until one of the pair jumps off the school roof. The dead girl begins to haunt the school until a teacher Mr. Goh, also commits suicide. It's not clear if this is a tragic lesbian love story or a High School horror film, perhaps it's neither. Directed by Kim Tae-Yong  Korean w/English subtitles. Rated IIb 90 minutes

Monsieur Hire He has no friends, and he will readily admit that he is not a likable kind of guy. Michel Blanc play the reclusive tailor, Mssr Hire, who is obsessed with Alice, whom he watches from his apartment window. He can't imagine why she is so nice to him even after she discovers his peeping . This is a tight and anxiety producing version of the George Simenon novel "Les Fiancailles de Mssr.Hire." It pays homage to Hitchcock's Rear Window, and it does the old boy proud. 1989 Rated PG 90 minutes French w/subtitles

Monsoon Wedding This Holly/Bollywood hybrid has actually made it onto the multiplex circuit, much to everyone's surprise. The talented Mira has walked the thin line that shuts down most American viewers when exposed to Hindi dance extravaganzas She has also stepped over the line that keeps most Hindi films from discussing overt or unpleasant sexual subjects. The result is an entertaining film that challenges both western and eastern viewers. The actual story is a Hindi standard of the melding of two clans through a wedding feast  and all it's social complexities. The filming is colorful, the music is rocking and the story is a mild masala, that seems palatable to American tastes. Hindi and English w/subtitles

Il Monstro Roberto Begnini directs and stars in this Italian sex farce that only he could save. Mistake for a sexual deviant, he is persued by a daring police woman, Nicoletta Braschi. The plot is as bad as any Jerry Lewis movie but if you are a a Begnini fan, than track down a copy.

Monument Ave. Ted Demme delivers a scary story of Boston Irish toughs on their home turf. Filmed on location, Denis Leary is Bobby O'Grady, a talented thug working for the local boss Jackie ( Colm Meany) . They share the same girlfriend and have a similar code of ethics unique to this subculture. Dogged by Detective Leary of Roxbury (Martin Sheen) Bobby gets a little uneasy as his friends are killed for minor discretions in the code. Seen through a steady haze of boilermakers and cocaine, this is not an easy neighborhood to leave, alive.  Good story and great acting all around.  1999, rated R

Mother's Boys Jamie Lee Curtis will resort to anything to get her kids away from her husband, including incest. Awful stuff and we're sure Jamie uses a body double for the good parts. Rated R 96 Min

Motel Hell A farmer played by Rory Calhoun makes smoked meat treats from human road kill. He plants still living feedstock in his garden up to their necks in dirt. Wolfman Jack is in this classic which is slightly better than most . 1980 Rated R 90 minutes

Mughal_E-Azam (King of the World) This is a Hindi classic love story of a Mughal prince's wish  to marry a beautiful commoner over his father's objections. Prince Salim is so smitten by the consort Anakarlai that his incites a civil war to overcome his father's refusal to permit their marriage . She undergoes prison and repeated threats, but she will not give up her love . Very long, very romantic and the war scenes are productions worthy of Cecil B. DeMille. The crucial scenes are in an early for of color film in this B&W extravaganza.

Mullholland Drive Okay, let's have an open forum on just what this film is about. Here is our interpretation: Director David Lynch starts out with a captivating and coherent story of a woman who wanders away from a car wreck . She is disoriented and sneaks into someone's apartment and falls asleep. She is discovered by Betty who just arrived in LA and is house-sitting for her movie star aunt. Betty finds the amnesiac crash victim, Rita, in the shower and instead of chucking her out, Betty decides to help her. They snoop around, discover the rotting corpse of Diane Selwyn and visit an unusual nightclub that Rita recalls from her past. This is where the story loses traction. Rita had a blue key in her purse, and they put it into a mysterious aluminum cube. There is a bit of a Scooby Doo scene and everyone switches characters and histories. The result is a film that is like half "Lost Highway" grafted on to "Blue Velvet ".  Like "Lost Highway", the sex scenes are very erotic, and should be especially appealing to the gay female and straight male viewing public. Remember Ann Miller, well she is super as Betty's landlady, Coco. Help us out here, send us your thoughts on this one. 2001 Rated R 2 hours

Muriel's Wedding You really don't have to feel sorry for Muriel even though you feel compelled to. She'll be all right if she can just get past all that bad music she keeps humming. Australian director/writer P.J.Hogan made this simple story into a twisted affair by sheer talent. 1994 rated R 100 min.

My Beautiful Launderette A wonderful English tale of Omar and Johnny (Daniel Day-Lewis) their Laundromat and their interracial love story. Like other Kureishi films it is critical of the treatment of Pakistani émigrés in the UK.  Written by Hanif Kureishi and directed by Stephen Frears. 1985 Unrated 90 minutes

My Big Fat Greek Wedding Another ethnic wedding film that has also made it out of the art house circuit. This independent feature was written by and stars Nia Vardalos. Nula is a frumpy single Greek woman who tragically is unwed at the ripe old age of 30. Beaten into frumpiness by her Greek restaurant hostess job and constricted by her misogynist old world father, she yearns for a change. With the contrivance of her mother (Lainie Kazan) , Nula takes a night course and soon crosses paths with Ian Mill ( John Corbett of Sex in the City and Northern Exposure fame) . He nurtures her and helps her bust out of her Greek constrictions. This guy is too good to be true and they stick it out in a funny sit com sort of way right through to the happy ending. You should take your mother to see this. This, probably should not be on this page, but in our defense, we wrote it back when it was first released and not the independent film success story of the year.

My Dinner With Andre Who would guess you'd sit through two hours of watching Wallace Shawn and Andre Gregory eat in a restaurant. Louis Malle directed this minimalist film, that could only a playwright could have conceived. You'll either like it or find it all pretentious NY avante garde malarkey. 1981 Rated PG 110 minutes

My Own Private Idaho From the makers of Drugstore Cowboy, (Gus Van Sant) this is the tale of two street hustlers from two distinctly different families. River Phoenix and Keanu Reeves dominate this smarmy tale of the extended family of kids on the street. Who is this guy Flea that plays himself ? 1991 100 min Rated -R

My Son The Fanatic Parvez (Om Puri) is Pakistan immigrant who drives a cab in the UK. After 20 years in the country, he's having a little trouble sorting out his allegiances. When he begins a love affair with a local hooker, Madeline (Rachel Griffiths) he really starts to lose his Asian ways, which includes his wife, best friend, coworkers and most of all his son. To makes things worse his son Farid, who is his pride and joy, takes up with a band of Orthodox Muslims and begins to criticize his father's sinful ways. Written by Hanif Kureishi   87 Minutes English 1998 Rated R

Mystery Train Since we are discussing Jim Jarmusch movies, this one has a great part, where two Japanese tourist's tool around Memphis checking out the sites. Similar in format to Night on Earth, there are three concurrent stories all taking place in a Memphis fleabag hotel. The night deskman is a well dressed Screamin Jay Hawkins. The more I watch this film, the better I like it. The cast includes the late Joe Strummer, Steve Buscemi and lots of major indie film talent.

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Naked Weapon A very evil woman Madame M kidnaps forty athletic young girls from all over the world so she can train them to become assassins at her private island compound. It takes a few years but the striplings soon turn into efficient killing machines. She then turns them on each other to Darwinize her pack down to three remaining candidates. Two of the girls, Charlene(Maggie Q and Katt (Anya) have been close friends since their arrival on the island and they make a particularly efficient hit squad. Meanwhile, FBI Agent Jack (Daniel Wu) has been working this case for a number of years and finally apprehends Charlene who is one of the infamous China Doll assassins. She escapes, but not before stealing his heart. Blah, blah. blah  Some very pretty people, some over-computerized Kung Fu and a lame tale that is a decent diversion for a rainy afternoon. Directed by Tony Ching Siu Tung and it is in English. 2002

Naked Lunch A weird screen translation of the William Burroughs classic. An exterminator gets hooked on roach powder is some of the decipherable parts of the plot. Semi autobiographical it is at least as understandable as the book. This movie is not recommended for 95% of the population.

The Nasty Girl This is a well told story of a high school girl in Germany who starts out writing an essay on her town during the war. She uncovers a few thing that make most everyone squeamish. 1990 rated PG-13 90 min. subtitled/German   

Natural Born Killers My aversion to Oliver Stone movies has kept me from renting this. There is an unrated directors cut that is a full hour longer than the 118 minute general release. In the spirit of thoroughness, will someone please send a review of this film so I don't have to watch it. Please.

New Rose Hotel Tri-lingual credits hold out great hopes for this well cast tale of international corporate espionage. Christopher Walken is an old hand at the game training Willem Defoe to pry a Japanese biochemist away from his employer. They hire Asia Argento to seduce Maas away from his icy Nordic wife. Very high tech,, spastic film style that leaves huge gaps for the viewer to fill in. If you wait, however, the entire film gets regurgitated in flashbacks so you get to see it all twice. All style, little substance your basic 45 minute movie in an hour and a half. Rated R 1999  90 minutes

Next Time This is a Laundromat tale. A just off the bus, artist from Ohio, (Christian Campbell) befriends a street wise woman( Jonelle Allen)  twice his age. She is mystified why this white kid would want to live in south central LA. Over a string of Saturday nights she imparts a little of her wisdom and he transfer some of his optimism to their mutual benefit. Director  L. Alan Fraser does a excellent job of keeping this tight screenplay in motion with the help of Allen and Campbell's talent. a First Rites Film 2000 unrated 96 minutes

Niagara, Niagara Seth is a kleptomaniac who lives with his toothless dad. He meets Marcey (Robin Tunney ) while they are simultaneously pocketing goods at their local drug store. Seth ( Henry Thomas from Spanking the Monkey) is smitten and his love grows even after he finds the Marcey has Tourettes Syndrome and is prone to fits of yelling, violence, tics and lots of unusual behavior. Robin Tunney does an outstanding job portraying this misunderstood malady and the writers are certainly not trying to elicit our sympathy. It's tempting to describe this film as 'powerful' but the ending is a bit too pat, even if the subject is otherwise unorthodox. The good parts outnumber the weak spots. 1998 Rated R 106 minutes 8/17/99

The Night of the Living Dead If you are eaten by Zombies, is that truly considered cannibalism ? Dawn of The Dead is better, if you like zombie films.

The Night of Cabiria/Le Notti Di CabiriaMade in 1957 and recently rereleased on DVD this is one of Federico Fellini's more normal films . Cabiria is a Roman streetwalker with the proverbial heart of gold. The movie begins with her latest lover stealing her purse and leaving her to drownd. Rescued by a couple of kids, she picks herself up, goes home and tosses out all his gifts and photos. Cabiria is played by Giulietta Masina who is a comic impresario on a par with Roberto Begnino. Her facial expressions and physical antics make the sub titles superfluous. The film follows Cabiria through a few weeks of her unusual life and undoubtedly was the model for 'Sweet Charity' . Giulieta won best actress at the 1957 Cannes festival , for good reason. Has she done anything else available on video? Unrated B&W 1957 86 minutes Italian w/subtitles

Night On Earth This Jim Jarmusch movie is actually five vignettes set in five different cities in taxi cabs on the same night. Roberto Begnini is a cabdriver in Rome and although it is in Italian, you will not need the sub titles to realize he is a comic lunatic. The other four have some good spots, but you'll rewind this one a few times. Begnini was miscast as the son of the Pink Panther, but check out the movie below if you enjoyed this one.

Nil By Mouth This family has its share of heroin addicts, alcoholics wife beaters and cigarette smokers. Written and direct by Gary Oldmam, this is a punch in the eye documentary style film about a lower class urban British family. If English is not your primary language ( or you are American) , you may find the slang and accents a trifle unintelligible. The characters and the acting are first rate. In spite of their hardness, this is a tight family in a tough time and place. After Valerie (Kathy Burke) is beaten senseless by her loving husband Ray ( Ray Winstone) her mother asks " Val, do you still love him?" Charlie Creed-Miles gets an award for the best junkie, ever, with a hyphenated last name. Not recommended for children. 1998 Rated R 128 minutes 11/98

Ninth Gate This film was in theatres for about a week, so we anxiously awaited the video release. It has a good cast with Johnny Depp as the bibliophilic Dean Corso and Emmanuele Seigneur as the girl with the green eyes. Roman Polanski directed this adaptation of the novel "El Club Dumas", a rather stuffy tale about collectors of  arcane books. Corso sets out to authenticate a rare volume on devil worship for a New York client and get enmeshed in a wealthy diabolic cult while tooling around Europe. The settings are marvelous but you can't help but feel Polanski in pandering to American audiences. The first question Corso asks anyone is "Excuse me, but do you speak English? " It's a pretty funny question coming from a hyper educated book expert who reads a dozen languages. The violence is also too low key for American sensibilities. If some guy has a book that you want, hell, just shoot him and take it. Why chase him up and down the Seine in a car and tug at his bag? Anyway, to us, this was kind of a disappointment, but maybe you'll think otherwise. 133 minutes Rated R 19

Nobody Three young ad execs are enjoying a night out at a tokyo bar when they have an altercation with some guys at an adjacent table. A fight is narrowly avoided and the three friend decide to go elsewhere. When Konishi goes back to the bar for his umbrella he crosses paths with the other group and they drub him soundly. Vowing revengr the other two Taki and Nambi go looking for their adversaries, but fail to find them. realizing revenge is childish, the three friends decide to let it go. That is, until they bump into one nambis attackers in a subway. The pound him and leave him near dead. This starts a chain of events and counter attacks that spiral out of control. Lots of otherwise stalwart Tokyo citizens end up badly damaged. Violent by japanese standards, but a 12 year old American might find the whole thing a bit silly. Filmed in the dark and written and directed by Shundo Okawa in 1999 100 minutes unrated

Nosferatu The original and by far still the spookiest vampire (Max Schreck) on film. If you have only seen short clips form this grandmother of this genre, get a copy out of the library. Orson Wells stole wholesale from FW Murnau's scary shadow scenes. 1922, 84 minutes Silent

Nosferatu the Vampyre Klaus Kinski plays an excellent Count D. in the Werner Herzog remake of the Murnau silent film. You may have to import this one as nobody's seen it on the shelf in North America. It's available in German and English but I don't know which one is the original. Ola Lundin informs me the German version is 9 minutes longer and preferred by many. Even if Herzog films try your patience, this one should redeem his good name. 100 minutes 1979

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O Brother Where Art Thou? This latest Coen Brothers film is a a George Clooney showcase that s a 1930's update of  The Odyssey. George is Ulysses or Everett McGill a chain gang employee who has Pete (John Turturro) and Delmar ( Tim Blake Nelson) as his chain mates. They make a break for it and the threesome hobble off through the countryside in search of Ulysses' hidden gold. Their first encounter is with a blind prophet who is slowly cranking a hand cart down the tracks. After foretelling the rest of the film in a decidedly cryptic fashion, the boys amble into the swamps in search of freedom and a recording contract. The film is long on characters and short on story and a perfect backdrop for Clooney's glib and handsome Ulysses. T. Bone Burnett assembled a kickass sound track that helps to solidly anchor the film in the great depression. John Goodman is the Cyclops or a one eyed bible salesman and Holly Hunter is superb as Ulysses very fertile wife. This will interest most classics majors and Coen brothers fans and just about anyone stuck on an airplane for at least 103 minutes. PG13  2001

O.C. and Stiggs What is amazing about this stinker is that Robert Altman directed this comedy . Two teenagers become obsessed with harassing an affluent insurance salmon and his family. O.C. (Daniel Jenkins) lives with his addled ex cop grandfather ( Ray Walston) While Stiggs (Neil Burg) resides with his cactus obsessed alcoholic mother and family. Dennis Hopper play his pot growing Viet Nam vet character a la Apocalypse Now and Martin Mull has a bit part as hipster millionaire. Way too goofy, this was a bad National Lampoon story that got over-budgeted. The highlight is the live performance by King Sonny Ade and athe jacked up Studebaker. 1987 Rated R 109 Minutes 1/99

Oldboy Time and again we have warned you about Korean films being exceptionally violent. This one wins the Palm d'Or for unnecessary squirm in your seat and avert your eyes brutality in Technicolor. Somebody kidnaps Dae-su, an obnoxious businessman and locks him in a secured hotel room. Occasionally, his jailers gas him and cut his hair and straighten up the room while he's unconscious. At other times they drug him and infuse his brain with hypnotic suggestions. For no apparent reason, they dump him in a vacant lot after 15 years of imprisonment. He can't remember much, but a kind sushi waitress takes him home and cleans him up. He sets out to discover what he can about his captors. By methodically eating dumplings across the city, he eventually locates the food source used by his jailers. The delivery boy leads him to his place of entrapment and he wreaks havoc on the place. He gathers some clues but large sections of his memory have been erased, which hinders his search. Eventually, he finds his tormentor, Woo-jin, a kid whom he had crossed in high school. Revenge takes a far different route than you'd anticipate, or ever conceive. If you turned your head during Marathon Man or were uncomfortable with Clockwork Orange, this film will be too much to take. It's rated IIb which is equivalent to PG13. If I saw this at 14, I'd still be having nightmares. Otherwise it is an unbelievable tale that breaches more taboo subjects than a Todd Solondz film. 2004 Directed by PARK chan-wook who took the best directors prize at Canne for this gem. This is the second film in his gruesome revenge trilogy. If you can handle this, look for "Sympathy for Mr. Vengance", oooh wee.

Once Were Warriors This is Lee Tamahori's kick ass movie about life among the Maori underclass in New Zealand. A bit preachy but powerful tale of Jake Hake ( Temeyra Morrison) an abusive husband who is lost and disenfranchised from his tribal roots. He is also one ugly drunk. You may find a strong illusion of realism here, that is craftily rammed home by the mostly Maori cast. Led by their powerful mother, Beth ( Rena Owens), the family eventually skips over dad and his generation and the kids regain some strength as they learn their heritage. There is nothing even close to this films portrayal of life near the bottom, and the damage rendered by Christian/European culture. Unbelievable tattoos. 1995 Rated R 120 minutes

Ong-Bak The Thai Warrior Ong-bak is the name of the village's prize possession , an old stone image of the Buddha. When the head of the image is stolen by some Bangkok Antiquities thieves, they send young Ting (Tony Jaa) to the city to retrieve it. Trained in the religious martial art of Muay Thai, no one can mess with Ting but he is naive in the ways of the big city. He garners the help of a Bangkok tough who came from his village. There are some extraordinary fight scenes in which the pacifist Ting is called upon to flatten hulking Australian and American opponents. He dispatches them with ease but is no closer to finding the head of Ong-Bak. In the end, the two locate a criminal mastermind who tricks Ting  into a title bout, and then orders him killed. Our country boy proves more resilient that his adversary and good triumphs in the end. You won't want to see this for the story line, which is a little like a Bowery Boys movie,  but the stunts and fights are outrageous and worth a look. 2005 Thai Rated R 105 minutes

The Opposite of Sex Written and directed by Don Roos, we follow Christina Ricci as Deede Truitt, a sixteen year old hellion who leaves home in Creve Couer, LA and moves in with her gay 1/2 brother Bill ( Martin Donovan). She trashes her step father's funeral, seduces her brother's lover and generally has more fun than anyone else in the film. There are some excellent one liners. Lisa Kudrow and Johhny Galecki round out the cast. Better than the coming attractions would have one believe. Rated R 100+ minutes 1998 5/99

Outside Ozona Robert Forster is a widower truck driver whose fate coincides with and out of work clown, a stripper, a one legged Amerindian beauty, her grandmother and a serial murdering physiatrist. They spin separate interwoven stories, filmed mostly in the front seat of moving vehicles. The excellent soundtrack is spun by DJ Taj Mahal who works with the his nervous station manager, Meatloaf. The cast includes Kevin Pollak, the great Swoosie Kurtz, Lois Red Elk. Sherilynn Fen and Fergie.  Directed by J.S.Cardone. 1998 Rated R 99 minutes

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Palookaville They set out to rob a jewelry store but somehow end up in a bakery. These three friend want to get into crime in the worst way, but lack the talent. Vincent Gallo is notable as normal Jersey guy who just needs to get a life.  1996 Rated R 90 minutes

Parents Renee Sheppard recommends this Randy Quaid film as a delightful cannibal feast. Delightful is not a term we would apply to this macabre story of a vegetarian wannabe kid whose parents keep serving up human leftovers. Neither horror film, nor comedy you may find it in either section. Directed by the actor Bob Balaban who also gave us the much better TV series Eerie, Indiana.  Sandy Dennis and Mary Beth Hurt round out the cast and Brian Madorsky is the kid. Thanks Renee  1988 Rated R 81 Minutes.

Pecker Edward Furlong plays the lead as Pecker in this funny addition to the twisted works of John Waters. It is the usual cast plus Christina Ricci ( from The Adamms Family) as Pecker's girlfriend, the "Stain Queen" and Mark Joy (Clerks, Chasing Amy) as Jimmy the kleptomaniac. In what might be a semi autobigraphical story, Pecker enjoys photographing his neighbors and Baltimore ( Where else? ) neighborhood. He gets discovered by Lili Taylor when he shows his work at the local pizzeria. He becomes the darling of the New York art world, damaging his relationship with family and friends. The story is thin and gets thinner, the joy in this film is Waters scorching of the SOHO gallery world and of couse the host of stupid characters. Music by Stewart Copeland. 1998 110 minute rated R.

Permanent Midnight Ben Stiller is the successful and stoned TV writer Jerry Stahlsbook in this sad biography. Jerry retells his story to Maria Bello over the course of 3 days in a cheap motel room. The film flashes back through the rise and fall of Jerry's career as heroin slowly strangled him. The drug scenes are realistic and increasingly desperate. Stiller does a great job with this demanding part. 1998 Rated R  

PI Directed and written by Daren Aronofsk, this is an obsession that is captured in black and white. Max Cohen (Sean Gullett) is a brilliant mathematician who is sought out by Wall Street and Hassidic Kabalists for his discover of the numeric meaning of life (47?). Max stared at the sun even thought his mother warned him not to and like Icarus, he pays the price for his pursuit for the ultimate knowledge. He takes an intersting host of drugs to quell his madness, alas to no avail. A few days after you've seen this, you may realize it affected you. 1998 Rated R B&W

Picnic At Hanging Rock This 1975 Peter Weir film has an unusual feel to it that was a good indication of his directing ability. A class outing in Australia gets lost during a turn of the century outing at a place called Hanging Rock. If you have not seen it, try the library, they'll surely have a copy. Thanks to Matt Kenneke who graciously reminded of of this Aussie classic. 1975 108 minutes Rated PG

Pink Flamingos Do you think John Waters is embarrassed that he made this ? Is Babs Johnson really a loser? Certainly Connie and Ray make little progress with their lives and Mama was probably not queen of the prom. Mink Stole has a part in this movie.

The Pink Mirror/Gulabi Aaina Bollywood meets Divine in this Hindi drag queen from Sridhar Rangayan and the folks at solaris films. If you ever wondered what it's like to be Indian and a drag queen, this funny film will give you more than a peek. Two older wo/men, Bibbo and her friend Shabbo make fools of themselves trying to seduce two handsome boys. It's a great send up of the Bollywood genre and if you pay attention you may get to see this at a local film festival. Unrated Hindi w/subtitles 40 minutes 2002

Plastic Utopia Written and directed by David Zellner with help from his brother Nathan, this is a dystrophic vision of suburban Texas living. The two brothers also co-star in this off kilter tale of two roommates who come from opposite social poles.  Frank Feldspar (Nathan Z)  is a red neck Elvis look-alike beat poet who mugs people for his livelihood . The room mate James Mirthstein  (David Z) is a hopeless mime that gives happy speechless mimes a bad name. James supports himself by making seashell handicrafts with his hot glue gun. When James gets called before a mime tribunal for infractions to their code, he decides to emulate Frank, and becomes a full fledged mime delinquent. Sure the joke wears thin, but there is enough originality, talent and stupidity to hold you till the end. There are other great characters like Corduroy Boy, Rancid Ruth and Industrial White Boy, not unlike an early John Waters film. It was okay, really. 90 minutes 1997 color 

Pollock Ed Harris is the star and director of this biographical film about the controversial painter Jackson Pollock. Marcia Gay Harden is great as Pollock's pushy Brooklyn paramour, the painter Lee Krazner. Although this film does little to dispel the myth that all great artists are alcoholic lunatics, the historic detail and precision acting carry the film. Look for Bud Corta as Pollock friend and art critic Howard Putzel. Val Kilmer has a cameo as the Teutonic William Dekooning, and Old Gyp the dog is played by the Australian Shepard Trecker.

Pucker Up and Bark Like a Dog If Phyllis Diller and the late Wendy O Williams were not in this stinker, I would never have pulled it out of the reject bin. Who finances this crap?

Prick Up Your Ears Joe Ortin and his talented lover take the British theatre by storm with Joe's outrageous plays and lifestyle. This biographical film has Gary Oldham playing Joe whose unbridled success drives a wall through his lengthy affair with Ken Halliwell ( Alfred Molina) . Vanessa Redgrave is good as Joe's agent.  It is an interesting and gritty story told as a flashback through Wallace Shawn who is writing Joe's biography. Directed by Stephen Frears 1987 rated R 110 minutes

Priscilla, Queen of the DesertThree drag queens in a bus speeding across the deserts of central Australia. Directed by Stephan Eliott and stolen by Hollywood for To Wang Foo.100 min Rated R 1994

Proof Martin doesn't trust anyone, so he takes photographs of just about everything. Because Martin is blind, he must then find someone to render an accurate description of his photos. I thought this one might end up on the perennial losers page, but, in fact, Martin has a great deal of pluck. Well written, well acted and worthy of your time. 1992 New Line 90 minutes

Pyaasa-Thirst Vijay is an under appreciated poet. Cast out by his family, they sell his poems as scrap paper. The are bought by Gulub, a whore with a heart of gold and she sets his poems to song.  She then finds the author and nurtures him back to health.He's doing prety well till he hears his mother is dead. He starts drinking, has an accident, gets amnesia and is given up for dead. Gulub sees that his poems get published and he is posthumously famous. While languishing in a hospital, he hears one of his poems and regains his memory. There's plenty more, but I'd hate to give it all away. Get the old B&W version of this story with Guru Dutt and Mala Sinha. 2 hours+ Unrated Hindi w/subtitles

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Quick Change Bill Murray Geena Davis and Randy Quaid are lame bank robbers who can't seem to make their getaway.  Tom Whiting wrote us: Bill Murray is a city planner who decides take his knowledge of city workings to rob a bank. He disguises himself as a clown who's " crying on the inside." The fun starts during the getaway in which they can't get out of the (NY) city. After his second backup plan fails, Randy Quaid asks " Is that our plane?" as they miss another flight. Bill Murray replies, " No, if that was our plane, it would be crashing." Stellar performances by Geena Davis and Jason Robards as the chief of Police. Thanks Tom.  1990 Rated R 90 minutes

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R-Zone Did you know there were South Korean troops involved in the Vietnam War?  Well, in a particularily tough fight an entire squad get's wiped out in an area known as the R-zone. The problem is, radio messages keep arriving from the zone asking for help. A hand picked group are selected from the syphilis ward and sent north to check it out. They set up camp in an old abandoned french colonial building and begin their search. Weird stuff starts happening and before long everyone is dying and it's obvious there are ghosts at work. Hey, that's the rule, all Korean films must be ghost stories, ultra violent or sappy love tales. This one has 2 out of the three. Guess which 2. Korean 2005  Rated IIb

The Raggedy Rawney This is a Bob Hoskins movie, from Handmade Films, that tells the story of a band of Gypsies that adopt an AWOL young soldier and hide him during World War I. I found a copy in the used movie bin at Blockbuter, which is usually a good sign. Rated R 102 minutes

Raining Stones Bob needs to supplement his meager income, but a life of crime just doesn't seem to suit him. Ken Loach directs this humorous tale of an Irishman trying to raise a little cash for his daughter's communion dress. 90 Minutes Unrated

Raising Arizona An early comedy from the Cohen Bros that feature Nicholas Cage and Holly Hunter. They set out to steal a baby from a couple that has just had quintuplets. They wouldn't miss just one. Extremely funny. Is that John Goodman as the motorcycle guy?  1987 Rated PG 13 90 minutes

Ratas, Ratones, Rateros Angel wakes up, smokes some dope, drinks a slug of tequila and contemplates the bloody stump of his left pinky. Two guys with guns bust into the room and the chase is on. Angel gives them the slip but kills one of his pursuers in the process and his troubles begin in earnest. He runs to his cousin Salvador in Quito and they proceed to terrorize their relatives and their friends. Angel seems to bring bad luck to all who come in contact with him as he eludes his growing list of enemies. A realistic tale of the wide class differences and squalor in South America's mushrooming cities. The best Ecuadorian film we have seen to date. Let us know how it ends, our copy was missing the last few minutes. 1998 Rated R Spanish w/subtitles. 

Ravenous A Grisly primer on human cannibalism at the turn of the last century. Captain Boyd is remanded to an outpost in northern California where he encounters a Scotsman who has eaten all his traveling companions. The motto is once you have tasted forbidden flesh, you will never lose your desire for more. Many of the cinematic rules of vampirism apply to this growing band of cannibals in this well filmed and not overly gory tale.1999 Rated R 

The Record Another Korean high school horror story, that begins with a practical joke played on the class dufus. They take him on vacation and stage a fake murder only to discover they've killed him. The kids all swear to secrecy and set his body on fire. It might have worked but he wakes up while he's burning and runs off a cliff. The kids dummy up about their crime but there are psychic dues to pay. Pretty poor. Rated III but we don't know why. Korean w/subtitles 90 min approx

Refugee  This is a beautiful desert film about people leaving someplace and going somewhere else. We bought the DVD without English subtitles so we really can't tell you too much about it . The photography was excellent. The guys at the video store assured us it's good. Starring Abhishkek Bachan and the stunning Kareena Kapoor. Directed by J.P.Dutta . 1995 color Unrated  Hindi supposedly w/English subtitles but we could not find them. 

101 Reykjavik Undoubtedly the best Icelandic film of the year, this is the tale of Hylrun and his rudderless life. Thirty something Hylnur (Hilmir Snaer Gudnason) is unemployed, lives at his mom's house and spends his time wisely, watching porn films and drinking beer. He has a semi- girlfriend, Hofy, played by Thrudur Vilhjalmsdottir, who eventually just gives up on him. Things start to get interesting when his mom brings home a girlfriend, Lola, a hot Flamenco dance instructor. Well, on New Years eve, mom is away and things tend to get a little rowdy in Reykjavik, and the drunken Lola (Victoria Abril) and Hyrur connect. A child ensues, and his mom and Lola decide to raise the kid as their son. That makes Hylnur the father of his brother or some such thing and he short circuits and actually moves out. This is the directorial debut of Baltasar Kormakur and tastefully laced throughout by various renditions of the Kinks' song "Lola".  90 minutes, Rated III, in Icelandic and some English w/subtitles DVD

The Redneck Vampire An amateur film about a trailer park bowling redneck who also happens to be a vampire. Check it out at their site redneckvampire.com .

Repo Man Harry Dean Stanton gives an Oscar deserving performance as a burned out car repossessers. While teaching Emilio Estevez the tricks of the craft, they repo a Dodge Dart with a radioactive alien in the trunk. Very hip. 1984, 95 minutes

Requiem For A Dream  After a hundred emails, we finally got off our asses and found a copy of this soon to be drug film classic. It seems Mrs. Goldfarb's boy, shoots a little heroin. Sometimes he sells his mom's TV to pay for his hobby. To raise a little cash, Harry and his friend Ti get into the retail drug business. They are very disciplined junkies and do not use a 100% of their own product, and soon they've got a nice trade going. Unfortunately, Harry's girlfriend becomes a good customer, which creates a few problems when the supply dries up. Meanwhile, Mrs. G (played incomparably by Ellen Burstyn) decides to lose a few pounds and she gets a roaring amphetamine habit going. Things start to slide and no one has anything to grip. You get to follow them down accompanied by an interlace of huckster evangelical TV vignettes and marvelous music. Set in my favorite part of Brooklyn, Coney Island. As always, find the unrated directors cut on DVD.

Reservoir Dogs An awful lot of folks wrote to say we overlooked this film. Actually, we thought everyone was a professional criminal in this Tarantino Classic. Maybe not. So here it is, we will not bother writing a synopsis since if you are here, you've already seen it.

Rikky and Pete An Australian brother, Pete,  ( Stephen Kearny) and sister, Rikky, (Nina Landis) leave Melbourne in their mom's Bentley and make for the outback for a change in lifestyle. The basic story with the domineering father the understanding mother, rage against authority have all been done before and done better. Their are some highlight like really good dynamite scenes, and that gangly bad guy from "Road Warrior's' is a drunken miner. Like all Australian movies it has a quotient of drunken scenes and car chases, one on foot. The gorgeous Tetchie Agbayani is Pete's girlfriend, and Pete's pretty handsome himself. 1988 Directed by Nadia Tass/David Parker 103 Minutes and rated R but just barely. 

The Ring   An American version of the of the oh so scary Japanese film Ringu. An odd video tape kills people seven days after they view it. If you can handle the cross cultural interpretation, go for the original or the Korean remake, otherwise this version is not bad either. Nicely set in the Pacific Northwest it stars Naomi Watts

River's Edge This must be the teenage version of "Stand By Me". Samson kills his girlfriend ecause she was talking about his mother. He then has a few beers and brings a few friends down to the rivr to see her corpse. Layne (Crispin Glover) decides they should hide the murder so Samson doesn't get in trouble. Matt, played by Keanu Reeves, has second thoughts and calls the cops. Everyone buys their dope from Dennis Hopper, who is his usual exbiker, ex murderer lunatic with an inflatable wife, Elly. Based loosely on a true story, if you can overlook the alienated teens theme its got some good performances. Directed by Tim Hunter. Rated R 1987 99 minutes

The Road to Wellville A tale about the Victorian spa movement that gave us breakfast cereal. Not very good.

Romeo is Bleeding For every bad movie he has made, Gary Oldman is in three that are brilliant. This is one of the latter. He plays Jack, an avaricious New York detective who sells a witness to the mob for 65 grand. The boys hire Mona Demarkov (Lena Olin)  do the hit, but she gets caught. Jack gets paid to kill her before she can talk, but this proves to be a little more difficult than planned. Annabella Sciorra is Jack's accomplice/wife and Juliette Lewis is great as his mistress. Busy guy ! Directed by Peter Medak Rated R 110 minutes 1994

The Royal Tenenbaums If you loved Rushmore and/or Bottle Rocket than you've probably already seen this new offering from Wes Andersen. Gene Hackman is the ne'er do well Royal Tenenbauam who fathered but did not raise three extraordinary children. Mrs. T (Anjelica Houston) kept her growing children in the limelight. They are now successful, if slightly neurotic adults. Chas (Ben Stiller)  has become a real estate mogul, Margot is a playwright ( Gwenyth Paltrow) and the third (Luke Wilson) is a tennis pro. His brother, Owen Wilson, who co wrote the script is their childhood friend and is now a pop historian. This terrific cast is rounded out with Bill Murray as Margot's confused husband and Danny Glover as Mrs. Tenenbaum's fiancé. Royal is feeling a bit paternal in his old age and decides that now might be a good time to have the love and affection of his family. This is a trifle inconvenient as they all have careers and Mrs. T is about to get remarried. He decides to fake a fatal illness and manages to gather his nutty clan around his bedside for at least a few brief days. It's a great story and every bit as entertaining as "Rushmore" only with an ensemble cast that Andersen  balances perfectly. Mr. Andersen went from independent director to mainstream director with just three excellent films and it appears he brought his talent with him. Well worth the 9 bucks, or wait awhile and you'll be able to rent it for $3.50.   2 hours rated R  

Rubin and Ed Howard Hessman (of WKRP in Cincinatti fame) is an outright bozo who is a member of an evangelical get rich real estate religion. While trolling for converts, he stumbles over Rubin, who lives with mom ad keeps a dead cat in the freezer. These two hold their own losers convention as they head out into the desert to bury Rubin's cat. I seriously doubt you can find this one, but it does have special effects by the immensely talented Chiodo Brothers. 1991 rated PG 13

The Ruling Class You always knew they were balmy. Peter O'Toole scours the British upper class in this farcical story of a lord who thinks he is the Lord. If Shakespeare had not died he could have written this screenplay. It's a little long, and may not hold your interest unless its a really rainy day. This was a recommendation by Rebecca Crowley who also liked White Mischief. Thanks Rebecca. 1972 Rated PG 154 minutes

Run, Lola, Run/Lola Rennt This is a 90 minute high energy German music video masquerading as a full length feature. A non-stop crime movie not unlike Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels; we follow the money as the red headed Lola literally runs around Berlin trying to help her boyfriend out of a jam. You will be exhausted by the end. Get the DVD for an excellent voice over track by the director.  

Rushmore Max is fifteen and he's struggling with his grades, his love life and his talent. As a scholarship student in an exclusive private school, Max takes little advantage of the educational benefits but sure likes his extracurricular activities. Bill Murray is a smug industrialist Herman Blume, who shares Max's view of the privileged Rushmore students and the lovely first grade teacher Miss Cross played by Olivia Williams ( she was in Sixth Sense, remember?). Anyway Max and Herman make asses of themselves vying for her attention, but not in the ways you'd anticipate. Directed by Wes Andersen who also gave us Bottle Rocket. 93 minutes, rater R 1998

Ruthless People You have to admit Danny DeVito is his best as an evil character. He is a wealthy industrialist who defies his wifes kidnappers to kill her . Bette Midler is the victim being held by the none to viscious duo of Judge Rheinhold and Helen Slater. Very, very funny.1986 Rated R 93 minutes

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St. John's Wort A Japanese haunted house tale that is a technically updated version of the traditional High School thriller. Naomi inherits a house and she goes to visit it with her ex boyfriend, only to find out her real father was a famous painter. They get trapped in the house during a storm which blocks the road. Sound familiar? They discover his hidden secret, that he kidnapped and painted children and their mummified corpses fill the basement. Rated OAT II Japanese w/subtitles 2001

Samaritan If you missed this years Pusan film festival you have probably not encountered the director Kim Ki-duk. who made this unusual film about two young high school girls who pick up middle aged men in chat rooms and charge them for sex. They are saving for a trip to Europe. Jue Young sets up the liaisons and collects the cash while Jue Woo actually sleeps with their johns. She kind of feels sorry for them and takes notes on their professions and idiosyncrasies. Unfortunately, the police catch up with them and Jue Woo leaps out a motel window and dies. Her distraught friend decides to revisit all their tricks and refund their cash since she no longer needs it for their trip. She also sleeps with them just to relive her friends experiences. Her policeman father catches wind of her hobby and starts to tail her male escorts. At first he just harasses them, then he drives one to suicide and the next one he beats to death. So this is just as brutal as many Korean films but it is more challenging and as cerebral as it is visceral. Also look for Kim Ki-duk's recent film "3 Iron"  95 minutes Korean w/subtitles 2004

Sangam This Raj Kapoor feature is considered a classic from one of the most famous names in Indian film. He wrote, directed, edited and stars in this film whose title is the meeting place of India's three sacred rivers.   It is a Shakespearean tale of three friends who separate and meet later in life. This triangular love story is complicated by their mutual respect and the strictures of arranged marriage. Hindi w/subtitles B&W Insufferable lengthy

Sante Sangre Mom is an actress with no arms so her son stands behind her and gesticulates as she performs. If I remember correctly, it was Dad who chopped them off. From the man who gave us El Topo, Al Jedorowsky. 1989 120 min Look for the NC17 cut.

The Scent of Green Papaya This is a well told tale of a young kitchen servant in an upper class Vietnamese family. Set during the post colonial era, we follow the orphan girl Miu up through her womanhood while her employers family dissolves around them. Slow stuff, but I figured it had food in it.

Search & Destroy has a great cast with Griffin Dunne and Rosanna Arquette playing the lead losers in this bizarro tale. Christopher Walkin plays his usual spooky guy and Dennis Hopper and John Turturro add to the weirdness. Although the main characters have more money by the end they're still losers in my opinion. Tell me what you think. Filmed in Hackensack, NJ and environs. 

The Serpent and The Rainbow This movie was so bad it spoiled the book for me. Ostensibly it 's a quasi documentary about a Harvard ethno botanist who discovers (I.E.: Buys) the secret to making zombies. In the process, he gets Zombified, but live to tell about it. If you like the hallucination scenes here, be sure and check out Roger Corman's The Trip.

Sexybeast This might have been just another British thug movie but this one has Ben Kingsley playing his most un-Ghandian role to date as a gangster, Don Logan. Don has been sent to Spain to take Gal Dove (Ray Winstone-"Nil By Mouth) out of retirement to do one last job for boss Teddy Bass. Ray and his ex-porn star wife Dirty Dee Dee (Amanda Redman) really enjoy their debauched sun tanned existence an they are remiss to give it up. Don threatens Gal into agreeing but mysteriously disappears enroute back to London. Teddy is not happy but the heist goes off as planned and the end twists in a direction that will suck you in. There is so much palpable tension throughout this film, your jaw may ache by the time the credits roll. Directed by Jonathan Glazer. Rated R94 minutes English and Cockney 2001  

Shadey Oliver Shadey has an unusual talent, he can project an image onto film with his mind. British intelligence wants his talents so he agrees to work for them in exchange for enough cash for his sex change operation. They renege for fear the operation will affect his powers so he gets Katherine Helmond to castrate him with a kitchen knife. Are you still with me ? He then shaves his chest cross dresses and goes about his life after dodging all the spies who are tailing him. I think Patrick MacNee plays Shadey and look for the great British/Indian Actress Madhav Sharma as a church custodian. I 'd be surprised if you can find this one, I got my copy dumpster diving behind my local video store. 1987 PG-13 about 90 minutes British? 

Shakes the Clown Some one gave Bobcat Goldthwaite enough money to write, direct and star in his own movie about an alcoholic birthday clown, whom all the children love. He's in love with Julie Brown who plays a world class idiot but a kick ass bowler. Shakes has lots of self inflicted bad luck and loses his big shot as a TV host to Binky, who also tries to steal his girlfriend Lots of vomiting and stand up comics dressed as clowns. Look for Adam Sandler as Shakes best friend. Also Robin Williams has a great bit part as a mime instructor. 1992 Rated R 87 minutes

Shiver A Taiwanese supernatural thriller about a policeman’s wife who has some odd side affects from a bullet in her brain, as her husband investigates a series of brutal killings, they realize his wife has precognition of the crimes. Just so-so. Mandarin w/subtitles 88 minute 2003  Rated IIb

Sholay (Flames) Jai and Veru are two criminal brothers who have save a cop during a robbery and get arrested in the process. The police inspector asks their help in ridding his village of a bandit gang that is sucking them dry. He offers them a sizeable reward and a pardon if they can free the town. They both fall in love with village girls and fight a deadly duel with the dacoits. Real action with lots of gunfire and non stop action. Lots of fun.  Directed by Ramesh Sippy 1975 Hindi w/subtitles 190 minutes

Sick You know it's a bad sign when you find three copies of the same obscure video in the used video rack. This is a documentary about Super-Masochistic-Bob-with-Cystic- Fibrosis. It won a lot of awards and we'd like to nominate it for the 2003 NOT FOR THE SQUEAMISH AWARD as it is way way too gross for the non S&M viewing public.  A brief synopsis: Bob is dying and he convinced a couple of assholes to follow him around with a camera and film him nailing his penis to a 2 by 4. The End. 1998 Unrated 92 minutes

Sid and Nancy How can you feel sorry for two self absorbed rock & roll junkies. This film is a spastic effort with lots of style and virtually no substance. Gary Oldman is the infamous member of the Sex Pistols, Sid Viscious. He's great in this part opposite Chloe Web , Sid's American groupie girlfriend. Sid is a lost soul with marginal musical talents whose love of herion is greater than his love of music and perhaps Nancy. There is a great scene where Sid and Nancy visit her family in New Jersey. All in all, this film is getting a little dated but it still shines in spots. Directed by none other than Alex Cox. 1986 Rated R 111 m 

Sideways If you have no patience with wine snobs, you ought to skip this. However if you like slow, uneventful films with good acting and a subtle snail's paced story, this may be just your cup of tea. Two ex-college room mates, now in their 40's head for northern California for a week of carousing and wine drinking. Sort of an oenophile's bachelor party. Miles is a mousey English teacher, wannabe author and real serious about his wine. His college buddy, Jack is a voice over actor, who's getting married at the end of the week. He is determined to play the field for the few days he has left. It all works out. Everybody gets drunk, everybody gets laid, some deception ensues and some lies are told. The end. 2004  Rated R 135 minutes

Silver City John Sayles pulls in all his friends in an attempt to expose the Bush dynasty. Essentially, Chris Cooper plays a George W. look and sound-alike gubnatorial candidate of a state similar to Texas. He is a moron who cannot string two sentences together but he is supported by a wealthy behind the scenes industrialist and political dad. The hero of the story is a reporter/investigator who discovers the media is beholding to big money and no one will listen to his tale of gross environmental misconduct. Lots of stars with excellent acting but it's a politically toothless story from such a diehard lefty like Sayles. Really disappointing. 2004

The Sleazy Uncle I have heard that not all Italian movies are sex farces, but this film is not the exception. Uncle Luca ( Vittorio Gussman) prowls the movie theater groping girls in the dark. When he has a heart attack, he contacts his long lost successful nephew, Ricardo ( Giancarlo Giannini) . He hits Ricardo  up for 3 million lira to pay for a bypass operation. Uncle Luca then uses the money to throw a great party which is more fun than an operation. There is eventually a philosophical face off between the self indulgent poetic uncle and the level headed upper middle class nephew. You get to decide who won at the end. Directed by Franco Brusati. 104 minutes Unrated Italian w/subtitles. 

Sleepwalker A woman is translating an ancient Chinese manuscript when strange events take over her otherwise calm existence. Directed by Sara Driver 1987  79 Min

SmallTime  Jeffrey Reiner directs a spare, tight crime drama about some seriously untalented criminals. Glenn Plummer is Ben, the leader of this low rent posse who have asked to perform a drug sale for "The Dutchman" . With 1/2 a million dollars in coke stuffed in a bowling bag, Ben sets out in a Chrysler Le Baron convertible with his two protégés, Chinaman and Jesus for the big "pop". Bored waiting for the Man, Jesus invites a few hookers out to their desert hideaway and they dip into the product. Things get bad, then things get worse. Lots of fun. 1999 Rated R 90 minutes

Smash Palace Basic rule: If a movie has a junkyard in it, it has to be good. This film reminded me of Steelyard Blues with weird accents. Charlie Sinel highly recommends this one, and he has impeccable taste in movies.

Snapped Director Jesse Fiegelman has created another weird tale of life along the Jersey Shore. Sean (David Wheir)  is a summer kid who overstays his welcome and keeps his summer job in a photo lab. For fun, he culls out all the kinky prints to show his friends. One rather interesting young woman (Gaby Hoffman) brings in photos of dead animals. This is kind of quirky film that is really quite good. Look for Mr. Fiegleman's next film "Hotbox" Unrated  85 minutes  VHS*

Snatch A new Guy Ritchie film that has all the non stop action of 'Lock, Stock, And Two Smoking Barrels' plus Brad Pitt. Pitt plays an Irish Tinker who is the bare fisted boxing champion of his "Piker" clan. The mob kills his mother by burning her alive in her caravan to try and keep him in line. The tinkers revenge is both unexpected and thorough. A real intricate tale well woven by Mr. Ritchie and filled with edge of your seat activity throughout. 2001  90 minutes Rated R 

Social Intercourse This film was made in a week for $15,000 at a borrowed house with volunteer actors. It is a house party movie with people dancing in their underwear, lesbians kissing, druggies, dweebs, twits and a fight scene. The sub-hero of the tale is Todd who can't get laid because he drives a Tercell and can't get past his last relationship. Pretty close to your average post college party. Nice credits. Directed by S.Lee Taylor who also plays Todd. 88 Minutes Unrated  A First Rites Film

Soft Fruit Christina Andreef directed this complex story of a family of weight conscious sisters and their criminal little brother who all come home to watch mom die. Mom is obsessed with Jackie O and her husband is a Russian émigré to Australia who shoots crows out the kitchen window. There are enough strong characters here to fill out three films and this is one peach of a family. There's a great scene when the kids take mom to the beach and they all share her morphine on the drive home. Don't pass this by, because you hate depressing movies, it's quite funny. Rated PG13 90 minutes  Australian 

Sonatine This is a Japanese mobster movie of the Yakuza genre directed by Kitano Takeshi. It might be more aptly titled "Yakuza On Holiday" as the story is about a Tokyo posse that go to Okinawa to help out a related clan involved in a gang war. They travel up to Okinawa and decide to hide out at the seashore as their in town hideaway was recently bombed. These hard core gang member frolic in the sand, take showers in the rain, have fireworks fights, play Russian Roulette and just have a grand vacation. Occasionally, they meet up with rival gang members and they face one another and blast away. It's so weird, that nobody runs for cover or ducks behind anything during the gunfights.   Eventually, these skirmishes take their toll and the boss Mr Murakawa has to machine gun the whole other gang to even the score. Then he commits suicide. I can't figure out why, it must be some Samurai warrior thing , not at all like the Sopranos. Rated IIb 94 minutes Japanese w/subtitles

Spanking The Monkey Poor Raymond, he just can't seem to lose his virginity, until his mother helps him out. In fact Raymond just can't get much right since he came home from his freshman year at MIT. You really feel like stepping into this movie and giving him a hand. The acting and writing are great and the story is timeless, although Raymond does not gouge out his eyes when he wakes up next to mom. Good stuff. Directed by David O. Rusell 1994 106 minutes

Spider Baby This black and white horror film is a campy 1960's drive in horror story directed by Jack Hill and starring Lon Chaney, Jr. The reclusive Merry family suffers from a genetic defect that causes some family members to regress to infancy as they grow older. Lon plays Bruno, the faithful family retainer who watches over this strange brood in the proverbial mansion on the hill. As the Merrys get older, he keeps them in a pit in the basement and feeds them raw meat as a sop to their cannibalistic cravings. Well , poor Mantan Moreland has to deliver a package to the family, and , guess what, he's never seen again. This begins a chain of circumstances that degrades into a murderous cannibal frenzy as the teddy clad Merry sisters (Carol Ohmart and Beverly Washburn)  dispatch their visitors. So if you are fond of homicidal teenage girls in night gowns, this may be your cup of tea. Brother Ralph  (Sid Haig) is cool. Almost a cult classic, but not quite.   100 min, B&W 1964 unrated

Spinal Tap (see This is Spinal Tap)

Star Maps Carlos comes back to LA, back to his crazy mother and his abusive pimp of a father with aspirations of making it in Hollywood. In the meantime he has to hustle his ass for dad spending long days selling maps of stars homes and himself on a Beverly Hills street corner. This movie blows Johns away, same setting, same line of work but a much tighter story of the most screwed up family you'll ever hope to encounter. If you are interested, Carlos does get his shot at stardom, but I won't tell you the outcome.  Dir/writer Miguel Arteta 1997 Rated R 89 minutes 

Stigmata Frankies mom gives her a pair of rosary beads as a gift from her recent trip to Mexico. Stolen from the corpse of a holy priest, the bead's quickly have Frankie experiencing Stigmata, or reliving the wounds of Christ. She starts losing it when modern medical science cannot explain the nail holes through her wrists. Before long she is speaking Aramaic( with a Gallilean accent ) and the film devolves into religious drivel. A must for Catholic school graduates, but perhaps a bit too obscure for the rest of you. Directed by Rupert Wainright. Gabriel Byrne plays a believable priest who falls for Patricia Arquette as the sexy Frankie Paige. Rated R 102 minutes

StillCrazy An aged English rock band reunites against their better judgment. Essentially a Spinal Tap copy, with music by Mick Jones of Foreigner and Chris Difford of Squeeze. Very funny performances by Stephen Rea, Billy Conolly and Juliet Aubrey. Directed by  Brian Gibson 1999 Rated R 95 minutes 

Stir of Echoes Kevin Bacon is a normal guy until his earth mother sister-in-law hypnotizes him. Instant 6th sense results and he finds all is not well in his Chicago neighborhood. His son is hip to the power and walks him through it. Directed by David Koepp and taken from the Richard Matheson novel of the same name. Wait till it's on TV. 1999 Rated R 90 Minutes more or less.

Straight Story Alvin can't see too well anymore and his hips don't work so good, neither. He smokes too many Swisher Sweets cigars and he probably ain't got long to live. When his brother Lyle has a stroke, Alvin sets out on his lawn tractor to pay him a visit and to mend an old grudge. The only problem is Alvin lives in Iowa and Lyles up in Wisconsin. David Lynch directed this epic journey for Walt Disney. That's an odd combination, and yet there is enough Lynch in this G rated movie to satisfy a "Blue Velvet" fan. This is far more than a 2 hour ad for John Deere products. Alvin recollects and dispenses wisdom as he slowly chugs north and touches most everyone he encounters. Based on a true story, it is finally out on video.. 179 minutes Rated G 1999

Strictly Ballroom  Who would have guessed ballroom dancing could hold your interest for an hour and a half. Unlike most Hollywood dance team films, this one is fun and interesting. 1992 Rated PG

Sudden Manhattan If you are a Hal Hartley fan, you'll know Adrienne Shelly as the lead actress in Trust and The Unbelievable Truth . Adrienne wrote, directed and stars in this off kilter story of a disoriented New Yorker who keeps witnessing homicides. After the first siting she links up with Adam, (Tim Guinee) who becomes her impotent lover who prefers Russian novels to sex. She seek out  a gypsy fortune teller (Louise Lasser)  for assistance, but that does little to clear things up. It is all rather clever and far better than that crap you've been watching on TV. Look for her second film I'll Take You There which should be along, shortly. Unrated 81 minutes 2000 

Suicide Kings What? Christopher Walken playing a mob boss. How unusual. He played a more memorable mafiosa in True Romance, but it is a character that suits him. Charlie has retired from a life of crime when he gets kidnapped by a pack of well adjusted prep school buddies. Why? There's no point in giving the whole thing away. They stash him in a summer mansion in the Hamptons, duct taped to a desk chair and most of the movie is shot on that one set. . This could have been a play and except for the lame car scenes with bad Pulp Fiction dialog, it works fairly well. There are multiple ending on the DVD release so you can pick your favorite. Directed by Wayne Rice who keeps the whole thing moving. 1998 103 minutes Rated R 5/99

Summer of Sam Spike Lee sets out to remind us of what it was like during the summer New York was rocked by the .44 calibre killer, the Son of Sam. We get an overview of the crime and a microscopic view of a neighborhood in the Bronx throughout that summer. The acting is good, the story is poignant and the murders are brutal. This is a good one, if the subject appeals to you. 

Sympathy For Lady Vengeance The long awaited third installment in Park Chan Wook's vengeance trilogy will surprise and perhaps entertain all you sick perverted bastards that loved "Sympathy For Mr. Vengeance" and "Old Boy". Lee Geum-ja confessed to abducting and killing a five year old boy when she was only 19. We meet her thirteen years later when she is finally released from prison. She has done what was needed to get out, a model inmate, shamming piety and remorse to gain her freedom, with only one thought in mind. Vengeance. Geum-ja has had plenty of time to plan how she'll get even with the guy who did this to her. It starts off slow but you'll eventually come to see the brilliance of her scheme. Her target is the kidnapping pederast who made her confess to his crime by kidnapping her illegitimate daughter. Lee Geum-ja slowly calls in all the favors she has accrued among her prison inmates. She begins by finding her daughter in Australia and taking a 19 year old lover. She finds her victim Mr. Baek, still teaching children and still up to his old ways. What a beautiful web she weaves. Of course Park Chan Wook does not disappoint his fans. There's plenty of his trademark ultra violence, when needed, but this film is more subtle and less gruesome than it's predecessors. The cinematic touches and excellent photography are even better than in Old Boy. As Park gets better budgets, he has honed his craft and perhaps tempered his shock factor to reach an audience greater than you handful of twisted souls who adored Mr. Vengeance. I have to say, I was a trifle disappointed when I first saw it, I mean it was great but the wince factor was only a 7 out of 10. On second viewing, I have to admit. it's excellent. If you are not already a fan, work your way backwards through the trilogy as it is perhaps more palatable that way. 2005  95 minutes Korean Rated III (18+)

Sweetie This Jane Campion story tells the tale of diametrically apposed twin sisters that live at home with rather "potty" parents. Kay is an agoraphobic/bulimic who fears most everything while her rotund sister Sweetie has few cares or inhibitions. 1989, 97 minutes

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Tank Girl An adaptation of the comic book starring Lori Petty and Malcolm McDowell not to mention Ice T. Malcolm controls all the water and Tank Girl gets some with the help of mutant kangaroos known as Rippers. Who says you can't make a good movie from a comic book. 1995 Rated R 104 minutes

Tatie Danielle Auntie Danielle (Etienne Chelton) is one conniving old bitch. After she kills her aged roommate, she moves in with her niece and her family. She subtly and not so subtly changes the behavior of the entire household to suit her whims. When the family goes on vacation and leaves her with a house sitter Tatie Danielle really acts up. Some of her cruel finesse is lost in the translation, but this film will forever change how you perceive your older relations. French w/subtitles  1991 Unrated  110- minutes

Tea With Mussolini Il Deuce and Cher have top billing in this waste of your time.

Tell Me Something Plastic garbage bags filled with chopped up male corpses are turning up at regular intervals in Seoul. The tainted Detective Cho is given a chance to clear his tarnished reputation if he can solve the case. He quickly discovers that all the victims were involved with the attractive Su-yeon, and her last jealous boyfriend is the obvious suspect. That is until he, too, turns up dissected in a hefty bag. As Cho becomes familiar with her past, we find she is a seriously disturbed young woman who was abused by her famous artist father. You'll probably peg the killer in the first ten minutes, so don't bother watching this for anything other than the exploding bags of bloody body parts. They turn up in parks, elevators, dropped on highways and other inconvenient locales. As a bonus, his partner, Detective Oh gets skewered to death by a fork lift. Lots and lots of gore. Written and directed by Youn-hyun Chang  Rated III Korean 2001

Telling Lies in America Karchy moves to America with his widowed father and they set out to adapt to their new homeland. In his travels the teenaged Karchy crosses paths with Kevin Bacon who plays a sleazoid hipster DJ called Billy Magic. Billy is a pro at payola and he hires the young Hungarian immigrant  as his bagman. Karchy is not a naive as most kids his age and he figures out pretty quickly that America is not quite as simple as it first appeared. Bill Clinton could take some cues from this kid. 2000 Rated R 90 minutes.

Tetsou: The Iron Man This short freaky Japanese film is a blend of Eraserhead. Le Chien Andalou, and Robot Wars. The hero of this unusual film has a serious metal fetish. He goes to abandoned factories and collects chunks of scrap metal that he surgically inserts in his flesh. He makes all you body piercing fans look like wimps.  After getting hit by a car, he mutates and chunks of metal start popping out all over his face. His girlfriend gets into it at first, but it soon proves fatal to her.  This is extremely brutal and degrades to an incomprehensible robo-mush towards the end, but if you enjoy shocking black and white footage, go for it. You know there may be a small contingent of you body alteration freaks that might actually draw some inspiration from this one. Hey, don't overlook the sequel, Tetsuo II: Body Hammer. 1989 Rated III, 67 Minute,B&W Japanese, with useless English Subtitles.

Tetsuo II: Body Hammer More of an adaptation than a sequel to The Iron Man, this is far slicker and slightly more comprehensible. If we got it right Tomoo Tanaguchi and his brother were made into robo-human weapons as a kids. They killed their creator/father and grew up weird. When Tomoo gets pissed off, guns sprout from his chest and he  makes the Terminator look tame. This is really too frigging strange for 98% of us, me included. 1992 82 minutes Rated III Japanese w/subtitles

That Sinking Feeling Stupid Scottish criminals make off with  200 kitchen sinks. The rest of the film is what they do with them. Director Bill Forsythe's first commercial release.1979 In Scottish without English subtitles Rated PG 90 minutes

Themroc Michel Piccoli and Miou-Miou star in this 1973 French period piece that may not be available in North America. A middle class guy throws in the towel and walls himself up in his apartment with his sister ( why stop at cannibalism when you can have incest too). They proceed to capture policemen and serve them up as "pork" to their neighbors. The best part is they devolve into urban primitives and, yes, they grunt in French.

Things to Do In Denver When You are Dead This movie has been overlooked and some say with good reason. It probably has a bad cop in it somewhere, but I am not going to rewatch it to verify the point. Great title and an excellent ending. Yes of course Steve Buscemi is in it and so is Christopher Walkin and Christopher Lloyd. 1995 Rated R

This is Spinal Tap Rob Reiner directed this mock rockumentary about the declining luck of a British rock band.Christopher Guest is in this and it certainly left it's mark on his film style. It makes you wonder how the Stones hung together all these years. Look for Fran Drescher as a bit player 1984 85 minutes Rated R.

Time of the Gypsies a funny story about an awkward kid with tele-kinetic powers, There are some very strange visuals in this Yugoslavian film. It tells the story of this young boys training as a Gypsy and might well be an Eastern European 'coming of age ' movie. He is kidnapped and sent to Italy where he loses his innocence and learns how to fleece the gadza. Good ending and well worth hunting down.

Three...extremes Like the earlier release "Three", this is just that, three short films by leading Asian directors. The first one, "Box" is by Takishe Miike is in his best disturbing style. A young circus acrobat works as a contortionist for a pederast magician. There are so many flashbacks and twisted sexual connotations that we defy you to sort this one out. The second film is a boiled down version of director Fruit Chan's full length film (see below) "Dumpling. The third short "Cut" is a Korean offering from Park Chan-Wook, the director of "Sympathy for Mr.Vengance" and ""Old Boy". If you are unfamiliar with his brutal style this is a good introduction. Rated III for good reason.

The Tin Drum You want to see a weird childhood, you have to sit through this German tale of little Oskar who refuses to grow while the Nazi's were in power. Taken from the Gunter Grass novel of the same name we forgot all about this one until Rebecca Crowlyt brought it to our attention. Rated R 1979 really long German w/subtitles

Tokyo Drifter (Tokyo Nagaremona) A Japanese mobster, Tetsu has decided to give up 'the life' and retire from Kuratsu's crew. His last job, is to disentangle his boss from a tricky lease on a legitimate real estate deal. If he could do that, the film would end and we'd miss out on all the cool  gangsters driving around in big US cars and doing hard to fathom Japanese mob stuff and hearing Kuzo Sushi sing the title song. Directed by Seijur Suzuki 1966  83 minutes

Tom Yum Goong Do you like elephants and martial arts? Granted, it is a strange combination, but this film has an abundance of both. Kham grows up in the Thai forests helping his dad and their elephant. Por Yai,  collect wood. When their great bull elephant sires a baby, Kham gets to raise him and the two become inseparable. At least until some evil poachers steal the pair of pachyderms. Kham, played by the Muay Thai martial arts genius Tony Jaa. must retrieve the elephants and honor of his family. There's plenty of fighting against amazing odds and plenty of well placed kicks and jabs before the task can be accomplished. Lot's of cool scenery, plenty of stunts and too many chase scenes to count. The elephants are cool, too. If you want more of the same see Tony Jaa in Ong-Bak.  Thai 2003 Rated IIb

A Touch Of Evil Orson Wells is one badass cop in a Texas border town where he's been faking evidence and popping bad guys for decades. Gharlton Heston plays a none too believable Mexican detective who takes on Wells on his own turf. Marlene Deitrich plays a Madame and Zsa Zsa is also in this. Recently re released in a cleaned up print it may even show up on DVD soon. A treat for Wells fans, he stars directs and wrote it. 110 minutes 1958 Unrated

Track 29 If you are a Gary Oldman fan, you may want to hunt for a copy of Track 29. Theresa Russel is a psychotic house wife married to an obsessed model railroader Dr Henry Henry (Christopher Lloyd). Martin ( Gary Oldman) appears as her now grown son whom she put up for adoption at age fifteen. Martin has a rather obvious sexual attraction to his long lost mother while Dr. Henry carries on a latex gloved affair with Nurse Stein ( Sandra Bernhard). You'll have to sort out if and when Martin is real or a hallucination, which is not readily apparent. 1989 Rated R 80 minutes

Trainspotting You already saw this one, I know, but it has to be on this list. The toilet scene was definitely my favorite, thank God Smell-O-Rama never caught on. Don't you think the dead baby was too fake? A group of heroin addicted friends go about their daily hassles and hustles until they hit the big one. Both the most realistic and bogus junkie movie out there but also grossly entertaining. The uncensored cut is always better.

Traveller American travelers are thought to descend from their Irish tinker/gypsy counterparts. Traveling rogues who swindle just about anyone, these are modern day gypsies who tar roofs and seal driveways with crankcase oil. This really doesn't do a whole lot for creating a positive Gypsy image but, hey it sort of belongs here. Starring Mark (Dirk Diggler) Wahlberg and Bill Paxton, this is a funny story of a cousins introduction into the clan. Some of the cons are very clever and well worth seeing so you don't become their next victim. Pretty well done and maybe a bit too well researched. Well written.

The Tree Of The Wooden Clogs

Trees Lounge Steve Buscemi stars in this not so tragic tale of a luckless guy that just can't seem to figure out the rules of life. He loses his pregnant girlfriend to his boss and gets fired in the process. It really isn't as depressing as it sounds.

Trouble in Mind For some reason, this was in the Cult section of the video store. Kris Kristopherson is an out of jail ex cop that tries to save two losers Keith Carradine and Lori Singer. Divine plays a none too plausible mob boss (That's why it was in the cult section?) and the terrific actress Genvieve Bujold plays the ex girlfriend. The dialog was lame, the story was stupid but hey, you might like it. Directed by Alan Rudolph with a Maryanne Faithful soundtrack. 1985 Rated R 110 min

The Truce John Turturro takes on the role of Primo Levi in the Italian authors autobiographical tale of returning home from Auschwitz. Consistently excellent , Turturro is magnificent as the bedraggled Levi working his way home to Italy across ravaged eastern Europe. As the prisoners get closer to home they regain their hope and pride but you sense they will never again take life for granted. Although similar in subject, this is a far different slant than "Life is Beautiful" but every bit as good. 1996 color produced for European television in English. 2 hours unrated directed by Francesco Rosi.

True Love A film by Nancy Savoca about love in the Bronx. Kind of an Italian verion of My Big Fat Greek Wedding , but made in 1989. There's a small part by Tony Sopprano's sisters. 1989 101 minutes Rated R 

True Romance  This is pretty good

The Truth About Jane and Sam Sam is a Hong Kong yuppie working on his fledgling journalism career when he spies Jane who's wearing sunglasses in a movie theater. Intrigued, he follows for awhile and catches up with her in a dance club. He works her into his current assignment on disenfranchised youth and pays her to let him trail her for a few days. Shocked by her drug dealing street survivalist life, he tries to add a note of gentility to her roughshod approach to. This film is a bit of a poke in the eye for Hong Kong's bourgeoisie and exposes layers of prejudice you would not have suspected. It's really a 20 something's quirky love story, but if it's raining out, it'll help pass the time. Cantonese w/subtitles 90 minutes Rated IIA

Trust Maria is 16, ( Adrienne Shelly) and pregnant by the star of the football team who doesn't want to hear about it. She bumps into Matthew (Martin Donovan) and their deficient lives seem to complement one another. Both are lost in America and this is a good portent of what Hal Hartley is capable of. 1990 Rated R 107Minutes

twentyfourseven Darcy is an  optimist. He organizes the 101 Boxing Club to try to instill a little discipline into the lost generation from his working class English town. Mr. Hoskins is at his best when he can shine as the lead in a well written film. A cut above your average feel good poor kids conquer all sports film. This is very well done and a bit of a surprise ending. B&W 1998 Rated R 96 minutes British

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u-turn Sometimes Oliver Stone movies get better if you let them age a little, and sometimes they don't. This film got mixed reviews when it was released back in 1997, but it really ain't that bad. Sean Penn is Bobby, a drifter in an old Mustang that blows a radiator hose in the middle of Arizona. He entrusts his car to grotty Daryl (Billy Bob Thornton) and then gets picked up by Grace McKenna (Jennifer Lopez). She is a small town lonely housewife looking for someone to help hang her drapes. Well Mr. McKenna (Nick Nolte) shows up, pops Bobby in the nose and then tries to hire him to murder his wife. You'll also find Claire Danes as a local hotty with her pugnacious boyfriend played by Joaquin Phoenix and John Voight as a blind, semi-prophetic Amerindian. The overall story is so-so but you just might want to see it for the talent. 1997 Rated R 

The Unbearable Lightness of Being Tomas is a handsome doctor in Prague with a penchant for lovely women. When he asks them to take their clothes off, they gladly comply. His mistress,  Sabina, is a sensual artist who looks incredible when she wears her hat to bed.  He meets the bashful Tereza (Juliette Binoche) while performing an operation at a spa. She overcomes her shyness and she too, takes her clothes off. They soon marry, but Tomas has a hard time parting with the sensuous Sabrina and her black derby. This lengthy film (3 hours) is an accurate rendering of Milan Kundera's erotic novel with the same title. Daniel Day-Louis is Tomas and the lovely Lena Olin is Sabina. You may never see three cuter asses in one film. 1988 Rated R 178 minutes English

Under the Volcano Have some prozac handy after you watch this one. A down and out diplomat lives the life of a dog as an alcoholic stranded in Mexico in the adaptation of the Malcolm Lowry novel.

Uno Aksel Hennie is the writer, director, producer and star of this sorta depressing Norwegian tale of a lost soul who works in an Oslo gym. The owner's son is dealing steroids and when he gets popped, they expect the whole staff to keep quiet and share the blame. The problem for David is his dad is dying and his mom is home alone with her other son who has Downs syndrome. David decides to tell the cops who really owns the drugs and get out of jail to be with his family. That's fine but now he's a rat and is ostracized by his employer and friends. Very brutal and sometimes tender it is well acted and Hennie is to be congratulated for managing it all so well. David on the other hand has little control of his fate and ends up physically and mentally beaten to a pulp. So why is he smirking? 103 minutes Norwegian w/subtitles

Until the End of the World Directed by Wim Wenders, of course it is hard to understand. William Hurt stars in this fast paced debacle that has something for everyone and not much of anything. Great soundtrack and Solveig Dommartin has enough of a French accent to hold my interest. Max von Sidow and Sam Neal play the wise elders.

The Untold Story-Part 2 When his wife's cousin comes down to Hong Kong for a visit from mainland China, it becomes apparent that the wife has to go. This is a horrific film and really tasteless and brutal by Hong Kong standards. Anyway they barbecue the wife and of course feed her to the cops. In Untold Story 1 the waitress gets made into steamed pork buns. We do not recommend either one of these films. Rated III for good reason. Cantonese and it may have subtitles but you won't be reading them.

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John Carpenter's Vampires James Woods, Daniel Baldwin, Tina Griffith and Maximillian Schell all got roped into working on this too slick hi-tech version of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I did learn a new piece of vampire lore; however, from this one. If you harpoon a vampire and winch them into the sunlight they light up like a road flare. Your time would be better spent cleaning the grout in your shower. 1998 Rated R 94 minutes

Vengeance is Mine Kind of strange Japans serial killer movie that is quite unlike the others on this list. If there weren't so many corpses, you wouldn't know this was a wholesale slaughter film. Something definitely gets lost in the translation and you'll never know what it was. A mild mannered guy, Enokizu, goes around killing women in otherwise peaceful surroundings. The murders are graphic and disturbing even though the main character is not. I was more confused than anything else. Directed by Imamura Shohei and is considered a classic by most Japan filmophiles. Japanese w/subtitles 120 min 1969 Unrated

The Village of Widows In a small fishing village off the coast of China, 3 sisters are entrapped by the bizarre marital practices of the town. Wives and husbands must remain celibate for their first three years of marriage, then they can sleep together on national holidays. They cannot live together, however, until a son has been born. If a woman breaks these vows and loses face, she voluntarily walks into the ocean and drowns. It.s hard to decipher, but the film supposedly takes place in 1949. It is a long dark, droll film that may of interest if you're an anthropologist. Cantonese w/subtitles Rated II

Visible Secrets We have recently discovered that there's a lot more to Hong Kong films than Jackie Chan and Jet Li . This one is a hip gothic offering that begins with a headless corpse walking around. The man in question was just beheaded when he fell under a trolley. A little girl peeks under the trolley and sees the head staring back at her. In the next scene, this girl, June, has grown into a stunning young woman who haunts the discos.  She selects Peter for the evening and he gets a glimpse at her psychic abilities. June wears an eye patch and a protective amulet to keep her ghosts at bay. They follow her everywhere and frequently possess the folks around her. Poor Peter, he's put off by all her weirdness, but too in love to make a run for it. There is a lame explanation for it all, but watch this for the style and photography and I'll bet you can overlook the weak story.  We found another headless corpse movie entitled "Tomie", in Japanese but it is not as good.  There is a cool website that goes with this www.visiblesecret.com which is in Chinese. There are hundreds of these films available on VCD for just a few dollars each. You can find them in Chinatown in Toronto, Vancouver, New York and possibly San Francisco and of course Hong Kong.  Send us recommendations and we'll make up a page for them. 90 Minutes Cantonese w/subtitles Rated IIb 

Visible Secrets II The unusual thing about Japanese sequels is they bear little or no resemblance to the original. Like Visible Secrets I, this is a ghost story of sorts. Jack and Ching Kwok are newlyweds who stumble upon a suspiciously inexpensive apartment in Hong Kong. The place must be bad luck, because on the first night, Jack gets run over when he goes out to buy condoms. It's nip and tuck and he eventually pulls through but he has to use a crutch for the rest of the film. WHen he gets home, Chris calls on an old girlfriend for advice  with his marriage and Ching's increasing weirdness. It appears that Ching is possessed by a 1920's style spirit and at the same time someone is bugging their apartment. It all breaks down right about here, and the rest of the film is filled with rational explanations for everyone's odd behavior. Perhaps if they threw in a little pointless sex and nudity they could hold you till the end, but I'd say don't bother. 2002 Rated IIb Cantonese w/subtitles 90 minutes

Voodoo Academy Do not bother. A school full of hunky blond boys run around in bulgy boxer shorts while their voodoo priestess headmistress turns them into dolls. Rated r 90 Min 2000

Voodoo Dawn Blockbuster put this in their sales bin for $1.99 and I couldn't pass it up. It is really not worth discussing, but it is a voodoo movie and I did sit through it to the end, so I though I'd drop it in Raymond St James is a voodoo priest that chase two white college boys around the swamps of Louisianna Directed by Steven Fierberg. 1990 Rated R 83 minutes

 Voodoo Dawn Not to be confused with the other film of the same name, in this one Michael Madsen is an ex-con that learned a little voodoo while he was in the slammer in Louisiana. He sets out to use his black arts for revenge once he is back on the street. Somehow Jezebel (Rosanna Arquette)  who is a stripper sets out to do his dirty work. Her assignment is to bring down A.J.  ( Balthazar Getty) and what remains of his family. It's all too confusing and not worth your time. It is, however,  a contemporary voodoo movie so we sat through it to the end.  Rosanna looks a little different here, or is that my imagination? Look for Pat Perkins as Queenie, the voodoo priestess. 

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Waking Ned Devine Poor Ned wins the Irish Lotterie, but dies from the excitement. Two of his plotting friends decide to cash Ned's ticket, but must impersonate him to get the winnings. This requires complete colusion among the inhabitants of the isolated seaside village. This tale of wholesale greed is full of funnyvisuals and has no problem showing saggy old people sans clothes (which was not as shocking as Harvey Keitel in the buff in that piano movie) . This should be available on tape real soon. Rated PG 13

Waiting for Guffman A serious spoof on the aspirations of a local theater group waiting to be discovered. This movie is ruthless in it's reach for humor and there's something that will insult all but the most politically incorrect. You'll recognize the whole cast. There's a good chance you will enjoy this.

Water Falls on Burning Rocks / Tropfen Aui Heisse Steine / Gouttes D'eau Sur Pierres Brulantes Kind of an unusual French tale of seduction. Leo, (Bernard Giraudeau) a fifty something homme d'affaire brings a young handsome red headed boy (Malik Zidi) home for the evening and he stays the night. In the next scene, six months later,  they are living together and bickering like an old married couple. Though both agree that their lovemaking is extraordinary there is little else they agree about. Leopold is really a grumpy old sod but cold, calculating and very manipulative.  Franz's ex-girlfriend Anna (Ludvine Sagnier) turns up and then Leo's ex (Anna Thomson) also joins the party. Before long Leo has them all waiting on him in the kitchen and the bedroom. Half sex farce and half Greek tragedy.Written by Werner Fassbinder, this is German story played with French actors that's gets a little culturally muddled in places and really comes across more as a play on film.  In French w/subtitles Francois Ozon directed

Welcome to The Dollhouse If you have forgotten how much it sucks being thirteen, got get a copy of this film. It will give you renewed sympathies for the adolescents around you. Ola Lundin makes a good point when he noted "Dawn" (Heather Mattarazzo) did not need glasses to emphasize her nerdiness. Being from Sweden, however, Ola, you'll have to visit New Jersey before you can appreciate some of the subtler suburban humor. Most reviews of this movie use the word "unsettling" to describe this film, but we didn't. Directed by Todd Solondz. 1996 90 Minutes Rated R

Welcome to Woop Woop Director Stephen Elliot, who made "Priscilla Queen of the Desert" put together an unusual cast for this Outback odd film. Teddy, (Johnathon Scheach) is on the lam after his girlfriend shot two mob enforcers. He goes to Australia, because he likes cockatoos and is soon mixed up with the randy young Angie. They enjoy each other immensely until she pumps him full of Thorazine and marries his drugged shell.  He wakes up in a pig sty and finds he is stuck in a truly unusual outback town. Kind of an Australian hybrid of John Waters and the Twilight Zone. Angie's Father is played by Rod Taylor ( his bio says he was in "The Birds") who seems inordinately interested in his daughters sex life. You may never visit Australia if you believe 10% of what goes on here. Stephen Elliot claims he had a hard time getting funding after this one came out. 1997 Rated R 97 minutes Australian

What Alice Found  Alice sets out from New Hampshire on a drive to Miami. Her car breaks down and she has her cash stolen before she gets out of New Jersey. Fortunately and older couple, Bill and Sandra come along in their RV to rescue her. They offer her a ride to Miami and she learns a few things about the couple along the way. Ivey teaches her a few things about men, and Ivey knows cause she is hooking as they drive south. Meanwhile, Alice sheds some of her New Hampshire ways and Ivey, who is a retired go-go dancer, spiffs up Alice's appearance and her sensibilities. When Alice finally tried to do a little half price hooking of her own at a truck stop, Bill comes to her rescue. She decides to let him pimp for her. It all seems so easy and her first trick is a well mannered farm boy and it is more like a high school date. She is blown away by her first paycheck. They screw their way south and Alice reflects on her white trash life. A little slow at times, but it's an interesting subject and an unusual coming of age story. Emily Grace does a nice job  as Alice and Judith Ivey plays an excellent hard boiled southern mama as Sandra in this well written and somewhat unpredictable tale.  Written and directed by A Dean Bell 2003 Rated R 93 minutes English

What's Eating Gilbert Grape Johnny Depp is Gilbert, who desperately needs to get out of this small town so he can grow up. So what if Leonardo DiCaprio plays his retarded brother, it's still a really well made depressing movie that starts and ends nowhere. 1993 rated PG-13 120 min

Where the Green Ants Dream Werner Herzog's first all English movie is about Aborigines vs. the mining companies in the outback. Bruce Spence (from Road Warriors) is a geologist who changes sides as he listens to the locals. In typical Herzog style there are a few preposterous scenes and large pieces of machinery but this is probably his most coherent film to date. Too bad. 1985 99 minutes Rated R

Wicked City A Hong Kong futuristic thriller along the lines of Blade Runner. You have a great video store if they stock this one. You might get the idea that Men in Black borrowed a little too heavily from this one. Attractive monsters interbreed with humans to create misunderstood hybrids, while a special squad of police elite hunt down and destroy the more malignant clan members. Why were the women all naked and the men in clothes ? The film is in Cantonese with strange subtitles.

Wings of Desire Wim Wenders classic angel movie that stars Peter Falk. There are at least three languages spoken but none require translation. It really does get better on the second and third viewing. The sequel, So Near, So Far was made nine years later, but does not fit into this category. Skip the US remake City of Angels with Nicholas Cage and Meg Ryan.

Wishing Stairs Jin-Sung and Soo-Hee are best friends and ballet students at an all girls art school that has a peculiar staircase that grants wishes. Of course this film is from the Korean Girl School Ghost Story Genre, but it is not as awful as some of them. The two friends are in competition for a slot at a Russian ballet academy, until Jin-sung takes the lead by pushing her friend down a flight of stairs. When doctors tell Soo-hee that she can no longer dance, she self defenestrates out the hospital window thus providing the necessary ghost for the tale. Meanwhile there was a fat girl ,Hae-ju,in school who really takes a lot of abuse for her corpulence, She makes use of the wishing stairs to trim down which works well but upsets the cosmos. Eerie stuff becomes the norm, ghosts and bloody showers haunt the dorms. The ghost of So-hee must exact revenge on her friend but we'll let you discover the details if you're that interested. Korean w/subtitles rated II 97 minute 2004

With A Friend Like Harry Michel is on vacation with his wife Claire and their 3 little daughters. He meets an old school chum, Harry, at a rest stop, and Harry invites himself over for a drink. Before long, the apparently wealthy Harry and his girlfriend Plum, insinuate themselves into the family matrix and begin buying expensive gifts and trying to alter their lives. It seems Harry was a big fan of Michel's writing when they were in school and he goes to great lengths to get Michel writing again. It starts getting creepy but with enough suspense to hold you till the end. Harry is kind of like a malevolent Amelie.  Directed and written by Dominik Moll 116 minutes Rated R French w/subtitles DVD  

Withnail and I Director Bruce Robinson's  twisty vision of alcohol/drug abuse set in  London during the late 60's. Withnail is played delightfully by Richard E. Grant. Withnail is a degenerate, perfume drinking, out of work actor who rooms with Paul McGann who is the " and I" in the title. They live together in an indescribably  filthy flat in Camden Town.  The bilious pair are broke, cold and sober so they decide it is time for a road trip. They persuade Withnail's gay aristocratic Uncle Monty to lend them his house in the country. Hendrix wails in the background as our sybaritic anti-heroes head out of town in a seriously battered Jaguar. Life in the country leaves the budding thespians as cold and hungry as back home, but they do find the local pub to their liking. Uncle Monty turns up with food, drink and designs on "and I's " ass. In time, they head back to town, only to find their encrusted apartment has been inhabited by a pair or drug buddies. The party continues, unabated until "and I " gets a acting call back that sends Withnail into fits of jealousy. They part company in Regents Park zoo, where Withnail stays on to recite poetry to the wolves.  Recommended by Nico who called it "the substance abuse flick of all time Much more than the life and times of an effete boho in  60's " Thanks Nico 1988 Handmade Films 104 minute Unrated

Woh Kaun Thi ? Director Raj Mohan's eerie thriller opens in a rain storm with Manoj Kumar stopping to pick up an apparition outside a cemetery. His windshield wipers on his Ambassador stop working in the blinding storm. His supernatural passenger directs him to his destination where she immediately disappears into the rain. Like most Hindi films there are spontaneous outbursts of song, but with patience you'll find a decent tale underlying the standard format.  B&W 1964? 2 1/2 hours DVD Hindi w/subtitles

Women's Private Parts Writer and director Wong Chun Chun filmed this quirky documentary that is a collection of intimate discussions with women in Hong Kong. She interviews single women, aging female porn stars, gigolos, lesbian couples, divorcees, housewives, teenage girls, prostitutes,  mistresses and the woman who holds the Guiness Book record for the most sex partners in 24 hours (251). She distills hundreds of hours of drunken rambling down into a hundred minutes of surprising, raunchy and witty dialogue. Filmed with an all female cast and staff. . This would make a good 1 hour HBO special. Rated III , 100 min Cantonese with English and Mandarin Subtitles.

X

X The Malcolm X film Really good if the subject interests you. Spike Lee directed this and Denzel Washington does an outstanding job as Mr. X.

Y

You Shoot, I Shoot This Hong Kong spoof is about a hit man, Bart, who hires a young director, Chuan, to film his murders. A gorgeous socialite, Ma, hires them to kill her ex-boyfriend and is so pleased she tells all her friends. Their  films are so well produced, the team quickly becomes the most sought after assassins in the city. Other photo/hit squads try to emulate their success, but none come close to their combined talent. It is very funny. 90 minute, Unrated, 2001

The Young Poisoner's Handbook Hugh O'Conner is a twisted little sod who makes a science project out of poisoning his immediate family. He gets some excellent results, like when all his Dad's hair falls out in clumps from arsenic in the tea. Not quite as bizarre as some, until you realize it's a true story. 1995 Rated R 99 minutes 1/99

Z

Zardoz Did you actually see this film when it came out? Bet you don't remember it. Well, it is the 23rd century and Zardoz is a giant stone head that floats down from heaven and spits out guns. He beseeches his followers to go out and kill. Sean Connery is Zed, one of the brutal Zardoz devotees. Dressed in a red speedo and double bandoliers, Zed sneaks into the head and flies back to Vortex 4 where the cognoscenti live. These immortals farm, trade and live the civilized life. Zed is treated as a primitive slave and studied for his sexual prowess. There are lots of swirly 70's scenes and just way too much silly camera work. Sean probably forgot he was in this one. Too freaking weird. What was director John Boorman thinking when he made this? Charlotte Rumpling is the immortal love interest. Oh yeah, Zardoz got his name from the Wizard of Oz. Hope we didn't spoil the surprise.   1974 Rated R 104 minutes 

Zazie dans le Metro Zazie visits her Uncle in Paris while her mom takes off foe=r a fling with her latest beau. Filmed in 1962 this movie could be a mutant French Jerry Lewis/Monkees film that may only interest cinemagraphic historians. We listed it here because her uncle is a performing drag queen and we didn't have anywhere else to stick it. 1962 color 92 min French w/subtitles 8/99

Zero Effect If you had to update Sherlock Holmes, and you selected Bill Pullman as Sherlock, cast Ben Stiller as Watson and substituted methedrine for cocaine you would have Zero Effect. There are not enough guns to make this an action movie but it is quirky detective film where Daryl Zero is the most objective and observant man in the universe. Working exclusively and reclusively for wealthy clients, Daryl meets and succumbs to Gloria, his female Moriarity. Not the best movie of the year but a treat for Holmes/Stiller fans and a way to pass a rainy day. 112 minutes Rated R 1998. 12/98

Zhou You's Train Zhou Yu is a porcelain artist who falls in love with a poet, Chen Ching. They have a commuter romance and she spends a great deal of time on the train to and from their trysts. Although this would pale  against an American or French love tale it is fairly erotic for a Mainland Chinese film. Yes, this is  a modern Chinese film that actually has sex in it. How weird is that. During her commute Zhou makes the acquaintance of a you veterinarian and adds him to her tag team of lovers. You realize, however it is not the men but the train ride that really turns her on. God, Amtrack does nothing for me. Anyway, life is good until she decides to try out the bus. A little confusing, a little too much clothing, but hey this is genuine progress and bodes well for the future of Chinese cinema. 2003 90 minutes Mandarin w/subtitles

Zindal One of my favorite Korean films is Oldboy. Zindal is a Hindi remake or mutation in which an Indian software developer Bala  disappears and is held hostage for 14 years. He is in a cell where he is cared for and fed fried wontons and basically kept alive, He struggles to stay sane in his captivity, training his body all day but he’s slowly  going crazy He's can't figure out who is imprisoning him and why, Then one day he is simply released without an explanation. He simply wakes up in Bangkok on the street. He vows he will track down his kidnappers and extract vengeance but he has no place to start, He finds a cell phone and his tormentor calls to say he has been released from his small prison to a bigger one,. His only connection with his captors is the fried dumplings they fed him in captivity.  So he sets off for Bangkok's Chinatown and just keeps eating dumplings till he finds the ones he’s eaten for the last 14 years. From there it is simple work to track down his jailers. The results are none to satisfying. This is long but surprisingly good. I figured there is no way a Bollywood film will copy the brutality of  Old Boy, but  it comes surprisingly close.

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